Tag Archives: Stereotypes

Study Finds Slight Shift In Attitudes Toward Bisexuals, From Negative To Neutral

While positive attitudes toward lesbians and gay men have increased, a new study – led by researchers at IU’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion – shows attitudes toward bisexual men and women are relatively neutral, if not ambivalent.

The study, which is only the second to explore attitudes toward bisexual men and women, was led by Brian Dodge, associate professor in the Department of Applied Health Science and associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University’s School of Public Health-Bloomingtom.

He said,

While recent data demonstrates dramatic shifts in attitude (from negative to positive) toward homosexuality, gay/lesbian individuals and same-sex marriage in the U.S., most of these surveys do not ask about attitudes toward bisexuality or bisexual individuals. And many rely on convenience sampling strategies that are not representative of the general population of the U.S.”

The study looked at five negative connotations, found in previous studies, associated with bisexual men and women, including the idea that they are confused or in transition regarding their sexual orientation, that they are hypersexual and that they are vectors of sexually transmitted diseases.

The research showed that a majority of male and female respondents, more than one-third, were most likely to “neither agree nor disagree” with the attitudinal statements. In regard to bisexual men and women having the capability to be faithful in a relationship, nearly 40% neither agreed nor disagreed.

Those who identified as “other” had the most positive attitudes toward bisexuality, followed by gay/lesbian respondents and then heterosexuals.

Age played a factor in the results, with participants under the age of 25 indicating more positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women. Income and education also played a role: Higher-income participants were more likely to report more positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women, in addition to participants with higher levels of education.

Overall, attitudes toward bisexual women were more positive than attitudes toward bisexual men.

While our society has seen marked shifts in more positive attitudes toward homosexuality in recent decades, our data suggest that attitudes toward bisexual men and women have shifted only slightly from very negative to neutral. That nearly one-third of participants reported moderately to extremely negative attitudes toward bisexual individuals is of great concern given the dramatic health disparities faced by bisexual men and women in our country, even relative to gay and lesbian individuals.”

Bisexual men and women face a disproportionate rate of physical, mental and other health disparities in comparison to monosexuals—those who identify as exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual, Dodge said. Although research has not determined the cause, Dodge said that negative attitudes and stigma associated with bisexuality could play a role.

Data from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior shows that approximately 2.6% of adult men and 3.6% of adult women in the U.S. identify as bisexual. For females, that number is more than double the number of women who identify as lesbian, 0.9%. When it comes to adolescents, 1.5% of male adolescents (age 14 to 17) and 8.4% of female adolescents identify as bisexual.

Dodge said he hopes the results emphasize the need for efforts to decrease negative stereotypes and increase acceptance of bisexual individuals as a component of broader initiatives aimed at tolerance of sexual and gender minority individuals.

After documenting the absence of positive attitudes toward bisexual men and women in the general U.S. population, we encourage future research, intervention and practice opportunities focused on assessing, understanding and eliminating biphobia—for example, among clinicians and other service providers—and determining how health disparities among bisexual men and women can be alleviated.”

Why Do We Hold On To Misogynistic Ideas Even Though We Are Women?

One of the first and most important things I learnt when I got into feminism was to give a name to one of its enemies, and find out that many of my own behaviours were linked to it: this enemy is internalized misogyny and it means the way we have been taught by society to think of our own gender as inferior.

Internalized misogyny can be demonstrated through ‘girl hate’ (the bitter feelings we may often have for other women – jealousy, antagonism, a tendency to undermine them or differentiate ourselves from their group), prejudices that concern stereotypically ‘female traits’, or even feelings of inferiority about our own selves because of our gender.

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The point is that we can hold unintentionally misogynistic ideas even though we are women. Most of us, especially as we become more aware, start recognizing behaviours and opinions that we used to hold and are caused by internalized misogyny. That doesn’t mean we can’t grow out of them and mature. It happens partly because that’s how we’ve been taught to perceive most accomplished women around us, and it’s something that I’ve drastically changed the way I see it nowadays.

But which are the most common behaviours, ideas, and perceptions for ourselves and for the women around us that are caused by internalized misogyny?

Trying to exclude/differentiate myself from (groups of) other women.

