Tag Archives: homophobia

Hate Crime Charges Dropped Against Teenager Who Set a Gender Non-Confirming Student on Fire

On 4th November, 2013, San Francisco High School student Sasha Fleischman was sleeping on a public bus on the way home from school, when their clothing was set on fire, in an vicious attack. Fleischman suffered 2nd and 3rd degree burns and had to spend over a month in a hospital.

His attacker was teen Richard Thomas, said he was ‘allegedly’ provoked by the sight of someone who looked like a boy wearing a skirt. Richards has since been charged as an adult with two felony counts and a hate crime enhancement.

Thomas this week pleaded no contest to charges of felony assault and inflicting great bodily injury – but as part of a plea deal, hate crime and aggravated mayhem charges against him were dropped.

He was controversially tried as an adult in the case, and is expected to be sentenced to up to 7 years behind bars as part of the deal, when he is convicted next month.

Researchers have discovered that those who live as neither male or female suffer the most from discrimination and violence in the LGBT community, their determination to remain undefinable seeming to provoke those with gender norms. However, for people like Fleischman, it is important to be who they are, even in the face of intolerance and personal risk.

“When I wear a skirt, it makes them think about gender and not jumping to conclusions.”

Sasha Fleischman

 

Watch ‘Don’t Be Such A Lesbian’ from DBSA TV

A short film investigating the misconceptions and stereotypes surrounding lesbian life today and starring a variety of lesbian such as Missfits Effi Mai and DATTCH Founder Robyn Exton.

Don’t Be Such A… came about because I realised as a kid the words don’t be such a lesbian flew out of my mouth way too often and always as an insult. Being a lesbian was the worst thing you could be as far as I was concered. It was only ever spoken about in a negative way.  I feel incredibly lucky that I am proud and happy to be open about my sexuality today, but I know sadly that isn’t always the experience for others.

DBSA TV

Dont be such a… is here to highlight some of the old sterotypes still present, both good and bad and also to find out what YOU really think.

Nobody Should Be Bullied for Being Who They Are – Show Your Support by Going Purple – #spiritday

The Hetrick-Martin Institute is a nonprofit organization that serves the needs of LGBT youth.

This touching video was produced by the GLAAD team when they visited New York City and interviewed LGBT young people about being bullied.

They shared their experiences with bullying and how bullying has affected their lives.

Watch the video below and see their personal stories:

Nobody should be bullied for being who they are. You can show your support by going purple. Use #spiritday on all social media.

Why Homophobic State Law Sucks –  Refused a Driving Licence, Because Texas Refuses to Recognize Same-Sex Marriages

Connie Wilson has been denied a driver’s license in Texas, because the state of Texas refuses to recognize she took her partner’s name when they married.

Mrs Wilson took her partner Aimee Wilson’s surname last year, when the couple married in California.  However, since relocating to Texas – where the marriage is not recognized – Ms Wilson has been caught in a legal limbo surrounding her name.

Under Californian law, a marriage certificate is enough to certify a change of name, however as Texas does not recognize her marriage as valid, she has found herself with no legal documentation to prove her identity.

Mrs Wilson discovered the problem when she visited the Texas Department of Public Safety to apply for a new driver’s license after her California license expired.

She told the Texas Observer about the experience she had with county clerk…

“Her only words to me were, ‘Is this same-[sex]?’ She immediately told me, ‘You can’t use this to get your license. This doesn’t validate your last name. Do you have anything else?’ She told me I would never get a license with my current name, that the name doesn’t belong to me.”

Connie Wilson

However, as her name is already legally recognized outside of the state, Ms Wilson would have to convince a court to grant her proof of a new name change despite no actual change taking place.

 “My name is already legally Wilson. I don’t know if a judge will even grant me a name change from Wilson to Wilson.

I don’t want any other person to go through what I have experienced over this. I’ve been deprived the freedom to drive a vehicle once my current California driver’s license expires. 

I’m further being deprived the freedom to use air travel, make purchases that require a valid photo identification, seek medical attention for myself or my children, as well as other situations that would require proving who I am legally as an individual.”

Connie Wilson

A Chat with Caryn Hayes, Writer / Director who Doesn’t like Labels

Tom Sykes: You have recently released your short film ‘Clean Hands’, which is about a lesbian couple caring for a terminally ill man. Where did the idea for that come from?

Caryn Hayes: I wanted to do a story about a couple who don’t believe in the same things; one partner is pretty religious and the other is not. I was just fascinated by this kind of relationship and the script just kind of ballooned from there. On a storytelling level I thought it would be pretty gripping for an audience.

