Tag Archives: same-sex equality

Gaybies: We Are Not a Hypothetical (Photo Series)

Right now, roughly 11% of gay adult men and 33% of gay adult women in Australia are raising children. And yet, while poll after poll showing the majority of Australians approve of same-sex marriage, Australia remains the only English-speaking country in the world not to have legalised it, with conservatives citing the same concern: the welfare of kids raised by two mums or two dads.

In all of this, filmmakers Maya Newell (herself raised by two mothers) and Charlotte Mars noticed one voice was crucially missing: the kids.

So over several years, they followed the lives of four children and their same-sex parents, and made the feature documentary Gayby Baby.

After seeing the documentary before its release, artist Casey Legler and photographer Jez Smith – in collaboration with the Gayby Baby team — spearheaded the photo series GAYBIES: We Are Not a Hypothetical, which showcases kids raised by same-sex parents — including several from the film.

Upon its Australian cinema release last week, however, Gayby Baby made headlines for all the wrong reasons. Conservative tabloid The Daily Telegraph published a front-page news story reporting that parents had objected to a scheduled school screening of the film. Soon after, The Guardian proved those reports were false. It didn’t matter: the New South Wales education minister banned the film from being screened during school hours.

The timing of Legler and Smith’s photo essay couldn’t be better. Now, after being told their families are “not normal” in the national press, three of the kids featured in Gayby Baby — Ebony, Gus and Matt — have spoken up, and the present-day photos have given them the opportunity to have their voices heard one more time.


Ebony, 16

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I’m in the film Gayby Baby, which started when I was 12, and I’m now 16. My brother Ashaan is now 5, Seth is 12 – oh gosh, he’s old! – and Makaya has just turned eight weeks. Ang is 40 this year and my mum is 36. I hear the words “gay agenda” all the time, and every time it makes me laugh. The only agenda my parents have is getting Makaya to sleep, or making sure we have done our homework, then getting our reports … and seeing we haven’t done our homework. I doubt this film has a gay agenda. It’s just us, and [filmmaker] Maya following us around for a few years. If my life has an agenda, then I’d like someone to explain that to me.

People can make assumptions about you and throw statistics at you and they can say all these things about you but in the end no knows your family but you.”


Seth, 12

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I have two mums. There’s also my sister Ebony, my little brother Ash, and my littlest brother Makaya. I found out my family was different in Year One. At my school you do Christian Scripture, and the only way not to go is you have to send an email to the principal. My parents didn’t know about that, so I went. We were a couple of weeks into it when they started to say, “If you have same-sex parents, or if you are gay, it’s a sin.” It was a shock and I was kind of confused. So I went home, Mum had a good long chat to the principal and Ang got me a bowl of ice cream. But yeah, that’s how I knew my family was different. But I’ve never really cared, ’cause my family is great. I’d rather my family is different and happy, than “normal” and not happy.

No matter what people say, don’t let it get you down. Just own it. If someone says your family is weird, just move on.”


Ashaan, 5

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I am Ashaan and I have two mums. On my birthday I get two things!


Jesse, 23

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My family consists of my two mothers – Louise and Margaret – my brother Raj, and my father Paul. What’s great about my family is that it is different, but at its core, it’s the same as everyone else’s. If Gayby Baby had been shown when I was at school, I wouldn’t have had to lie and make up stories about what my family was, and who that other woman living with us was. I could have been open and honest about myself and with my friends from the start. No one can ever discriminate against you if you are proud of yourself.

No one can ever discriminate against you if you are proud of yourself. You shouldn’t have to hide. Be yourself.”


Gus, 14

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My parents are Jen and Jamie, and I have a little sister, Rory. What’s great about my family is that they love me very much. They’re a pretty average family, but they are pretty daggy. When I woke up on Wednesday, my parents were pretty upset [by the Daily Telegraph front page], because the screening was suppose to be a step forward for the gay movement. But I was like, “Cool, I made the front page.”

Just try not to listen to the rich white politicians and love your family. Don’t blame them for anything, cause despite what everyone thinks — it’s not a choice.”


Vivienne, 10

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I have three mums – Fiona, Jam and Gina – a brother called Bruno who is very annoying, a cat called Jasper, and another a cat called Flash who lives with six Spiny Leaf Stick insects. What I like about my mums is that they are completely different.

