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How Religious Lesbians Are Finding Love

Thousands of Christian lesbians are turning to
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“No gays allowed.”

Since its launch years ago, the dating website has always catered to heterosexuals only, on the basis of religious freedom. “Gay Chrisitan” was an oxymoron.

The website became embroiled in a grueling 3-year legal battle with the state of California for violating the Unruh Civil Rights Act, which protects consumers from discrimination based on sex or sexual orientation. Recently, Christian Mingle finally lost, and was ordered to allow same-sex members to match up.

Catholic Mingle, Adventist Singles Connection and Black Singles also begrudgingly followed suit.

But gay and lesbian Christians would like to go somewhere they are accepted not merely tolerated. They have trouble finding anything deeper than a hook-up on apps such as Tinder and Grindr, but don’t want to invest in websites like Christian Mingle that will never truly cater to their needs.

More and more, queer Christians are turning to a website called Christian Gays.

With over 10,000 members, the website is relatively small but growing quickly, and offers more than just the swipe-and-chat system that has become popular with contemporary date-seekers.

Members can find community and make friends by joining a list serve, hopping into a chat room or communicating on forums. All members who sign up are automatically subscribed to the listserve and to several general forums so that they can begin chatting with like-minded members.

Christians looking for love can meet one-on-one with a Dating Service and Friend Finder, which has matched hundreds of happy couples to date.

The website boasts that its membership “consists of sincere people of all ages, all genders, all faiths, at all stages of life, and all stages of reconciliation of their face and sexuality.”

You don’t have to be out in order to use the website. In fact, many members aren’t out, and look for support and community with other queer Christians in the same situation.

The site also includes educational articles and resources for queer Christians and their family members. The founder says, “We want to provide information to help educate people that there is no conflict with Scripture for a person to be gay and Christian Just as Scripture was misunderstood to promote slavery, so now we have a better understanding about the clobber verses used against us, and we want to share the answers we have found.”

Transgender Christians have also found a home here. There are specific forums and chat rooms designated for transgender members who would like to meet, pray, date and discuss Scripture.

The website has its drawbacks, particularly the outdated design, but has potential for improvement.

New members are welcome, so if you’re looking for someone to share your faith and your heart with, memberships start at $2 a month.

Learn more at

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J. Marie graduated from Duke University with a degree in International Relations and dreams of being a creative writer–dreams she’s now realizing as a musical theatre writer in NYC. She’s passionate about global black identities, black representation in media, and leather-bound notebooks. She also loves backpacking through a new country at a moment’s notice, and speaks Spanish, Swahili and Standard Arabic.

One Comment

  • AR says:

    This headline is extremely misleading and pretty offensive. There are other religions in the world that are not Christian based. This article does not mention Muslim queers, or Jewish Queers, or Buddhist queers, any non-Christian queers. I know that the western world assumes that everyone is Christian, but y’all should know better.

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