TS: Does the film explicitly deal with LGBT issues or are you just trying to tell a story? Could you substitute the lesbian couple for a straight couple or any other kind of couple and still tell the same story?

CH: I wanted to write something that anyone could relate to, but at the same time it is important for me to tell lesbian stories. Beyond that, the main characters could have been a gay or a hetero couple and the film would still work, I think.

TS: It was premiered at the 2014 Pan African Film Festival. Is there a kind of ethos behind that festival?

CH: It’s about promoting movies by directors from Africa itself and also from the African diaspora all over the world. It was held in Los Angeles.

TS: On Kitschmix we’ve reported on the growing problem of homophobia in Africa. Did you experience any hostility at this festival or at any other point in your career?

CH: I think that there’s a quite a bit of homophobia in every community including in the African diaspora. With Clean Hands we haven’t encountered any, at least not so far. It hasn’t been released worldwide yet. At the Pan African Film Festival people just really wanted to watch the movie, nobody wanted to come see it just so they could criticise or bash it. So the response has been pretty positive so far.

TS: Before this film you had made some very successful web series – The World of Cory and Sid and Breaking Point. To what extent does Clean Hands build on that work, or has evolved from it? Are there similar themes in those series that you’ve revisited in your latest offering?

CH: Clean Hands is very different to what I’ve done previously. My most recent series, The World of Cory and Sid, is a dramedy about relationship break-ups amongst roommates and the awkwardness that goes with that. Breaking Point is like a soap opera, a light drama, where there are murders the characters get away with. The only similarity with Clean Hands is that both works have a parent who is not accepting of her daughter’s bisexuality. But then again I wouldn’t say Clean Hands really builds on previous work because we don’t spend so much time on the mother-daughter relationship in the new movie. With Clean Hands I wanted to create a heavier, more serious kind of drama.

TS: Do you prefer writing that heavier dramatic stuff to writing comedy?

CH: It really depends on my mood. In general, I prefer dramedy because I can go wherever I need to go, but in the future I want to do more drama that’s rooted in real-life experience.

TS: You also write fiction.

CH: I’ve written short stories and started novels which I’ve never finished!

TS: How does the process of writing a short story differ from that of a screenplay?

CH: I approach them in the same way. The difference is that you have to do more describing and explaining in fiction whereas you spend more time on dialogue in a screenplay or teleplay. I started writing fiction when I was young and then later on I fell in love with the idea of writing for the screen. Then again, I do want to complete at least one novel and one day I’ll take a vacation and get it completed!

TS: Do you have a routine you follow when you write?

CH: I write best in the mornings. When a deadline’s coming I set my alarm to go off three or four hours before I need to wake up. I have a little playlist, so whatever I’m writing I try and match the mood with the music. If I’m working on something dramatic then I put on film scores, that kind of thing.

TS: What kind of artists do you listen to when you’re writing comedy?

CH: It would depend on what comedy it is. If it’s an “angry chick movie” kinda thing – because I’ve written a couple of those already – it’d be someone like Pink as I find her lyrics just so funny. ‘Like So What’ is a great song. It tends to be more poppy stuff when I’m doing comedy.

TS: You’ve been described as a ‘shining example’ of a lesbian who has made it in Hollywood. How was the journey?

CH: I don’t like labels, but with that said it’s true that I’m a lesbian and an African-American. I wouldn’t have said that the journey was more or less difficult because of my sexuality. It’s difficult for everyone. Being a black lesbian didn’t make it harder of course, but it didn’t make it easier either.

The journey’s been long because I’ve been on it for a long time and I’ve been creating my own content for 5 or 6 years now. That may not seem like such a long time comparatively because it takes other people a lot longer!

JK Rowling Gives Advice to Antigay Harry Potter Twitter Follower Angry Over Dumbledore’s Sexuality

Twitter homophobes beware, never share your negative thoughts with JK Rowling.

When a former fan of J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series vented disgust over revelation that Albus Dumbledore is gay, the writer took to Twitter to offer some alternate reading suggestions Saturday.

‘Once u revealed Dumbledore was homosexual I stopped being a fan. Nice how u blindsided us with that one. Enjoy your billion $,’

Fraticelli tweeted

The British author went for the gentle slice:

Brian Souter is a supporter of Scotland for Marriage, an anti-equality campaign group.

Her suggestion got retweeted multiple times, and the man who hated on a fictional character’s love life put his social media account on private.

 

 

 

Sia to Work with Eminem on New Song Dispute Him Using Anti-Gay Lyrics

Bisexual Australian singer Sia will work with Eminem on new song, even after he used anti-gay slur.