One is tough and is a blacksmith, my other mum works for Women NSW and my other mum is a writer. At school, sometimes people say “that’s gay’ or they call people gay. I try and stop them but they just keep doing it. The other day, even one of my best friends said, “That’s so gay,” and I was like, “That is extremely rude.”

Stand up for what you believe in and don’t let them bring you down.”


Rory, 8

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My family is like every family. There are some bad things and some good things. I felt half happy because Gus was on the front page of the newspaper, but half sad because they were being mean to people with gay and lesbian families. The people who disagree with it have not watched the film. If they watch Gayby Baby, they will know that everyone is the same, because all families have their differences.

Everyone is the same because all families have their differences.”


Brenna, 19

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When I was eight, me and my parents went on an episode of [Australian children’s TV show] Play School . Parents complained, so controversy is something I am very used to. Even though it’s been really yuck to see homophobia given airtime, it has shown that there is a lot of support for gay and lesbian families too. Watching Gayby Baby, I realised I had never seen my family on screen in all those complex ways. I felt an enormous sense of pride.

I want kids who are growing up with same-sex parents to know that you understand diversity, acceptance and love more than most fully grown adults.”


Dylan, 13 and Matt, 16

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Dylan: I have two mums who are married, a dad, a soon-to-be step mum, a brother and a stepsister. My mums got married in New Zealand, then came to Australia for the reception. It was really fun. My brother and I made speeches, danced down the aisle and did the first dance. To other kids in families like mine, I’d say, just remember that you are just like every other family, but you’re better, ’cause you have two of them. Be proud of it.

Matt: My mums wanted to get married in Australia but it’s illegal. They were going to wait until they legalised it, but that was going to take too long, so they went to New Zealand. It wasn’t the best, ’cause they had to go overseas and none of their friends could be with them. But then they came back and had a wedding reception and that was really fun. People are saying Gayby Baby is political and shouldn’t be shown in schools, but it’s just showing kids like me who have gay parents that it’s alright.


Sunnai, 16

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I have two mums, a donor dad, and another mum that lives in Melbourne. I’ve been in the [Sydney Gay and Lesbian] Mardi Gras since I was zero. When I was four, the theme for the rainbow kids was The Wizard of Oz.Mum, Lil and I all dressed up as the Tin Man and we painted our bodies silver. It was one of the best Mardi Gras I’ve ever been in. My advice to younger kids? Acknowledge that you are different. Because who wants to be normal? Normal is so boring.

Who wants to be normal? Normal is so boring. Being different is so special; you are brought up with so much love and acceptance.”

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New South Wales Premier ‘Distressed’ After Backing Ban On Same-Sex Parenting Film

Mike Baird, the Premier in New South Wales in Australia has apologised, and said he was “distressed” after he backed ban on showing of a same-sex parenting film.

Burwood Girls High in Sydney planned on screening the film Gayby Baby to students last Friday morning as part of “Wear it Purple” day – a equality campaign aimed at encouraging LGBT inclusion and support in schools.

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However, the film was banned from being shown during school hours, by New South Wales’ education minister Adrian Piccoli.

State Premier Mike Baird backed the move:

I understand the intent of that is to provide an example of tolerance and that’s something I absolutely support. Should it be in class time? No, I don’t think so. Should it be optional? Yes, I do think so.”

Upper house Labor MP Penny Sharpe brought up the controversy at a budget estimate on Thursday.

She said she had heard from a gay parent who said she felt the government’s action on the film had sent a message to her kids that they were not normal.

The letter read

I want to cry because although I know our child is ever so loved and balanced and sensible, and fully supported as an emerging young person in their own right, I can’t really know what this does to them. I am outraged at the media, but more at the damage made so much greater with a government affirmation and intervention that ensured that the message of `unacceptable’, `not normal’, and `tacitly deviant, therefore worth less’ was slammed full force, without consideration, consultation or care, into the minds of children and families throughout the state.”

Mr Baird responded to say that he had been “very distressed by the way this played out.”