One of the most common ways internalized misogyny can be demonstrated, is through our constant effort to exclude ourselves from the wider concept of our gender and of society’s perception of it, in order to feel superior than what we’re taught a woman is. Throughout my childhood and adolescence girls were my best friends who supported my through everything and boys were my bullies. However, I still prided myself to be ‘not like other girls’ (sometimes including my friends who I deemed as cool and intelligent in this special ‘different’ troupe) and I remember boasting that I thought and acted like a boy. I saw most women as the enemy, being too anxious to diminish their worth in my head because they put on too much makeup or they stuffed their bras, things that I undoubtedly did myself.

I wrote Harry Potter fanfiction my entire life – and no one has yet declared this period over. I always wrote male voices (mostly Sirius and Remus’), even though Tonks – a brave, strong, colourful warrior, lover, and mother who broke the gender norms – was my favorite character. The reason I didn’t choose to write her point of view that often, even though she was that cool of a role model, is because I remember boasting how hard it was for me to capture the voice of a woman – although I identified as one – and how I can work with the way a man thinks best. My best friend had affirmed that, sure, my mind worked more like a man’s than like a woman’s. Both of us, for what is called internalized misogyny, thought at that point that this was the best compliment she could pay me ever.

All that makes sense: The mass-media with which millenials have grown up, even in their progressive versions, have been showing us caricatures of women, telling them that they should know their place in life. We’re told that women are too sensitive, functioning more with feelings than with logic and common sense (actually that bit has strategically been built up for centuries), that we’re too hard to understand, that we’re too much ‘bitchiness’ and drama, but maybe it just looks this way because our ideas, needs and demands to be treated as equals are rarely even heard. Not to mention trans women, who are 90% of the time depicted horribly stereotypically, and are the butts of the joke in most movies. Nothing can be more harmful than that. These are stereotypes that completely ignore the fact that women are not, after all, a homogenous group. Apart from some exceptions, women are taught by society that they’re worthless and that, as a result, the only way to achieve something in life, is to prove that they’re the least worthless of their group.

Degrading others to climb up somewhere yourself comes like a survival plan, and this is just horrible, because girls are awesome. When I took off my internalized misogyny glasses, I started realizing that brilliant, interesting, diverse girls are not the exceptions, but they’re everywhere around me, they’re often better than me, and I should learn to take them as role models and cherish their friendship instead of making a competition out of it.

Blaming other women for my oppression.

So what happens is that we as women are taught that, with all those horrible traits society thinks we possess, other women are to blame for the bad things that happen to us. When the girl or the boy we fancy in high school fancies another girl, it’s her fault for being too promiscuous or ‘fake’, and when our boss is a woman she’s not ‘strong and determined’, but ‘bossy and a bitch’. We slut shame, we grow hostile, jealous and competent of each other, denying ourselves friendship and comradeship, because you can’t be friends with the person you subconsciously think you are competing with.

Projecting those ideas of inferiority on myself.

Even after we realize how strange it was to be so hostile towards Kirsten Stewart as we grew up (plus after getting a crush on her), there are some things that are caused by internalized misogyny and are still too hard to brush off. We often fail to recognize our value, or how good we are in things we do, sometimes even getting the feeling that we don’t deserve the recognition we get about them, that we didn’t achieve anything that important, or that we achieved it by mistake, by luck, or by fooling each other. I have felt guilty for being congratulated for my work many times. That is called imposter syndrome, and it sucks, because men are taught by a young age to know their worth, while we may even feel the need to apologize to our professors or co-workers for potentially having fooled them into thinking they’re better than we are.

Convincing myself that I don’t deserve every good thing I get because I’m a woman…

That can go to great extents. I mean, it can even be demonstrated as the underlying assumption that I don’t deserve my partner giving effort to please me during sex, that they’re doing me a favour when, for example, I take too much time.

…or that I deserve the unpleasant things that can occur if I don’t meet up to the expectations set up for women by our society.

When I was in high school I had a fashion blog that my bully classmates found and sent me comments which were awful, disgusting and definitely things that a boy wouldn’t hear that easily. I didn’t have the choice to pose wearing my DIY shirts and owl bags with my slightly pretentious sixteen year-old ‘model’ face in my personal blog, without being slut-shamed, ridiculed and harassed online, only to have the professor I went to in shock, to tell me that I had practically signed up for my harassment the moment I made these pictures public.

