Tag Archives: bisexual stereotypes

Study Finds Slight Shift In Attitudes Toward Bisexuals, From Negative To Neutral

While positive attitudes toward lesbians and gay men have increased, a new study – led by researchers at IU’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion – shows attitudes toward bisexual men and women are relatively neutral, if not ambivalent.

The study, which is only the second to explore attitudes toward bisexual men and women, was led by Brian Dodge, associate professor in the Department of Applied Health Science and associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University’s School of Public Health-Bloomingtom.

He said,

While recent data demonstrates dramatic shifts in attitude (from negative to positive) toward homosexuality, gay/lesbian individuals and same-sex marriage in the U.S., most of these surveys do not ask about attitudes toward bisexuality or bisexual individuals. And many rely on convenience sampling strategies that are not representative of the general population of the U.S.”

The study looked at five negative connotations, found in previous studies, associated with bisexual men and women, including the idea that they are confused or in transition regarding their sexual orientation, that they are hypersexual and that they are vectors of sexually transmitted diseases.

The research showed that a majority of male and female respondents, more than one-third, were most likely to “neither agree nor disagree” with the attitudinal statements. In regard to bisexual men and women having the capability to be faithful in a relationship, nearly 40% neither agreed nor disagreed.

Those who identified as “other” had the most positive attitudes toward bisexuality, followed by gay/lesbian respondents and then heterosexuals.

Age played a factor in the results, with participants under the age of 25 indicating more positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women. Income and education also played a role: Higher-income participants were more likely to report more positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women, in addition to participants with higher levels of education.

Overall, attitudes toward bisexual women were more positive than attitudes toward bisexual men.

While our society has seen marked shifts in more positive attitudes toward homosexuality in recent decades, our data suggest that attitudes toward bisexual men and women have shifted only slightly from very negative to neutral. That nearly one-third of participants reported moderately to extremely negative attitudes toward bisexual individuals is of great concern given the dramatic health disparities faced by bisexual men and women in our country, even relative to gay and lesbian individuals.”

Bisexual men and women face a disproportionate rate of physical, mental and other health disparities in comparison to monosexuals—those who identify as exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual, Dodge said. Although research has not determined the cause, Dodge said that negative attitudes and stigma associated with bisexuality could play a role.

Data from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior shows that approximately 2.6% of adult men and 3.6% of adult women in the U.S. identify as bisexual. For females, that number is more than double the number of women who identify as lesbian, 0.9%. When it comes to adolescents, 1.5% of male adolescents (age 14 to 17) and 8.4% of female adolescents identify as bisexual.

Dodge said he hopes the results emphasize the need for efforts to decrease negative stereotypes and increase acceptance of bisexual individuals as a component of broader initiatives aimed at tolerance of sexual and gender minority individuals.

After documenting the absence of positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women in the general U.S. population, we encourage future research, intervention and practice opportunities focused on assessing, understanding and eliminating biphobia—for example, among clinicians and other service providers—and determining how health disparities among bisexual men and women can be alleviated.”

13 Things You Could Ask A Bisexual (But Please Don’t)

For a while in high school, I identified as bisexual. During that time, I made a lot of bisexual friends, and even though I eventually realized that I wasn’t into guys at all, they were generally pretty accepting of the path I took. Right away, I understood that those bisexual friends of mine faced a lot of the same issues that I did, as a newly-out (but “straight-passing”) lesbian. I still have a lot of my bisexual (and pansexual) friends, and the questions they face every day sort of amaze me.

In some ways, these questions are a lot like the ones I’ve had to deal with myself. (Yeah, just like bisexuals have to deal with perverts and creeps, us “straight-passing” lesbians have to deal with people changing our identities, too. Why does everyone want to paint me as a bisexual, and my bi friends as lesbians? I really don’t get it.)

Anyway, without any further ado, here are the top 13 things that bisexuals wish you’d stop asking them.


“Are bisexuals even real?”

Uh… Yeah, they’re real. Just the fact that you know someone who identifies as bisexual should be enough to prove it to you – never mind the fact that a lot of freaking people identify as bisexual.


