My wonderful, beautiful wife and I have just celebrated our first anniversary. In total we’ve been together almost five years together, but despite this we still haven’t really figured it out.
This past year has been the most challenging and rewarding of my life. So, here are the things I’ve learned over the last 365 days:
1. Marriage isn’t always easy; it takes work.
Marriage, a house, two cats, and thinking about having a baby. It’s rasied my anxiety levels to a whole new high. We have a serious responsibility and it’s tough.
2. I had no idea how selfish I was.
I’m sure I’m not alone here, but it was much easier for my wife to think of us as a team rather than individuals. It’s not Kate and Sammy anymore. It’s “us” and “we.”
3. However, you should still be a little selfish (sometimes).
That being said, you still need to be a little selfish and do things that make you happy.
4. People communicate differently.
My wife and I are working hard to learn how to communicate with each other. She likes to talk things out, and I avoid all confrontation.
5. You don’t have to agree on everything.
My wife and I have slightly different views on style and fashion, money – how many kids we want. And that’s okay, as long as we respect each other’s views.
6. Don’t stretch yourselves too thin.
Take some time to just chill. Take a nap, binge-watch “Orange Is The New Black,” or just do nothing.
7. Sometimes, you just need to listen.
As humans, we have the urge to solve problems and really just to talk. In marriage, or in any relationship, you should just learn to listen.
8. Actions speak louder than words.
Don’t tell her you are going to do it. Do it.
9. To trust and be trusted are amazing feelings.
Be present, and get excited about every moment you get to spend together
10. Never settle – Make your life together everything you want it to be.
11. Say “I love you.”