I have to say to her that I’m incredibly sorry. Everyone – every single person – has value. Everyone is normal. The last thing I want is for any family to not feel loved and accepted across NSW.”

Gayby Baby is a documentary, which tells the stories of children of same-sex parented families. Sydney filmmakers Maya Newell and Charlotte McLellan raised $100k to make the film through crowdfunding in 2012.

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As the daughter of two mothers, Newell hoped to change the minds of those who believe same-sex parenting is detrimental to children and ultimately her goal is to bring gay marriage to reality. The documentary is told from the perspectives of the three such ‘gaybies’ to see what it’s really like to grow up in such a family.

Australian Film Maker Challenges The Perception of Same-Sex Parenting

A brand new Australian documentary film is coming soon –  Gayby Baby – which tells the stories of children of same-sex parented families.

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In Gayby Baby we meet four kids – Gus, Ebony, Matt and Graham – whose parents all happen to be gay. As they each wrestle with the onset of puberty, the outside world wrestles with the issue of marriage equality, and whether or not kids of same-sex families are at risk.

Sydney filmmakers Maya Newell and Charlotte McLellan raised $100k to make the film through crowdfunding in 2012.

As the daughter of two mothers, Newell hopes to change the minds of those who believe same-sex parenting is detrimental to children and ultimately her goal is to bring gay marriage to reality. We’re in the midst of what Newell likes to call a ‘Gayby-Boom’ with fifteen percent of homosexual couples raising a child – amounting to millions of children across the globe. The documentary will be told from the perspectives of the three such ‘gaybies’ to see what it’s really like to grow up in such a family.

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Newell explains

“I am a ‘gayby’ – a person with gay parents. I want to tell the story of children growing up in families like mine. When I was a kid, there were not many other children with gay parents. I would have loved to be able to watch a film and feel that my experiences were shared. So I decided to make that film.”

Maya Newell

The release of Gayby Baby follows Newell’s Growing Up Gayby, a 2013 documentary on the same subject which screened on the ABC in 2013.

The documentary will be having its World Premiere at Hot Docs Film Festival in Toronto, Canada next month, and we’ll let you know when screenings are happening here.

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The official website for Gayby Baby will soon be updated with lots more information. See it here.

New Italian TV Ad from Vodafone Features a Lesbian Family

“It is time to have courage” – a new TV advert from Vodafone is creating a stir. Playing the role of an expecting father, a woman waits eagerly in hospital waiting room. She then enters a room to embrace her partner and their newborn son. Vodafone modernisation.

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To open the video an actor says:

“Bisogna avere pazienza, ci vuole tempo, dobbiamo fare un passo alla volta. Ma magari invece no. Magari invece è arrivata l’ora di avere coraggio.”

Which roughly means…

“Be patient, it takes time. We must take one step at a time. But maybe not. Maybe instead it’s time to have courage.”

All though very PG, the scene is a big-step in the right direction for a country, which sometimes struggles to support same-sex unions.

Missouri Stepping Closer to Lift on Same-Sex Marriage Ban

A judge struck down part of Missouri’s gay marriage ban for the first time by ordering the state to recognize same-sex marriages legally performed in other states, saying state laws banning the unions single out gay couples “for no logical reason.”

The order means such couples will be eligible to sign up for a wide range of tax, health insurance, veterans and other benefits now afforded to opposite-sex married couples. Missouri Attorney General Chris Koster, who has defended the state’s ban on gay marriage, said his office was reviewing the ruling.

The decision comes in a lawsuit filed by 10 same-sex couples who legally married outside the state, including Arlene Zarembka and Zuleyma Tang-Martinez. The St. Louis couple, who married in Canada, said Friday’s ruling could boost their household income, and they plan to apply Monday for Zarembka to receive Social Security benefits as Tang-Martinez’s spouse.

“To me, it’s a real validation by the judge of our relationship and our commitment to each other.”

Tang-Martinez

Jackson County Circuit Judge J. Dale Youngs sided with the couples, who argue that their rights to equal protection and due process are being violated by Missouri’s ban on gay marriage. Youngs said the couples deserve the same recognition as opposite-sex couples who married in other states.