Last year I decided that I liked hair on me. Not necessarily to make a statement – even though I don’t regret making one. I just happened to start preferring my body with its natural hair – everywhere. So I stopped shaving. Since then, most shocked and patronizing comments have come from my family, but the fact that friends, classmates and strangers on the street may have, until recently, been silent about it, doesn’t mean that I don’t get weird, even offended looks all the time. I’m more used to it now, and I laughed when I realized these girls on the bus were discussing my leg hair with horror, but I used to be much more self-conscious about it.

A couple of weeks ago I learnt from a guy from school, that his sister – to whom I haven’t talked in about five years – knows and has discussed my leg hair from another classmate that goes to my university. We don’t communicate with that girl at all, we barely say hi once every semester, yet she thought that my leg hair was that big of a deal that she should discuss it with people who probably don’t even remember what my face looks like. Why do they have to make me feel bad about a choice that has to do with my body, just because that choice doesn’t meet up with what a woman is supposed to do to meet society’s unrealistic, problematic beauty standards? Why does every family member and passer-by on the street feel they have the right to stare at me, an already self-conscious person, with eyes wide open in surprise? What made it okay for them to stare until I feel like I have done something bad?

People have learnt that they have been given the holy right to police personal choices that have to do with my body or my appearance just because I’m a woman, and that I am to blame if I think that sucks.

Internalized misogyny, homophobia, biphobia, and transphobia, are mechanisms of self-blame and degradation caused by the social discourse that labels some identities as inferior to others.

It surely takes time and effort, but we need to actively fight against those mechanisms, in order to be able to support, not only others against the oppression they face because of their identity, but also ourselves.

Has Misogyny in the Gay Community Become an Epidemic?

When we think about the unrealistic expectations set for women, we often overlook the actions of gay men. After all, they’re not sexually attracted to women, so that means they most likely aren’t going to judge us based on our attractiveness. Likewise, they’re used to being in a position of minority, so they’re less likely to hold us into our little box. Right?

Well, not necessarily. According to Séan Faye of Broadly, gay men might even be more sexist and misogynistic than their straight male counterparts – and it’s almost worse, because it’s not coming from a desire to claim the women involved, but rather, to be more powerful than them.

Think about it. When’s the last time you were inappropriately groped by a gay man, whether as a joke or out of curiosity? Many gay men forget the general rules of personal boundaries, and may grab a woman’s breast or bum without even asking first. It’s generally regarded as not sexual in nature, so it isn’t seen as a problem.

But that doesn’t make it okay.

In some ways, this may be a retaliation. Lesbians often subscribe to feminism, so it’s assumed that we would embody the “femi-nazi” stereotype of the man-haters. This would, naturally, upset the balance in the gay community – unless, of course, the gay men retaliated by being woman-haters, too. But it’s important to realize that not all women believe in female superiority – and in fact, most are just looking for equality.

But gay men aren’t the only ones guilty of this misogyny, either – I’ve seen in in my lesbian friends as well. We make sexist assumptions about each other all the time, and it’s really not fair. I’ve even caught myself doing it before – reposting pictures that fall outside of what I find attractive, with captions that would seriously hurt if the person in the picture were to read them.

Is it right? Definitely not.

Is it something we all need to work on? Yeah, I think so.

Is it something that’s going to happen any time soon? Well, probably not.

The truth is, any big movement is going to be hard to coordinate, and I don’t think the world is really ready to accept true gender equality. Maybe we never will be – being part of a patriarchal society for so long has most of us pretty set in our ways. Even those of us who consider ourselves feminists are subject to occasional bouts of woman-hating-ness, whether we outwardly vocalize them or not.

What can you do to fix it in your own local community?

If we’re being completely honest here, there’s not a lot that can be done to fix it on a wide scale – each person would have to change their own behavior, and in time the “old ways” of doing things will die out. Maybe I’m a pessimist, but I don’t see it happening in my lifetime.

On a smaller scale, though, we can actively work to suppress our anti-feminist thoughts, by stopping to think before we say things that could be taken a negative way. Sure, this won’t actually fix the problem, but it’ll help you to acknowledge the “bad” behavior and put an end to it.