“So when are you going to choose whether you’re gay or straight?”

  1. It’s not a choice.
  2. “Gay” and “straight” are not the only options.
  3. You’re an asshole.

“Aren’t you just being greedy?”

Um, not really. In fact, there are so many people out there who refuse to date bisexuals. Being bisexual isn’t about being greedy, especially when just coming out to a partner could make them change their mind about you entirely.


“Do you have a lot of threesomes?”

Maybe she does, and maybe she doesn’t. Either way, it’s none of your business – otherwise, you’d already know.


“Are you sure you’re not just confused?”

Fun fact: Most women who consider themselves confused don’t come out as bisexual. They come out as bi-curious. Which is, of course, similar – but at the same time, so very, very different.


“Are you experimenting then?”

Go right on ahead and combine those last two answers, and you’ll come pretty close to the sentiment here.


“Does this mean you’ll eventually be fully gay?”

What even is “fully gay” anyway? I don’t think anything is totally absolute like that. But maybe she will eventually identify as a lesbian. That doesn’t mean she isn’t bisexual now.


“But you’re dating a man, so doesn’t that mean you’re straight now?”

Being in a straight relationship doesn’t make one straight. Just like wearing “boy shorts” as underwear doesn’t make you a little boy. Sometimes, the labels we put on things aren’t so much for definition as they are for identification.


“If you date a woman, will that make you a lesbian?”

Well, no. Not unless she decides that’s what it means. Otherwise, she’s still bisexual.


“Do you just want to have sex with everyone you meet?”

Probably not. And if she does want to have sex with everyone she meets, you’ll know about it eventually. No need to ask and make things awkward.


“Aren’t bisexuals more likely to cheat?”

No. Cheaters are more likely to cheat. Bisexuals are just more likely to be bisexual.


“So, are you more gay or more straight?”

While it’s true that most bisexuals do have a preference, one way or the other, the idea that you can be “more” or “less” gay is sort of ridiculous. I mean, I get it – the spectrum is weird. But it’s weird for your friend, too, so let’s not try to overanalyze it.


“Isn’t it called ‘pansexual’ now?”

Not exactly. While pansexuals and bisexuals have some things in common, generally pansexuals see love as separate from gender, while bisexuals identify that they have attractions to both binary genders. Of course, if your friend would prefer to be called pansexual, you should respect that – they’re not the same thing!

10 Ignorant Things Bisexuals Are Tired Of Hearing

I hear a lot of talk about bisexual women, like they’re not a real thing – despite there being a definite part of the population that openly identifies as bisexual. Lesbians often think that either they’re “pretending” to like girls, or they’re “afraid” to come out as fully gay, and in certain contexts, that assumption makes sense – but only to the person who’s making the assumption. The bisexual woman will almost never agree with these assumptions, because they rely on stereotypes and misconceptions.

Many people in the gay community feel like coming out as bisexual would be the easier alternative, as opposed to coming out as gay, because “at least the woman would be able to use heterosexual privilege to their benefit” or some other such nonsense.

But, the truth is, bisexual women face their own unique set of complications when they come out. Bi erasure is a real thing, and most gay (and straight) people would rather pretend that it’s not possible to fall somewhere in the middle. Beyond that, many bisexual women face over-sexualization from both sides of the spectrum, and there are often assumptions that it’s all about sex.

The ironic thing is that, as lesbians, we are faced with many of the same types of discrimination that we, in turn, use against bi women. Most people don’t want to hear that they’re a hypocrite, though, so they pretend that it’s different if it’s a bisexual. The rules of common decency somehow don’t apply.

I have collected a list of things that bisexual women are absolutely sick of hearing – so strike them from your vocabulary, ASAP. Don’t even think about saying any of these things to a bi woman, or you deserve every bit of hostility it incites.


1. You only say you’re bi to be more attractive to men.

Yes, some men are attracted to bi girls. But that doesn’t mean that bisexuals are bi for them. The lines are a little fuzzy if the woman says she’s bi-curious, as some girls do question their sexuality in response to a partner’s requests, but generally speaking, if she says she’s bi, it’s because she knows, she’s bisexual. Don’t assume you know her better than she knows herself. She doesn’t have to prove anything to you, or anyone else.