Guts Over Fear, which is the soundtrack to Denzel Washington’s upcoming movie The Equalizer, is the duo’s second single following Beautiful Pain, which appeared on the rapper’s 2013 album The Marshall Mathers LP 2.

Last year, people were furious over the lyrics for ‘Rap God’. Eminem raps that he will ‘break a m0ther f*cker’s table over the back of a couple of faggots and crack it in half’, and ‘you fags think it’s all a game till I walk a flock of glames off a plank’.

Sia, who is openly bisexual, defended Eminem, saying:

‘I know personally that he is not homophobic, but a performance artist. I would never work with someone I believed to be homophobic. He has a character called Slim Shady who represents the worst and darkest bile of America. I see how it can be unclear. But I assure you he is not homophobic himself. He does certainly respect the gay community he is close to in his personal life.’

Sia

However after New York based DJ and writer Keo Nozari called Sia out over her appearance on the album, she announced she would donate the proceeds from her collaboration to the Los Angeles Gay And Lesbian Center.

‘I guess my only hope at this point is that Beautiful Pain will do more good than Rap God does harm. I feel powerless. I thought Slim Shady had been put to bed. Now what’s done is done on my end.’

Sia

Eminem has said his use of the words is not directed at gay people and part of his Slim Shady persona, telling Rolling Stone:

‘The real me sitting here right now talking to you has no issues with gay, straight, transgender, at all.’

Eminem

Harry Potter Teaches Children to Be More Accepting of Gay People, Study Shows

In the esteemed educational institution of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the spells are electrifying, giant spiders and mythical beasts can be found roaming the grounds and the ghosts live in portraits.

Almost every aspect of J.K Rowling’s fictional academy only exists on the page, sprung from her imagination or on theatre screens and DVD discs. But what the world in the Harry Potter books does portray is unfortunate ignorance. ‘Purebloods’ are witches and wizards with magical parents like Ron and Harry, ‘Half-Bloods’ have one magical parent while the offensive term ‘Mudbloods’ is used to describe those with no magical heritage, like Hermione who has Muggles (non-wizarding people) for parents.

Throughout the books we’re shown how Ron, Harry and various others stick up for Hermione and with the readers and viewers empathising with that (along with the various oppressed magical creatures in the series), it seems that we’ve learnt how to become more accepting.

That statement comes from a new study conducted in Northern Italy. Researchers gave high schoolers two questionnaires – one asked which books they’d read while the other asked their opinions on gay people. Interestingly, the results gathered showed that those who had read the Harry Potter books were more accepting of gay people than those who hadn’t read them at all. Not only that but those who answered saying that they identified with Harry himself were also far more likely to show positive attitudes towards gay people.

There is the point being made that as conservative and religious families are often wary of magical related media, the high schoolers who haven’t read the book might come from conservative backgrounds anyway. However, author Loris Vezzali told NY Mag’s Science of Us team that “The books do not directly refer to real-world groups, and so their message can be easily applied to several stigmatized categories,” giving us even more of a reason to love Harry Potter and his magical adventures.

Source:NY Mag

Former Ex-Gay Leaders Join Movement To Ban Gay Conversion Therapy | #BornPerfect

[tweet_dis]Nine former ex-gay leaders, from organisations like Exodus International and Love in Action, have signed onto a letter in partnership with the National Centre for Lesbian Rights[/tweet_dis] calling for a ban on gay conversion therapy and saying that LGBT people should be celebrated and embraced for who they are.

The former ex-gay leaders now say they ‘know better now’, and many involved in gay conversion therapy have shuttered or rebranded, like Exodus International, which very publicly announced it would shut down last summer.

Many of the signatories on the letter have previously spoken out against or apologised for supporting and advocating for gay conversion therapy. However, for some it’s the most public statement they’ve made since renouncing the practice.

“We all got together and said it’s time to produce a statement that is not a statement of apology, but a statement on our beliefs on how conversion therapy harms people. We felt like we needed to make that statement.”

John Smid, Exodus International

Smid said he experienced the harms of gay conversion or reparative therapy firsthand. Leading medical and psychological associations, such as the American Psychological Association, have discredited and criticised gay conversion therapy.

“In my own life, that message kept me trapped in a cycle of believing that I was emotionally ill and incapable of having a healthy life until those things are fixed. For over two decades, I lived in that mind-set. That’s why reparative therapy is so damaging. That was the message that I received and that I taught in my involvement with Exodus and Love in Action.”