Some feminists would prefer to think that you can dismantle the patriarchy simply by defying the traditional gender roles… But I don’t think that’s necessary, nor is it the only way to do things. If you truly like the things that are traditionally attributed to your gender, perhaps the most feminist thing you could do is to be unapologetically yourself – even if it goes along with what society expects of you. Isn’t it more important to be real than to be novel?

The only way we’re going to fix this is if we all stand up against the expectations – all expectations. Don’t expect anything from anyone based on things you aren’t sure of. Stereotypes aren’t always right, but even if they are, that doesn’t mean that the person is necessarily sacrificing themselves, their dignity, or their self-respect.

In short, the best way to beat misogyny is to stop caring what everyone else thinks about you- and stop assuming everyone cares what you think, too.

Straight Men And Women Attempt To Figure Out The Meaning Of Gay Slang

Bustle have created a video that invites straight men and women to guess the meaning of common gay slang. Why, so we queer folk can laugh at the hetros being silly.
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The video provides the “contestants” (if you will) with a term, and after a good period of watching them fail miserably at guessing the meaning, the answer is revealed.

The Ultimate List Of Lesbian Clichés & Stereotypes

So what are the go-to lesbian stereotypes these days?

As many of us know, all queer women conform to a specific set of rules and regulations on everything from dress to sexual activity to emotions.

These are instinctive rules not taught in school. They’re life rules.

So in the interest of helping our dear readers, we’ve decided to make those queer rules public.

Take them out of the closet, if you will. Give you a fall break-down of all the clichés & stereotypes you’ll need to address.

Dress Code (Unless The Lesbian Is The Femme)

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  1. Appropriate footwear: Birkenstocks, Airwalks, chucks, Doc Martens or sports sandals. Socks are never optional.
  2. Make-up: not allowed.
  3. Undergarments: Bras are frowned upon.
  4. Appropriate tops: flannel, more flannel, folksy prints and Polar fleece.
  5. Appropriate bottoms: jeans, cords, jean shorts or walking shorts.
  6. “Hygiene”: Shaving of armpits or legs is frowned upon.
  7. Accessories may include: Nalgene bottles; carabiners; keys at your belt; fanny packs; femme lesbians who only dress girly for the attention or to get a real man.

Lifestyle Attributes

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  1. Appropriate automobiles: Saabs, pickup trucks, Subaru Outbacks, Jeep Wranglers, Xterras, Mini Coopers and Volvos.
  2. Pop cultural influences: Melissa Etheridge; Ani DiFranco; Indigo Girls; and The L Word. No exceptions.
  3. Pets: At least one cat, and preferably more.
  4. Food: Vegetarians preferred
  5. Colleges/alma maters: Smith; Bryn Mawr; Mount Holyoke; and Wellesley.
  6. Partner choices: Recruiting straight women preferred.
  7. Career choices: P.E. teacher; basketball player; softball player; and professional golfer.

Psychology

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  1. Oedipal Complex: Hatred of fathers, except when they over-identify with them.
  2. Childhood Obsessions: Monkeys as pets.
  3. Adult Obsessions: Hating men.
  4. Penis Envy: Yes.
  5. Desire for motherhood: No.

Sex & Relationships

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  1. Onset of lesbianism: College — until graduation, in some cases.
  2. Conversion: Lesbians can be converted with one internal application of human penis.
  3. Madonna/Whore Complex: Many are technically virgins, because they’ve never gotten down with a dude.
  4. Roles: Every lesbian relationship has a butch and a femme.
  5. Timing: Lesbians move in together on the second date.
  6. Sex: Once two lesbians move in together, they will never have sex again.
  7. Break Ups: Bunny boiling provides the maximum drama all lesbians require.

So is the anything more to add, ladies? Leave a comment in the box below.

 

Study Concludes That Gaydar Isn’t A Real Thing, Just Us Stereotyping

The concept is not only inaccurate, it also encourages dangerous stereotypes, research suggests.

Scientists at the University of Wisconsin-Madison conducted the study to challenge the so-called “gaydar myth” in a new paper recently published in the Journal of Sex Research.
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Researchers found that although many view the idea as harmless, it is actually still stereotyping – just in a more subtle form.