2. You can’t be bi if you’ve never been with a girl.

This is one that we, as lesbians, often face personally: A lesbian virgin is assumed to be straight, and just hasn’t met “the right guy”. Or, a lesbian that’s been with many women (but no men) can’t possibly know that she’s not actually bisexual. Likewise, lesbians who have had sex with men – but maybe not with a woman – couldn’t possibly know that they’re not really bi… Right? Well, it’s just as wrong when it’s said to them as when it’s said to us. It is entirely possible (and quite likely) that she knows who she’s attracted to, whether she has acted on it or not.


3. Are you sure you’re not really gay?

This one is tough, because it’s something most bisexuals ask themselves when they first realize they’re attracted to the same sex. Society has conditioned people to think there are only two options – gay or straight – because most people fall into one of those two categories. But some people are genuinely attracted to both males and females – and this makes them bi. Not gay and in denial. Bi.


4. I bet I can fix that.

Whether this is said by a straight man trying to tip the scales, or a lesbian trying to tip the scales, you can’t fix a bi woman, because there’s nothing wrong with her. And now that you’ve made it sound like you think there’s something wrong with her, she’s definitely not going to let you get into her pants. No one likes having their identity questioned by someone else.


5. You just want to sleep with everyone.

Since bisexual women are attracted to both men and women, there’s an assumption that they’ll be attracted to all men and women – which simply isn’t true. As a lesbian, are you attracted to every female you meet? Chances are, you’re not – and most likely there’s an even smaller portion that you actually want to sleep with. It’s the same for bisexuals, except they’re open to men or women.


6. It’s just a phase.

Sometimes, sexuality is just a phase. But there is literally no way to tell if someone is going to “grow out of it” (not that that’s a very good way to put it), even if that person is yourself. If anything, bisexuals are the one group in the LGBT group that can’t be a phase – once you’ve been attracted to men and women, even those who now identify as straight or gay will be lumped into the bisexual group. (I still struggle with convincing my girlfriend that I am not, in fact, a bisexual, but rather a lesbian who spent some time confused – not that there’s anything wrong with bisexuals, I just know that’s not who I am.)


7. I wish I could be bi! (Wo)men are so annoying.

Well, in the definition that most people take, anyone can “be bi” – simply hook up with someone who is not of your preferred gender. But really, it’s a lot more than that. Just as lesbians can’t be straight (although many of us have tried) and some bi-curious individuals find out that they are, in fact, 100% definitely super straight, you can’t consciously change your sexuality – and to think you can just flip a switch when you’re tired of one gender is insulting and ridiculous. People are annoying – this is not a gender-specific problem.


8. You’re just confused – who you end up marrying will determine your real sexuality.

Fun fact: Marriage does not mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Even though most people are faithful in their marriages, that doesn’t mean that a bisexual will magically “become straight” or “become gay” depending on the gender of the person (or people) they eventually marry. A bisexual married to a man is still bisexual, just as a bisexual married to a woman is still bisexual. (Just like a “marriage of convenience” has never once changed a person’s orientation – just let that sink in for a minute.)


9. I don’t date bi girls, because they’ll cheat on me and/or leave me.

If a person is a cheater, you better believe that has nothing to do with their orientation. I’ve dated bi girls, and I’ve dated lesbians, and the number of them who cheated on me is actually about equal. (I think I’ve probably been with more lesbians who cheated on me with their exes – maybe that’s a stereotype we should explore?) The fact of the matter is, if a person is going to stray, they’re going to stray. Just because you perceive a bisexual as having more options with who to stray to doesn’t mean it’s more likely – it means you’re discriminating. (Note: It is okay to have preferences with who you date, but these preferences should not be based on assumptions and stereotypes.)