John Smid, Exodus International

Advocates and other critics of gay conversion therapy, hope to expand the debate over the practice coast to coast. The letter from the former leaders comes as part of NCLR ramping up its #BornPerfect campaign, which it launched last month.

“We are committed to protecting LGBT children and their families from the severe harms caused by these dangerous practices. These practices have been thoroughly discredited by every major mental health organisation, and yet, every day, young lives are wrecked. We intend to stop the practices once and for all.”

Kate Kendell, NCLR Executive Director

Read the full letter:

Former Ex-Gay Leaders Unite in Opposition to Conversion Therapy

Conversion therapy, also known as “reparative therapy”, “ex-gay therapy,” or “sexual orientation change efforts” (SOCE), professes to help lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people to change or overcome their sexual orientation or gender identity. The majority of those who practice this “therapy” often do so with little or no formal psychological training, operating instead from a strict religious perspective, believing homosexuality to be a “sin.”

At one time, we were not only deeply involved in these “ex-gay” programs, we were the founders, the leaders, and the promoters. Together we represent more than half a century of experience, so few people are more knowledgeable about the ineffectiveness and harm of conversion therapy. We know first-hand the terrible emotional and spiritual damage it can cause, especially for LGBT youth.

We once believed that there was something morally wrong and psychologically “broken” about being LGBT. We know better now. We once believed that sexual orientation or gender identity were somehow chosen or could be changed. We know better now. We once thought it was impossible to embrace our sexual orientation or sexual identity as an intrinsic, healthy part of who we are and who we were created to be. We know better now.

Looking back, we were just believing (and sometimes teaching) what we had been taught— that our identity needed mending. We grew up being told that being LGBT was disordered, sick, mentally ill, sinful, and displeasing to God. We grew up being told that loving, same-sex relationships were shallow, lust-driven, deceived, disordered, and impossible.

We grew up with the repetitive message that LGBT people were not enough — not straight enough, not Christian enough, not manly or womanly enough, not faithful enough, not praying enough. Never, ever enough. “Toxic” probably sums it up best. That message is poison to the soul. Especially a child’s soul.

It can take a lifetime to get rid of that old programming and replace it with healthy, non-toxic views of yourself. Recovery from conversion therapy is difficult at best. Some remain forever scarred, emotionally and spiritually. Conversion therapy reinforces internalized homophobia, anxiety, guilt and depression. It leads to self-loathing and emotional and psychological harm when change doesn’t happen. Regrettably, too many will choose suicide as a result of their sense of failure.

In light of this, we now stand united in our conviction that conversion therapy is not “therapy,” but is instead both ineffective and harmful. We align ourselves with every major mainstream professional medical and mental health organization in denouncing attempts to change sexual orientation or gender identity. We admonish parents to love and accept your LGBT children as they are. We beseech the church to accept, embrace, and affirm LGBT persons with full equality and inclusion.

As former “ex-gay” leaders, having witnessed the incredible harm done to those who attempted to change their sexual orientation or gender identity, we join together in calling for a ban on conversion therapy. It is our firm belief that it is much more productive to support, counsel, and mentor LGBT individuals to embrace who they are in order to live happy, well- adjusted lives. We fully support the aim of #BornPerfect to bring an end to conversion therapy.

Support Rebecca Anderson as She Takes On Westboro Baptist Church

Scottish teen Rebecca Anderson, as young Lesbian women is staging her own response to Westboro’s hate by parodying a ‘Panic! At The Disco song’.

Westboro Baptist Church made headlines last week when the hate group parodied a ‘Panic! At The Disco’ song, in addition to planning a protest of the musical group’s Kansas City show. In response to the protest, Panic! promised to donate $20 to the Human Rights Campaign for every member of the WBC that actually showed.

Hey guys! So Westboro Baptist Church parodied Panic! At The Disco’s ‘I Write Sins Not Tragedies’ and called it ‘You Love Sin What A Tragedy’. They made it a very offensive and homophobic parody and I was shocked and furious about it. In response I have parodied their parody and called it ‘Your Beliefs Are A Lie What A Tragedy’ so I hope you enjoy it.

Rebecca Anderson

Watch – Your Beliefs Are A Lie What A Tragedy

Humiliated Lesbian Soldier Wins Case Against US Army

After a 35-year campaign, Lisa Weiszmiller has been given an “honorary discharge” by the US Army after she was abused, harassed and ultimately thrown out of the military in 1979. Ms Weiszmiller, 53, is pleased that her records have now been updated to show that she was not “less-than-honorably discharged.”