William Cox, lead author of the paper.

Most people think of stereotyping as inappropriate. But if you’re not calling it ‘stereotyping,’ if you’re giving it this other label and camouflaging it as ‘gaydar’, it appears to be more socially and personally acceptable.”

Cox proved this theory by splitting the study’s participants into three groups. One was told that the concept is real and another that gaydar is nothing more than stereotyping.

They were then shown photos of men and a statement about their interests.

Make sure to read: Women Explain The Science Behind Gaydar

The group that was led to believe gaydar is real were much more like to make assumptions based on traditional stereotypes – such as “he likes shopping”, or “his is emotionally sensitive”.

Cox argues.

If you tell people they have a gaydar, it legitimises the use of those stereotypes.”

Another reason gaydar is often misused, Cox said, was because LGBT people still make up such a small percentage of the population.

Imagine that 100% of gay men wear pink shirts all the time, and 10% of straight men wear pink shirts all the time. Even though all gay men wear pink shirts, there would still be twice as many straight men wearing pink shirts. So – even in this extreme example – people who rely on pink shirts as a stereotypic cue to assume men are gay will be wrong two-thirds of the time.”

Previous surveys have differed in result, with some insisting that the “gay sixth sense” does indeed exist.

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Question: Can You Tell If Someone’s Gay?

Can you spot the lone lesbian in roomful of straight women? Can you tell if someone’s gay? Is your gaydar finally tuned?

Hmmm, is it that easy? Can you look at someone and know if they are gay, bisexual, straight, pansexual… and so on?

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Make sure to read: Women Explain The Science Behind Gaydar

 

Women Explain The Science Behind Gaydar

It’s been said you can’t judge a book by its cover, but in our gay world there is this crazy little thing called ‘Gaydar’.

The idea of ‘Gaydar’ is that we gay people are highly accurate at detecting other gay people.

Hmmm, is it that easy? Can you look at someone and know if they are gay, bisexual, straight, pansexual… and so on?

I’m not too sure. I’ve always found it a lot harder to spot a lesbian. Some, women find it easier to hide their sexual orientation. Some do not fit those classy stereotypes the world has about lesbians – a) short hair, b) flat shoes and c) practical clothing.

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The fact is, just like straight people, LGBT people come in all types. The only way to know anyone’s sexuality for sure is to ask.

And yes, that can be an intimidating task, but as long as you’re respectful and do it with a kind heart you’ll know for sure.

You can catch more videos from Arielle Scarcella on her YouTube channel – so good and so funny.

New Study Concludes That Stereotypes Make Coming Out Harder for Bisexuals

When US Gov. Kate Brown of Oregon came out as bisexual to her parents, they reportedly told her they wished she’d come out as a lesbian instead, because it would be easier to understand and accept.

Reactions like this are pretty common, and according to a new study co-authored by UNL sociologist Emily Kazyak, cultural perceptions and stereotypes have more impact on bisexuals’ coming-out experiences than those of gays and lesbians.

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Also read: Bisexual Women Myths Busted

Bisexual stereotypes are often pervasive, negative or over-sexualise individuals. Kazyak highlights that most research ignores bisexual identity or lumps it together with gay and lesbian sexual identity, so she and co-authors Kristin Scherrer of Metropolitan State University in Denver and Rachel Schmitz of UNL looked at how people who identified as bisexual might have different experiences when coming out.

We know that there are certain stereotypes about bisexual identity that are different from gay and lesbian sexuality. Our hunch was that bisexual people really have a distinct experience in coming out to family members, given those stereotypes attached to bisexual identity.”

Emily Kazyak

Researchers interviewed 45 people who identified as bisexual and found that perceptions of how family members viewed bisexuality caused the interviewees to react in one of three ways: to not come out at all; to come out as gay or lesbian; or to come out as bisexual.

Perceptions of bisexuality also affected to whom the person decided to come out, and how those family members responded.

Bisexual identity may be more difficult to accept because of mono-sexism, the belief that people can only be gay or straight, Kazyak said.

We really have this sense that sexual orientation is something that is black and white and that you’re either attracted to people of the opposite sex or you’re attracted to people of the same sex.”

Such beliefs often leave bisexual identity open to re-interpretation and misunderstanding.

