As women who are interested in other women, we’re stuck at a particularly confusing vertex of girl crushes. We’ve got our platonic bestie crushes – those women who we aspire to be like. We’ve also got our OMG-breathless-crushes – those women whose pants we want to be all over. Lastly, we’ve got our soulmate crushes – the women who have completely changed how we feel about life. Sometimes the lines between them are pretty blurry, too. How can you decode your feelings and figure out what’s really going on?
We’ve gathered 5 signs that your girl crush is more than a crush – the signs that say you should definitely pursue this woman and see where it leads. Are you prepared to take the next step?
Sign #1: She’s the first thing you think of in the morning.
From a psychological standpoint, the first thing you think of in the morning is probably going to be the last thing you thought of the night before – and generally, the things we think before bed are the same things we thought about all throughout the day. If you wake up thinking about her, you probably spend most of your time thinking of her.
If you absolutely can’t get her off your mind, it might be more than just the butterflies.
Sign #2: She texts you “good morning”.
To be clear, there is a chance that she’s just being friendly – I used to mass-text my entire contacts list when I was walking to work in the mornings – but, most likely, if she’s texting you first thing in the morning, that means that you’re in her wake-up thoughts. Like we discussed in #1, that quite possibly means she was thinking about you all day.
If she seems to feel the same way as you do, it’s worth exploring those feelings.
Sign #3: You seem to spend a lot of time together, or talking to each other, when you don’t necessarily “have to”.
When we really like someone, we try to spend as much time around each other as possible. Sometimes, it gets obsessive and creepy and stalker-ish – make sure you don’t let it go there, please – but, usually, it’s because the two of you have a lot of similar interests, or at least you’re pretending to, in order get to know each other better.
If you’re spending all your time together anyway, there might be a reason – look into it!
Sign #4: You swear you shared “a moment”.
It’s hard to have that “special moment” feeling if the other person isn’t feeling it, too. Humans are pre-programmed to read certain body language cues certain ways by the time they reach dating age, so if you think you had a moment, she probably thinks so, too.
If you felt a spark, might as well check to see if there’s a fire.
Sign #5: You’re afraid of what will happen if you don’t explore your feelings.
If the idea of not telling her how you feel is enough to make you nauseous or anxious, you should tell her how you feel. Even if it’s not love, it’s best if you understand your feelings – especially if you’ll be seeing each other on a regular basis. You can’t be friends with someone you have unresolved feelings for. Your heart won’t let you.
If you feel like you need to tell her how you feel, you do. It’s that simple.