Back in the late 1970s, her superior officers suspected she was gay and subjected her to interrogations, hard labour and homophobic insults. Ms Weiszmiller, who lives in Oklahoma City, told reporters that, ‘If they [the officers] came upon us, we would have to come to parade rest and they would berate us.’

‘These are queers! These are lesbians! Stay away from these homosexual women . They tried everything they could to break us down.’

Ms Weiszmiller

Now she intends to persuade the Department of Veterans’ Affairs to compensate her for her post-traumatic stress disorder, which is a direct consequence of her humiliation. Since she was discharged, Ms Weiszmiller has also battled with drug addiction.

Approximately 100,000 servicepeople were sacked from the US armed forces between 1941 and 2011. The Obama Administration ended the controversial “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy that stopped openly LGBT people from joining the military.

New York Senates Blocks a Bill That Would Ban Gay Conversion Therapy

While plenty of people are simply debating how a person’s queerness came to be; whether they were born this way or if the environments they were in influenced their sexuality, plenty of others just want to know ‘how can we stop the person in question from having a non-heterosexual identity?’. For whatever reason, it’s more heard of than not for the people around said queer person (or for the queer person themselves) to turn to gay conversion therapy; therapy that seeks to ‘cure’ their queerness via methods that can only be described as offensive and deeply concerning.

Many people who have gone through gay conversion therapy have actually found that said conversion didn’t work and that they only ended up suppressing their feelings in the hopes of following a heterosexual life and indeed, it’s young queer people who are the most vulnerable as they have no way to escape should their parents see them put into the therapy program. That’s why so many people have been lobbying to have the conversion therapy banned for minors.

One of these places is New York, the typically liberal leaning state in America. However, when two LGBT-related bills made it to the floor of the New York Senate on Friday night (including the conversion therapy ban), the Senate failed to vote on either of them, despite the Senate session even being extended.

Advocates even called both bills “life saving” but GOP Senate leaders blocked the bills before they could go to the floor for vote, somewhat unfortunate considering that supporters of the bill say they had the votes for the two bills to pass, citing support from Governor Andrew Cuomo.

The second bill was the Gender Non-Discrimination Act (GENDA), which looked to protect trans* New York citizens from gender based discrimination in terms of housing, benefits, public transportation and employment, something that would be greatly needed considering the high rates of LGBT youths who are homeless or in poverty as a result of stifling discrimination.

The bills aren’t going to be forgotten about though, despite this setback as Allison Steinberg, communications director at Empire State Pride Agenda says that “we will not stop fighting for these bills until they pass,” and that “even when the Legislature is not in session, we will work to educate and build support for these bills and we are looking to election season this Fall, which could end up impacting bills like ours in the next session,” so we can look for both bills to return to the New York Senate in the hopes that they will pass soon.

 

How Do You Commit a Hate Crime Against Yourself?

Ten years ago there was a curious case in San Francisco of a lesbian who was caught perpetrating gay hate crimes… against herself. The woman in question, who must use the alias “Jennifer”, was 17 when she smashed eggs all over own jeep, wrote death threats to herself in graffiti and urinated over her own gym locker.

The graffiti included such frightening threats as “DIE FAGGOT DIE”, “YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CAN’T HIDE” and “WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE. WHEN WE’RE DONE WITH YOU YOU WILL BURN IN HELL.”

Her mother, “Mrs T”, immediately contacted the police and Jennifer’s high school administration, both of whom suspected that the abuse was the work of a homophobic man. Mrs T started sitting out all night in her car to keep an eye on the house in the hope of spotting the guilty party.

Jennifer’s high school made every effort to catch the perpetrators, establishing regular Gay-Straight Alliance meetings and offering a $1000 reward for any relevant information about the crimes. One night the police seemed to have cracked the case: they apprehended a group of young people dressed in camouflage who were trespassing on the school grounds. However, the kids were Jennifer’s fellow students who had turned vigilante in order to track down her abusers.

Mrs T was the first to suspect foul play when she questioned Jennifer and found that her story didn’t quite add up. Jennifer couldn’t explain how a stranger could have known which locker was hers. ‘I was starting to think, There’s something wrong here,’ Mrs T told buzzfeed.com recently. When the truth was revealed, Jennifer was convicted of vandalism and became estranged from her mother.

Since then Jennifer has been rehabilitated; she met all the requirements of her probation and went to university to study to become a schoolteacher. Mother and daughter are now reconciled.

Source | Buzzfeed

University Challenges: How LGBT Students Suffer

A sobering new survey from the National Union  of Students has found that 1 in 5 LGB students in Britain have been harassed or bullied. The picture is even bleaker for trans students: 1 in 3 of them have suffered abuse on a university campus in the last year.

