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Should I Let Her Go?

Is it fate or just loneliness? Our expert weighs in on your options.
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We aim to get to the heart of your sex and relationship problems, so if you need advice, please contact us.

Q: Should I Let Her Go?

Dear KitschMix,

I met this girl online a while ago, we met for coffee, hit it off. Met up a second time at a show, ended up having sex in her car, but then I never saw her again after that.

I texted her a little while afterwards and she happened to be busy at the time, working a lot, couldn’t really make plans. I asked her to let me know when she had more free time. I’m assuming she just forgot, I did too, but I kind of want to see her again.

It’s been over a month since I last texted her. Would it be weird for me to text her now? We’ve only hung out twice; I don’t even know how I really feel about her. I think I’m just feeling lonely and wanting to be around new people, maybe curious to see where this goes.

I’ve never been one to really pursue anyone, I’m usually the asshole that blows people off or loses interest. Is it worth a shot or should I just let it go and find someone else?

Well, Reader, I think the first, most important question you need to ask yourself in this situation is: Why do you want to see her again? If you determine that it really is just you being lonely, then maybe it’s best to take some time to spend with your friends. Sometimes, when we’re in a relationship, we can forget about our friends, and that’s really not the best for our emotions. The lesbian urge to merge can be strong – we should fight it until we’re sure!

Of course, if you can’t determine conclusively that you’re just lonely, it may be worthwhile to explore the feelings with her. There’s probably a reason why you’re still thinking about her, right? Maybe it’s worth looking into. You never know, sometimes the best situations start in the most unexpected of ways.

It does, however, seem like she’s not really that interested. I don’t like when girls play games, like acting hard-to-get to make themselves feel more desirable, so if you think this could be the case on her end, you shouldn’t waste your time and effort on her. Some girls like casual sex – there’s not a lot you can do about it. Maybe she doesn’t think you clicked.

It shouldn’t hurt to text her and ask, though – worst case scenario, you’ll find out that she doesn’t care to be with you, and you can move on without her. Best case scenario, she forgot or thought you wouldn’t be interested – and you can move forward from there.

Best of luck, Reader – I hope you can figure out the situation between the two of you and reach a satisfactory conclusion!

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Barbara is a 26-year-old lesbian living in California with her partner (and their “fur babies” - an adorably chubby puppy named Porkchop and a ball python named Ru). In the spare time she pretends to have, she enjoys horror movies, music of all varieties, reading, and complaining about the weather.

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