Jackson County Circuit Judge J. Dale Youngs wrote…

“The undisputed facts before the Court show that, to the extent these laws prohibit plaintiffs’ legally contracted marriages from other states being recognized here, they are wholly irrational, do not rest upon any reasonable basis, and are purely arbitrary. All they do is treat one segment of the population – gay men and lesbians – differently than their same-sex counterparts, for no logical reason.”

The lawsuit before Youngs only challenges Missouri’s refusal to recognize marriages legally performed outside the state, not laws that bar same-sex couples from getting married in Missouri.

The American Civil Liberties Union, which is helping the couples, noted the ruling was a first in the state.

“We’re gratified that the court recognized that married same-sex couples and their families are no different than other couples, and that the Constitution requires them to be treated equally. This is not the first court to reach this conclusion, but it is the first court to do so in Missouri, so it’s a tremendous day for our state.”

Tony Rothert

Rothert also said the ruling means that thousands of Missouri couples can now qualify for spousal government benefits and, on a smaller level, change their last names to match their spouse’s on their Missouri driver’s license.

The case is among at least three challenging Missouri’s ban: There is a federal challenge in Kansas City, and a St. Louis case focuses on city officials who issued marriage licenses to four same-sex couples to trigger a legal test of the ban.

The lawsuits are based on the same arguments that led the U.S. Supreme Court last year to overturn part of the federal Defense of Marriage Act that denied a tax, health and other benefits to legally married gay couples.

In Missouri, Youngs said he expects the state Supreme Court to “provide the last word on all of the important legal issues presented by this case.”

Same-sex marriage is now legal in 19 states and the District of Columbia. The ACLU has cases pending against 13 other states with such bans, including five cases currently before federal appeals courts.

Republican Support for Gay Marriage to Increase as Aggressive Lobbying Efforts Take Place

The topic of same-sex marriage is no longer a non-issue. It could have been, some years ago, when people were less in tune to the neglect of human rights surrounding LGBTQ people and when support for same-sex marriage was significantly lower.

However, in just a few short years, support for the social issue has skyrocketed, in part helped by endorsements from current US President, Barack Obama and other high profile celebrity figures.

Furthermore, lobbying by marriage equality groups have also pushed at every step of the way, making same sex marriage supported by most. On the right wing Republican side of things however, there is still reluctance to support it but with further campaigning by advocacy groups, that could be set to change.

Word of change comes from groups like Young Conservatives for Freedom to Marry who have launched a national grassroots campaign specifically targeting Republican activists in key presidential nominating states (swing states) that have a particular effect on the presidential vote.

In making these states become more in favour of same sex marriage, there’s hope that the presidential nominee campaigning in the region will have to support same sex marriage if not because they believe in human rights for all but just for the purely selfish reason of wanting to garner votes.

Tyler Deaton, campaign manager at Young Conservatives for Freedom to Marry has explained that they aren’t looking necessarily for people to outright support it but just to see that “it’s a valid point of view.” However despite these reasonable goals, they are hoping that more people will support same sex marriage ahead of the 2016 Republican convention. That’s almost two entire years away but as the official Republican party line is “the union of one man and one woman must be upheld as the national standard,” anything that can be done to soften that opinion should be seen as a good thing.

Top 10 Wedding Stats on Same-Sex Weddings and LGBT Nuptials

To commemorate Pride Month, the striking down of same-sex marriage bans, and the anniversary of the overturn of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), TheKnot.com and The Advocate, announced the results of their second annual same-sex wedding survey.

The study looked at many aspects of weddings, from the engagement ring to the honeymoon, comparing the traditions that same-sex couples are following in their wedding ceremonies with those of their straight counterparts.

