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5 Best Apps For Exploring Your Sexuality

Where should you turn for a ménage à trois?
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So you’re ready to explore your sexuality. Maybe you want to be a unicorn in some couple’s threesome or begin your own polyamorous relationship.

The internet, of course, has all the answers, so you want to use an app. Or several. Which apps should you turn to?


Tinder

Pro:  As one of the largest dating apps, Tinder has an enormous pool of users.

Con: Many of those users are straight and/or men.

Pro:  You only match with people who express interest in you, so rejection is minimal.

Con: People make hasty judgments based on appearance.

Pro: Many people on Tinder want hook-ups and new sexual experiences.

Con: You can’t filter based on sexual desires, such as threesomes.

Verdict: A great place to start, but the options can be overwhelming and some of the characters are less than savory.


OKCupid

Pro: An extremely large and diverse pool of people.

Con: Many inactive or spam accounts.

Pro: You can judge people not just by their photos, but by their extensive bios.

Con: People on OKC tend to ramble about themselves – do you really want to read someone’s 800 word autobiography?

Pro: Not connected to your Facebook, so little chance of you awkwardly matching with friends and coworkers.

Con: That dream date you go on could be a murderer.

Verdict: A more old-fashioned, pre-Tinder way of dating that has potential, but requires more effort than swiping.


Her

Pro: Women-only, so no chance of creepy men.

Con: An extremely small pool of users means that you may run out of people to match with after 6 swipes.

Pro: All of the users are queer women.

Con: Not all of the users are open to hook-ups or to sexual exploration.

Verdict: A very quaint app that is useful for finding a girlfriend, but not always for finding a threesome.


Bumble

Pro: You can only match with someone for 24 hours without initiating contact, so you’re pressured to actually reach out.

Con: If you match with your dream girl and 24 hours go by, she may be lost forever.

Pro: Women always have to message first, so you won’t receive messages from creepy straight men.

Con: Most queer female users tend to be monogamous.

Verdict: An interesting app that doesn’t offer much more than Tinder, but it might inspire you to actually message the people you match with.


Feeld

Pro: This app is exclusively for people wanting non-monogamous liaisons.

Con: Your Facebook friends can find you on the app, so your sexual desires are relatively public.

Pro: This app caters to a wide variety of people wanting all sorts of sexual activities.

Con: You’re never quite sure whom you’re meeting, so be sure to communicate explicitly about your sexual desires ahead of time.

Verdict: An experimental app that may offer you what you didn’t know you wanted.

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Author
J. Marie graduated from Duke University with a degree in International Relations and dreams of being a creative writer--dreams she's now realizing as a musical theatre writer in NYC. She's passionate about global black identities, black representation in media, and leather-bound notebooks. She also loves backpacking through a new country at a moment's notice, and speaks Spanish, Swahili and Standard Arabic.

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