Family members will say, ‘Oh, it’s just a phase,’ or, ‘You’re confused. That’s why a lot of people came out as gay or lesbian. They would say things like, ‘I think this will be easier for my family members to understand.’ They thought coming out as bisexual would be too confusing to their family.”

While Kazyak had hypothesized that the experience of coming out would be different for bisexuals, she was surprised at how much stereotypes and perceptions mattered.

We were struck by how much people really thought about this. People put a lot of thought and energy into how they were going to come out. It’s not necessarily easier or harder to come out as bisexual, but there’s a different set of negotiations that bisexual people have to go through.”

The study was published in March in the Journal of Marriage and Family.

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Bisexual Women Myths Busted

You’ve probably heard a lot of stereotypes about bisexuality – the bastard stepchild of sexual orientations. Its something a lot gay and straight people struggle to figure out.

Most people can’t even agree on a definition of bisexuality, which has led to a lot of confusion, angst and prejudices.

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No one is really bisexual. It’s just a phase. They’re either gay and they can’t admit it, or they’re straight and they’re just experimenting. So, why can’t they make up their minds? Because you know, bisexuals can’t be trusted. They’ll just leave you for a man/woman.

They can’t be monogamous. They can’t be happy unless they’re sleeping with a man and a woman at the same time – bisexuals don’t have real relationships. They’re fun for a roll in the hay though.

Bisexual women are sleeping with the enemy. They are stealing lesbian energy and giving it to men. They just want heterosexual privilege. It’s easy to be bisexual because it’s chic.”

We’ve heard it all… so let bust that myth bubble once and for all.

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What Is Being Gay (According to the Media)?

Lesbian and gay stereotypes permeate every aspect of our society, especially the media. These cliched views of gay characters have existed since the 1900s and are still prevalent, whether you notice them or not.

All exposure isn’t good exposure; these stereotypes are actually extremely damaging to the LGBT community, especially for queer women.

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When it comes to portraying lesbianism on screen, there is an historical tendency to sensationalise the subject matter.

If you believe the work of exploitation directors such as Jean Rollin and Jess Franco, every woman alive is just waiting for any chance to shed their clothes and get down to lesbian business in a very explicit way.

Lesbian Media stereotypes

The Promiscuous Casanova

These ladies have a different woman every night, and make damn sure not to remember their names the next morning. They’re suave, cocky and always managing to get the girl. As viewers, we tend to fancy them, or want to be (look at how popular the Shane haircut got). They are usually presented with frown and general self-hatred is a must.

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The Lesbian Psycho

These ladies range from bunny boilers to full blown psychopaths – if they’re not trying to destroy someone’s life, they’re chasing us with kitchen knives.

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The Vampire Dyke

These ladies are a mix of pale skin, pouting lips, sharp teeth and no remorse.  They are so overtly sexual that labelling them, as a lesbian doesn’t really work, as they want everyone. They’ll kiss you, strip you, lick you and then eat you.

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The Hot Lesbian

These ladies are stunningly gorgeous. You’ll watch them wade out of pools in slow motion, climbing off motorcycles in leather one-suits, flicking their gorgeous locks in the wind and licking their plumped up lips in anticipation. These women are there strictly for the male gaze, but men beware, as these women will still your woman. It would appear no one can resist especially the naïve girlfriend of some pumped up jock.

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All exposure isn’t good exposure; these stereotypes are extremely damaging to the LGBT community.

The Bisexual Makeup Tutorial – Tearing Down The Stereotypes Associated With Being Bi

YouTuber Amy Geliebter created this parody video to voice her frustrations concerning the treatment of the bisexual community, and by using makeup, she perfectly articulates the stereotypes associated with being bisexual.

“I can remember having crushes on both boys and girls ever since I was a kid, but every time I confided in someone I was told that I was confused or simply going through a phase. It wasn’t until last year that I was finally able to acknowledge that I was actually bisexual and learn to embrace it.”

Amy Geliebter

Fighting For Visibility in the Lesbian Community

As we all know, there are a lot of stereotypes about the way queer women are “supposed” to look. Yep – short hair, jeans, flannel shirts. More often, the lesbian norm is often represented as masculine; and while that is a perfectly valid form of expression, the normalization of this image can lead to the erasure of queer women who don’t present this way.