10. Since you’re bi, would you be interested in a threesome?

Listen. If you’re going to have a threesome, I say, that’s great for you – there’s a chance it could be a totally enjoyable experience for everyone involved. But that doesn’t mean that someone automatically wants to join in just because they’re interested in men and women. There are still factors that influence their attraction, and unless she happens to be attracted to you and your partner (and doesn’t have any moral objections to the idea of threesomes), she’s probably going to say no – and you can count on your friendship being awkward and strained after that.

Questions Gay People Have For Bisexual People

In this a new video from Buzzfeed, people identifying as gay sit down with people identifying as bisexual in order to better understand their unique position in the world.

From the treatment they experience at the hands of gays and lesbians in the larger spectrum of the queer community to the way that bisexuals are perceived by the world at large, these individuals unpack the complicated reality of bisexual identity in 2016.

“Bisexual women, specifically, get a lot of hate from the lesbian community because we get like labeled ‘greedy.”

So what are your burning questions bisexuals for bisexual people?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWVsMFpdBYU

Bi Erasure In Television Perfectly Summed Up In These Wonderful Memes

Are you tired of the straight-as-default trend in most media today? Are you tired of all queer subtext being read as gay or lesbian, but never bisexual? Then you are not alone.

Author and activist Nicole Kristal’s memes about bisexual TV characters hilariously point out, not a single one has used the word “bisexual” on screen.

Talking to Bustle, Kristal explained.

Labels are important because they create visibility and community, and they help dissolve shame.When you’re a minority group who cannot see a positive representation of yourself on television or in films, it’s damaging. It accounts for the horrific stats that have recently come out about bisexuals.”

In an effort to draw attention to bisexual erasure and its effect on individuals, Kristal created the #StillBisexual campaign last January, which features bisexuals discussing their sexuality and dating history in confessional-style videos.

I thought if people could see our bisexual stories, they would finally start to believe that we exist.

When bisexuality is depicted on television, it’s often shown as a transitional stop on the road to gay town …or as ambiguous and undefined. Characters almost never say the b word, especially not in reference to themselves, and often times their sexuality is used as a plot twist rather than a permanent identity.”

As a result, Kristal created memes featuring frustrated TV characters…

bi-memes-01

bi-memes-12 bi-memes-11 bi-memes-10 bi-memes-09 bi-memes-08 bi-memes-07 bi-memes-06 bi-memes-05 bi-memes-04 bi-memes-03 bi-memes-02

Couple Openly Discuss The Insecurities Faced When Dating A Bisexual Woman (Video)

Lynette & Corey, an engaged couple of four years, open up about their relationships and discuss the real struggles, and insecurities surrounding sexuality.

Corey, who is straight, finds it tough to imagine he is enough for Lynette, who is bisexual and has dated both men and women.

Lynette Corey 01

Their relationship has been both on and off, and during the off periods he was worried that she was using that time to date women and get with her ex-girlfriends.

What is interesting though, is he is not threatened by her dating other men, but if she still wants to see other women.

Even though Lynette says it ‘really isn’t an issue’, Corey still doesn’t understand.


Also read: 11 Real and Annoying Struggles Bisexual Woman In A Heterosexual Relationship Face


He wants to know if women were still a factor, because “it’s still present one way or the other.” In order to truly trust her, he wanted her to come clean about everything.

Lynette responded by saying sexuality can be fluid, and it’s not always black-and-white.

It’s a part of her life, and something she never wants to get in the way of her relationship with Corey.

She tells him

In my experience and I feel like several other people’s experiences, sexuality can be very fluid. There have been several instances where I’ve been attracted to this person. It’s caused me not only a lot of really fucked up hurt and stuff like that, because it’s so confusing.

I knew immediately when I met you that I choose this person. I didn’t know, a long time ago I thought I might end up with a woman. I was open to that a long time ago. But now after meeting you, I knew that wasn’t an issue anymore.

It wasn’t a case of, “Oh, that’s dead now”, but it’s “I choose you” and I wouldn’t do anything to fuck that up.”

The video is for The Skin Deep, a series of couples asking deep and honest questions in an effort to learn more about modern relationships.

