Back-handed compliments are much like a sweet little hug followed by a kick in the shin.
I actually find them to be quite funny. My normal response is just to laugh them off, but in my head there is a whole different story going on.
1. “You look so much like Tina from the L word! I couldn’t stand her.”
2. “You were so fun last night. You really don’t care what people think, do you?”
3. “Oh she’s your girlfriend? WOW fair play to you, you’ve done well.”
4. “I wish I could feel as good in baggy clothes as you do!”
5. “Your dancing is so original!”
6. “Your shirt is just… so nice. If I wore that I would look like an absolute dyke.”
7. “I’m just not curvy like you. I mean that as a compliment.”
8. “She will definitely like you… she used to go out with this beast.”
9. “I’d love to be as smart as you and care less about what I look like”
10. “I cannot believeeeeee you’re working there. How the hell did you get that? Do you know someone who works there?”
11. “[insert any lesbian character on TV] really reminds me of you.”
12. “I did not expect you to do better than me in exams…congratulations!”
13. “You’re moving abroad? With no job? God, I wish I had your guts! I’m just too much of a perfectionist”
14. “Ohhhhhh, I didn’t know she had a girlfriend. She just seemed like the single type.”
15. “You are looking really well these days you are almost becoming a threat”
16. “The way you do things just cracks me up.”
17. “It must be so nice to not have to worry about how you look everyday.”
18. “You might be able to fit into this.”
19. “She’s your girlfriend. I thought she was sister. You look so a like.”
20. “Your hair looks way better (shorter, darker, longer, up, etc.).”
21. “Wow you have a healthy appetite.”