Almost 4,000 students from 80 different academies participated in the study. Other revelations include the fact that almost 60% of LGBs and a staggering 80% of trans do not feel “completely safe” while at university. Half the trans respondents have seriously thought about dropping out for good, such has been the negativity of their experiences.

The NUS officers responsible for LGB affairs, Finn McGoldrick and Sky Yarlett, said: ‘This research confirms our fears about the impact that isolation, discrimination and coming out has on LGBT students. It’s appalling to hear that LGBT students don’t feel safe in an educational environment and are experiencing bullying just because of who they are.

‘Many LGBT students continue to feel alone in education and society as a whole. Many suffer mental health and financial issues, and all too often we hear cases of LGBT students leaving education altogether as an indirect result of their identity.

‘We can no longer ignore the plight of LGBT students. We absolutely need to enforce zero tolerance policies for homophobic and transphobic behaviour, ‘banter’, and bullying to make sure our campuses are inclusive and that all students, regardless of their sexuality or identity, have a chance to succeed.’

Stonewall’s Head of Education, Luke Tryl, has called upon British universities to take these statistics seriously and ‘implement the recommendations of the report.’ Stonewall is committed to working with the Higher Education system to improve the experience of LGBT students.

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, has also waded into the debate, calling homophobic abuse ‘always unacceptable and totally wrong.’

 

 

 

 

Gay Kisses in Church Exhibition now in New York

Originally scheduled to show in Rome in 2013, Si, quiero was prevented from being displayed when the Vatican threatened legal action send an injunction and cease and desist letter to the “Opera” gallery in Rome, to shut down the show. Despite the Pope’s openness to tolerance and acceptance of the differences in people’s alternative lifestyles, some things are still too hot for the Church of Rome, which is the reaction Orquin received when depicting gay couples kissing.

However, this has not stopped the work being displayed by other. Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay and Lesbian Art is currently featuring the photos.

This was a very simple decision for us. We heard that the work, these lovely images of people kissing in beautiful settings, was being denied access and we wanted to do something about it. In part, it is why this Museum exists. We offer opportunities to show work that others won’t, particularly work that speaks to the gay and lesbian community. These photographs present same-sex couples displaying the same rights that should be fundamental and basic to all.”

Hunter O’Hanian, Leslie-Lohman Museum Director

The Installation in the Window Gallery at the Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay and Lesbian Art recreates Orquin’s photographs featuring same-sex couples kissing in Italian churches and is on view from the Museum’s street level Window Gallery 24 hours-a-day.

It was the goal Orquin (who was originally from Seville, but residing in Rome now for many years), to expose ‘the bigotry of Italians’, and with the help of friends he photographed the couples in Rome’s beautiful Baroque cathedrals at dawn. The images consciously play with the symbolism of marriage – a right still not afforded gay couples in Italy.

“I am Catholic. I believe in God deeply. I think if you look closely at my pictures no one can find blasphemy or sacrilege. A kiss is a gesture of love, of tenderness between human beings. I wanted to show that if God is love (and this I have learned in church), no one can tell us what kind of love is best. I don’t think my love is different than others’ love.”

Gonzalo Orquin

When It Comes To Coming Out (or Not)

Let’s distinguish between “belonging” and “fitting in”. To belong means to be fully and unconditionally accepted for who you are. It would be great to belong, and, all things considered, belonging is a need and a requirement when it comes to basic human development. To fit in, on the other hand, means to strive towards meeting the conditions for acceptance. We all play the game of fitting in, although the molds that society constructs for people to fit in do not provide all people with equal opportunity to do so.

This doesn’t mean that adaptation is innately wrong, and it doesn’t mean that having or using skills to adapt is innately bad. Individual styles of adaptation are unique and authentic to each person, not only to the situation.

Belonging might seem like a passive thing, though those of us fortunate enough to have found it—as if belonging were an object rather than a process—might notice a constantly flow with how belonging is affirmed and re-affirmed.

Fitting in might seem like an objective thing, but anyone who’s grappled with and analyzed societal expectations would find layers upon conflicting layers of expectations and implications. It’s complex and contextual—and, one upside of this is that particular styles of adaptation can, in some small way, shape the mold that’s set for us to fit into instead of the other way around.

We can take that final sentiment to a simple conclusion: Coming out is an effective way to fight homophobia. Be a living challenge, break the mold society has set, and step up to represent this oppressed minority. Refuse to be invisible. The mold of the world won’t change any other way, and we need that mold to change.