Top 10 Wedding Stats on Same-Sex Weddings and LGBT Nuptials 

  1. It is our wedding – 82% of same-sex couples refer to this occasion as their wedding in invitations, up from 70% in 2013.
  2. We go all-out – Over 70% of same-sex couples will have a ceremony and reception, as opposed to 96% of straight couples. 12% of same-sex couples will only have a ceremony, and 7% of couples are planning to simply host a reception.
  3. Its not always about the size of the diamond – Proposing with a ring is not as common for same-sex couples, with about 2 out of 3 couples (62%) exchanging an engagement ring before or after the proposal.
  4. Its about teamwork – When it comes to wedding attire, nearly all (91%) of same-sex couples know what their partner is wearing in advance, with 49% of male same-sex couples and 20% of female same-sex couples wearing matching outfits. As a nod to customary wedding wear, 42% of both female and male same-sex couples are wearing a suit or tuxedo as their wedding day attire.
  5. The “walk down the aisle” – Less than half of same-sex couples did or plan to walk down the aisle. Of those couples, 59% of female same-sex couples will be escorted by a family member, along with 37% of male same-sex couples. However, 40% percent of male same-sex couples and 30% of female same-sex couples plan to walk down the aisle together.
  6. Its about us – 63% of straight couples are more likely to tie religion into their ceremony, while only 38% of same-sex couples will incorporate religion.
  7. We’re romantic – Nearly half (49%) of same-sex couples write their own vows, compared to about one in four straight couples.
  8. Its not always tradition – In a more traditional move, 79% of straight brides will change their last name to the groom’s last name, while 54% of same-sex couples will keep their given last names.
  9. We’re not cheap – Although same-sex couples are spending less on average ($15,849) on their weddings than straight couples ($29,858), they’re having more intimate affairs with less guest and still investing just as much on their guests, with an average spend of $205 per head.
  10. We pay our way – When it comes to finances, 85% of same-sex couples are paying for their wedding themselves, compared with only 13% of straight couples.

Luxembourg Passes Equal Marriage Bill by a Landslide

In a historical move Luxembourg’s parliament overwhelmingly passed a same-sex marriage bill, by a vote of 56-4. The new bill introduces equal marriage, in addition to granting adoption rights to same-sex couples.

“Gay people should have the same rights as heterosexuals. With this law, we do not throw overboard all the values ​​of our society. All we have done is give equal rights to gay people. We formally recognize a form of relationship that has always existed.”

Viviane Loschetter, MP

Luxembourg’s parliament has only one chamber, and so the vote by the Chamber of Deputies has secured the passage of the bill as a whole.
According to the Chamber of Deputies, the law is expected to be in force by early 2015.

The only MPs to vote against the bill were Gaston Gibéryen, Fernand Kartheiser and Roy Reding, all of the right-wing Alternative Democratic Reform Party, and Aly Kaes, who was rebelling against the Christian Social People’s Party.

Last year, Luxembourg made history as the first country to have an openly gay Prime Minister and an openly gay Deputy Prime Minister at the same time.

“We commend the leaders of Luxembourg for granting the nation’s LGBT citizens the rights they deserve, and we congratulate the LGBT activists and advocates who made this historic day possible.”

Ty Cobb, Human Rights Campaign

Luxembourg will be the 9th EU country to introduce same-sex marriage, following the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Sweden, Portugal, Denmark, France and England and Wales in the U

WWE teams up with NOH8 campaign to send clear message

As a closeted wrestling fan, it warmed my heart to see the WWE team up with the NOH8 campaign to send a clear message of support for LGBT Community and same-sex equality. A number of stars (Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, Darren Young and others) from the pro wrestling company appeared in Adam Bouska’s serial photo project stemming from the frustration he and partner Jeff Parshley felt when Prop 8 was passed in California.

“Our mission at WWE is to put smiles on people’s faces and we do that, in part, by participating in initiatives that help fight bullying of all kinds. We are proud to support the LBGT community by taking part in the WWE NOH8 campaign.”

Stephanie McMahon, Chief Brand Officer, WWE

WWE superstar Darren Young, who came out publicly as gay last year, is thrilled to see the WWE embrace equality.

“I am so honored to be a part of the WWE NOH8 campaign. The most important thing is to be able to live your life the way you want to, truthfully. NOH8 makes that possible.”

They’re promoting their participation on social media with #WWENOH8.

“NOH8 Campaign was proud to team up with the WWE in breaking new ground in the fight against bullying and discrimination and supplementing the work WWE has done with projects like Be A Star. When WWE Superstar Darren Young came out a few months back, WWE defined what it meant to be an ally when their executives, superstars, and divas came out in support of one of their own. To hear they wanted to get involved with NOH8 to further broadcast that support.”

Bouska and Parshley  NOH8 founders,in a statement to Outsports.

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