Evan Rachel Wood Speaks Out On Bisexuality

In an interview with Esquire magazine back in 2011, True Blood star Evan Rachel Wood came out publicly as bisexual and since then has used her position of fame to blow up the negative and harmful discriminatory attitudes facing the bi-community.

Evan-Rachel-Wood-1

Last week, Wood took to Twitter in an active, honest and open conversation, which addressed the battles she’s faced with biphobia and depression.

Her educational, respectful, and enlightening tweets became very personal when she started discussing her own feelings about her place as a bisexual person in the LGBT community.

Inspired by her frank discussion of the topic, Nylon magazine reached out to the star to discuss the topic of bisexuality, bishame and biphobia, in a context that would allow more than 140 character answers.

Explaining that she’d spent years attempting to fit into a box that didn’t fit her, she found accepting her true self has been the key to happiness:

I realized I was happier when I just accepted myself. I stopped feeling like I had to prove my “queerness.” I knew who I was and that was enough. Also just noting that some people view the word queer as offensive. Some embrace it and identify with it. I always liked the word when it wasn’t being used in a derogatory way. So to be clear, I am using it in a non-derogatory sense.

Throughout the interview, Wood gives her interpretations of bisexuality, experimentation and pansexuality, saying that curiosity and forming long term relationships with multiple partners is not the same thing as identifying as bisexual.

Because for some, it is a gateway. Some people go through more of a transition, for whatever reason they feel. But just because you once identified as bisexual and now you identify as gay, doesn’t mean every bisexual is just “afraid to come all the way out.” Your experience is your experience. Period. I have a feminine side and a masculine side. I think I finally found a good marriage between the two. They have made peace with each other. When I am with a man, I am not straight. When I am with a woman, I am not gay. I am always bi. I am always me. I can’t “pick a side” or “shut one down.”

One is not better than the other. They are just different. The only choice I make is the choice to be happy by letting go and just being myself.”

Evan-Rachel-Wood-2

When asked how we can all work to be better allies, Evan shared:

Try not to judge someone before you really know their story. Be good to people who are good to you. And don’t let bad experiences with certain people taint your perception of an entire group of people. That’s how extreme points of view take over and bigotry is born.”

Definitely take the time to check out the whole interview right here. Once again, Evan Rachel Wood has really knocked some effective education out of the park.

11 Real and Annoying Struggles Bisexual Woman In A Heterosexual Relationship Face

So, it would appear that bisexuality is still confusing the hell out of everyone, especially when you’re a bi-women seeing a man.

If you’re with a man, you’re straight now. If you’re with a woman, that’s all you amount to — and it’s not just limiting, it’s false.

And it’s frustrating. And it makes you feel like all the identity you’ve worked so hard to own and embrace is getting squished.

It seems people still just don’t get bisexuality. And because of the confusion, bisexual people are forced to struggle with annoying situations.

Here are elven very real struggles bisexual women encounter.


1. Everyone assumes you’re “Straight Again” — Which would be fine, if “everyone” didn’t also include the people you’ve already come out to.

Struggles Bisexual 04


2. You get comments such as “I always knew you’d choose men…”

Struggles Bisexual 06


3. People ask if you’ve “Told them [your partner]” of your sexuality.

Struggles Bisexual 02


4. Assumptions, that you suddenly have heterosexual privilege.

Struggles Bisexual 10


5. Constantly being asked “But which do you like MORE; men or women?”

Struggles Bisexual 12


6. People assume your last same-sex relationship was just a phase.

Struggles Bisexual 01


7. People assume that you’ll be willing to cheat on your partner.

Struggles Bisexual 05


8. People asking how many threesomes you’ve had, before winking at you partner and trying to high-five them.

Struggles Bisexual 09


9. Realising your partner is more threatened by your old boyfriends than your old girlfriends.

Struggles Bisexual 11


10. Hearing the words “But I thought you were gay?” even though you’ve explained countless times you’re bi.

Struggles Bisexual 14


11. You feel completely erased from the LGBT spectrum (at least in lesbian communities eyes).

Struggles Bisexual 13

#StillBisexual Campaign Kicks Off Bisexual Visibility Week with Beautiful Videos

It’s Bisexual Visibility Week, so in honour the #StillBisexual campaign will post a new #StillBisexual for seven consecutive days.