Let’s take a moment to celebrate that determination and commitment—let’s take many moments, whenever that happens, to support community members who take this path. Hurrah!

Now, let’s remember that celebration doesn’t confer an obligation, and it can be hypocritically oppressive to create such an obligation. True, the consequences of coming out as gay can influence and inform an individual’s comfort level with coming out—whether there’s a challenge of discomfort, a threat of fatally violent aggression, or something in between that would affect a personal or professional support system.

Whatever the influence, an individual’s boundaries are their own.

Many of us are hungry for recognition, and to be able to recognize others that could share similar ideals and experiences, perhaps even share our lives with. We need support, we deserve belonging—but when it comes to the personal choice of another individual, we must be aware not to become entitled to the stuff of someone else’s life.

The fact is, not everyone is comfortable with expressing one’s own sexuality, and having that known to others. This is a personal boundary that must be honored as well as we do celebrate individuals who openly represent their sexual orientation.

Let’s be supportive of those who come out. Let’s be supportive of those who are private. Let’s be supportive of individuals in our community, and remember that we’re dealing with individuals—different people, with different lives—There is no one adaptation style that everybody in this community must (or should) adopt in order to be honored or respected.

What would that mean, to honor and respect each individual’s privacy and expressiveness? No prying into their sexuality, no interrogations, no gaydar, no guessing-games, no attitudes of biphobia, no outing other people (and yes to recognizing that, just because they came out to some people, doesn’t mean that it’s fair or right to out an individual to everyone else.)

In short: Let’s be the place that people can belong.

Homophobia in Black Culture: Is The Problem Really So Prevalent?

Homophobia in black communities is almost paradoxical in nature. On one hand, homophobia in black communities exists because homophobia is in almost every group and it’s nigh on impossible to work no matter the racial identities of said faction. But in the same vein it’s not ‘homophobia in black communities’ in terms of it being black communities’ faults. In fact, to call it a problem might be incorrect because it’s anecdotal, not statistical. It’s based on stereotypes and assumptions rather than facts and figures and so while it’s definitely there, homophobia in black cultures could very well be a sometimes viewed, rarely understood occurrence rather than a regular, widespread reality.

It’s best to segment homophobia in black culture in terms of geographical placement. Because geography matters as much as the racial identities of the alleged perpetrators themselves. Look at the homophobia from the countries of Africa and the problem is a serious one, just based on the laws, regulations and negative attitudes of the people and the governments. From the ‘Kill the Gays’ bill in Uganda that advocates the murder of LGBT identified people to the ‘corrective’ rapes committed against the women of Nigeria and plenty of other countries, you can understand why people rightfully say that the continent of Africa has a homophobia problem. But then you look at South Africa, with the country’s gay marriage laws (surprisingly, it’s legal there) and awful history of racism and the situation changes.

And then you move on to The Americas, where the black and Hispanic citizens of South America are surrounded by a bastion of queer right support. Argentina was the tenth country in the world to legalise gay marriage, Brazil with the largest Catholic population in the world made gay marriage legal just last year and Chile’s new president, Michelle Bachelet, is reportedly a supporter of same-gender matrimony too. In North America, meanwhile, the largely black countries of the Caribbean are only a few pips shy of Africa’s harshness with Jamaica being a prime example as it has regularly been reported on that gay men and women have been run out of their homes, stoned and beaten on account of a not so acceptable identity.

The U.S.A, whilst being part of North America, posses an altogether different set of problems because the black identities from populations all around the world meet in America with black people of African, Caribbean and South American heritage merging with America’s recent majority support for queer rights and gay marriage. So why does this happen in America but less so in Africa and other predominantly black locations? Like many issues pertaining to race, the answer is quite succinctly, ‘white people’.

The problem with pointing the finger at black communities and wrongly accusing them of ethnicity wide homophobia is that the homophobia that’s witnessed isn’t necessarily their fault. Unfortunately for the the countries mentioned (the majority of the countries in Africa, Jamaica etc.) not only were they squeezed by the harsh and controlling forearms of the British Empire, they also had the pleasure of being stuck with their sodomy laws and egregious views on homosexuality too. Many of these homophobic ideals stuck, just on account of having little else to compare it to. If your white racist leaders (which the British Empire were, sorry to break it to you hardcore anglophiles) were to tell you that ‘gay is bad’ then you don’t have a choice but to believe them because going against the homophobic grain could find yourself met with beatings or murder or lifelong servitude and slavery, which the locations had only just managed to escape from not long before.