Listen to this poem by Joy Young recalling how a femme friend of theirs had to fight for visibility in the queer community.

Are Rigid (Lesbian) Stereotypes Limiting Our Sex Life? Moushumi Ghose & Jenoa Harlow Discuss

Moushumi Ghose and Jenoa Harlow are hosts of The Sex Talk, a web-series focusing on sex education, relationship and dating advice, which hopes to raise awareness, and promote healthy positive attitudes about sex and sexuality.

Moushumi Ghose is a sex therapist. Jenoa Harlow is an out actress sex enthusiast.

In this episode Mou and Jenoa discuss how rigid stereotypes, labels, roles, or having a ‘type’ that you are into might limit you from meeting someone really special.

Watch ‘Don’t Be Such A Lesbian’ from DBSA TV

A short film investigating the misconceptions and stereotypes surrounding lesbian life today and starring a variety of lesbian such as Missfits Effi Mai and DATTCH Founder Robyn Exton.

Don’t Be Such A… came about because I realised as a kid the words don’t be such a lesbian flew out of my mouth way too often and always as an insult. Being a lesbian was the worst thing you could be as far as I was concered. It was only ever spoken about in a negative way.  I feel incredibly lucky that I am proud and happy to be open about my sexuality today, but I know sadly that isn’t always the experience for others.

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Dont be such a… is here to highlight some of the old sterotypes still present, both good and bad and also to find out what YOU really think.

15 Bisexual Problems When Dating

Bisexual – then you’ll recognise some of these classics. In fact, most women in LGBT community have probably heard one of two of these questions, because even though we’re living in the 21st century, a host of stereotypes still exist.

This new BuzzFeed sketch features a woman who identifies as bisexual and another who identifies as a lesbian, as they go to a party together and introduce themselves as girlfriends.

The partygoers’ responses highlight the ridiculous assumptions people still make about bisexuality.

“You guys must be having so many threesomes.”

What Straight People Think Lesbians Look Like

An interesting video. An original documentary by Girl on Girl – “What Straight People Think Lesbians Look Like,” is based on interviews conducted with 15 random people inn New York’s City.

The filmmakers simply ask them, “What do you think a lesbian looks like?”, the results are.. well watch for yourself.

Today’s Topic – Breaking Down the Stereotypes People Have About Lesbians

Breaking Down the Stereotypes People Have About Lesbians

One: We all know each other. We don’t – there are 7 billion people in the world, and (give or take) 2% identify themselves as lesbians (according to some stats), add another 3% who say they’re bisexual women. Thats means there’s around 350 million of us women-loving-women. Now, I seriously do not know 350 million lesbians. Facebook tells me I know around 400 – hey I’m popular, but many of these are people I once met out and not friends, just associates. So conclusion – we don’t know each other, and before you start – I’ve not met you friend from school who kissed a girl, or your aunty Sue who now lives with Jan in 2 bed maisonette.

Two: In a lesbian relationship, one woman is always ‘the man’. Arrrrrgh my pet hate. We are both women, hence why we identify as lesbians. Get a dictionary if you need further clarification.

Three: Butch lesbians want to be men. Fat No! See above and then repeat – lesbians are women who love women. Butch, masculine women do not want to be men. A woman who identifies as a man and takes steps to transition into one. Butch women want to be just what they are: butch WOMEN.

Four: Lesbians are vegetarians. So because we don’t put a penis in our mouth, that must mean that all meat is off-limits? No. Not true – some lesbians love meat. Steaks, fish, southern fried chicken… mmmm. Some don’t. My diet preference doesn’t not determine our sexuality.

Five: Lesbians hate men. The people who constantly complain about men tend to be straight women. Lesbians don’t really care. If we want to be friends with a man, we will. If we don’t, its a non-stresser. Straight women need men for sex, we don’t.

Six: It’s easier to be in a lesbian relationship than a straight one. Ummmm.. why? Because women understand each other? What – did you meet my ex, or my ex before that? No relationship is ever easy, and just because you are both women, doesn’t make it any easier.

Seven: To be a lesbian you need to identify as one. Nope – there are many terms for us to use. Gay, queer, femme, butch, stud – we can label ourselves any way we choose.