The campaign features bi people telling their stories of coming out and finding love regardless of the gender of the person they find it with.

Here’s the first, from a very talented musician out of Brooklyn.and to kick it off this import week a series of amazing videos have been release by the excellent viral campaign #StillBisexual.


Also read: Evan Rachel Wood Has An Important Message About Her Bisexuality: ‘We Do Exist’


Have you liked us on Facebook?

Evan Rachel Wood Has An Important Message About Her Bisexuality: ‘We Do Exist’

Since coming out as bisexual in 2011, Evan Rachel Wood has been admirably outspoken about her sexuality.

LOS ANGELES, CA - NOVEMBER 01:  Actress Evan Rachel Wood attends the 2014 LACMA Art + Film Gala Honoring Barbara Kruger And Quentin Tarantino Presented By Gucci at LACMA on November 1, 2014 in Los Angeles, California.  (Photo by Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic)

LOS ANGELES, CA – NOVEMBER 01: Actress Evan Rachel Wood attends the 2014 LACMA Art + Film Gala Honoring Barbara Kruger And Quentin Tarantino Presented By Gucci at LACMA on November 1, 2014 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic)

In honor of Bisexual Awareness Week, which begins Sept. 20, she is shedding insight on the struggles faced within that community.

The actress took to Twitter to explain that, whether she is with a man or a woman, she is still bisexual.

Wildfang-campaign-08

Evan told a Twitter user.

Actually I am divorced with a son and no matter who I am with I am #stillbisexual.

I can assure you that whatever “straight privilege” I sometimes get accused of having, gets erased by #biphobia.

Remember, bisexuality doesn’t mean halfway between gay or straight. It is its own identity.”

Wood has been open about her bisexuality, and spit up with Jamie Bell last year after 19 months of marriage. She was previously engaged to Marilyn Manson.

evan_rachel_wood

She went on:

I think in some cases people don’t want to be labelled because they are ashamed to be bisexual. And this needs to stop. I have battled with myself most of my life because I wasn’t gay or straight enough. I used to think I would never be happy. #biphobia

I had to go through the same panic and shame and depression a lot of people in the LGBT community go through – but when I came out a new found shame took over. Bi-shame. Feeling like people are judging you all over again but for different reasons.”

The True Blood actress previously revealed that she “cried so hard” when she came out as bisexual to her mother.

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644633787687501824

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644635623047872512

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644636599171481600

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644639049869754369

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644639479022510081

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644639810640982016

https://twitter.com/evanrachelwood/status/644642242930446336

“So, are you still bisexual?” Yep Still Bisexual

#StillBisexual is a new viral campaign aimed at fighting the myth that bisexuals don’t stay bisexual.

A common question bisexuals people are asked regularly is “So, are you still bisexual?”, which is one of the most infuriating questions asked. So to combat this frustration people are telling their stories through video blogs and explain why, single or in a relationship, regardless of their partner’s gender, their bisexual identity doesn’t change. 

Also read: Figuring Out You’re Bisexual

Bisexual Women Myths Busted

You’ve probably heard a lot of stereotypes about bisexuality – the bastard stepchild of sexual orientations. Its something a lot gay and straight people struggle to figure out.

Most people can’t even agree on a definition of bisexuality, which has led to a lot of confusion, angst and prejudices.

bisexual-03

No one is really bisexual. It’s just a phase. They’re either gay and they can’t admit it, or they’re straight and they’re just experimenting. So, why can’t they make up their minds? Because you know, bisexuals can’t be trusted. They’ll just leave you for a man/woman.

They can’t be monogamous. They can’t be happy unless they’re sleeping with a man and a woman at the same time – bisexuals don’t have real relationships. They’re fun for a roll in the hay though.

Bisexual women are sleeping with the enemy. They are stealing lesbian energy and giving it to men. They just want heterosexual privilege. It’s easy to be bisexual because it’s chic.”

We’ve heard it all… so let bust that myth bubble once and for all.

bisexual-04