Thanks to the British Empire’s long reach and the inability of the predominantly black inhabited countries to fight back, there was nothing to say or do and understandably, the freedom and independence of those countries was largely a more pressing concern than the unfortunate treatment of queer people. However, having said that, there is still a larger question of why in this day and age it’s still believed that a) it’s the fault of black communities and b) why people are busy fighting over themselves over the ‘who’ and ‘how’ of it all rather than just doing something about it. It’s also important to point out that the predominantly white (and widely racist) culture of Russia makes it an equally as hostile place to be queer as the African countries, clearly showing that homophobia does not care for the racial identity of the people that it so poisonously permeates.

So believed is it, that black people have become the scapegoat and the go to community to blame in the case of gay rights when something doesn’t go the LGBT community’s way. For example, when Proposition 8, the Californian amendment that would ban gay marriage (after previously making it legal) passed, poorly reported on statistics meant that it became widely believed that black people were to blame. It was easy to believe for some, who were already high off of the intoxicating stereotypical fumes that black people don’t like gay people (despite plenty of people being both black and gay – but more on that later) and as this article by Ta-Nehisi Coates explains, the statistics weren’t even right. Just 7 percent of votes for Prop 8 were filed by black voters and only 58 percent of the black people who voted, voted in favour of Prop 8 (granted any majority figure is awful, but the year was 2008, when support for gay marriage was inarguably less prevalent). That still led plenty to point some more appendages at black church attendance, suggesting that the homophobia in the black community is the fault of their religious leanings (they attend church more than any other ethnic group in the USA), despite, y’know, church-going black people voting in favour of Prop 8 less than any other church-going ethnic group.

While these perceptions of homophobia in black culture have been dismantled, critically, there’s one other place that hasn’t been looked at at all; those who are both black and gay. That is to say, where are they? Let’s not get the message mixed up here, I mean this in terms of representation because people have very real and valid reasons not to come out so we can never begrudge them that, but because of racism (again – it’s a recurring trend) there are few famous out people of colour (Wanda Sykes and Michael Sam are two of the most famous names) fictional black and gay characters just aren’t being shown.

According to a Gallup poll from May, 2014, 55% of Americans support gay marriage. But that figure didn’t get there by equal representation, it came there carried in the hands of traditionally attractive white people, of people who were stepping on the backs of black queers. People don’t think that black and gay people exist, which is exactly why people say things like ‘homophobia is black people’s fault’ with actual black and gay people themselves failing to recognise that you are capable of being both (with some black people actually saying that this is a reason why their sexuality wasn’t realised until later on in life).

If you don’t know that they’re there then how can you prove anything otherwise? If the only portrayals of blackness in relation to queerness are seen in terms of homophobic experiences (e.g Glee’s black Latina Santana Lopez and her disapproving Hispanic grandmother) then how can the myth be dispelled? And furthermore, how do we move on from perpetrating the myth at all?

These are very tricky questions to be answered and they are not ones that can be answered while racist notions continue to make them believable, because as rarely cited statistics shows, blackness in homophobia isn’t prevalent at all; each culture is just as homophobic as one another.

Daring New US TV Ad Takes On Homophobia

Two pro-LGBT rights organisations have produced a 30-second TV ad that will seek to change public attitudes to same-sex marriage in the US state of Oklahoma. Freedom Oklahoma and Freedom to Marry intend the ad to be part of their new public initiative to take on intolerance across the United States.

The broadcast focuses on the Oklahoma-based Cuyler family, whose patriarch is retired soldier Colonel Ed Cuyler who served 22 years in the US Army, during which time he was awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross and Purple Heart medals for bravery. He has been married to his wife for almost 40 years.

In the ad, Colonel Cuyler discusses the meaning and value of his marriage and why it is important to stay loyal and respectful to his wife. He is addressing his daughter Deedra, who is a lesbian, and her partner Amber. The couple are bringing up three infant children.

‘Here in Oklahoma, we value family. When Deedra told me she was gay, as her dad, I was worried because I wanted to protect her. When Deedra met Amber, I realized she could have a family. Only marriage means the ability to take care of your family.’

Colonel Cuyler

While the TV spot is expected to give a spiritual boost to gay and lesbian people in Oklahoma, it will surely be controversial amongst more reactionary Oklahomans. At the same time, its broadcast is extremely timely, given that only six months ago a federal judge overturned the ban on gay marriage that had existed in Oklahoma for decades. LGBTs in Oklahoma and all over the world are waiting in hot anticipation for the final ruling in this case.

Meet ‘Say My Name’, the Gay British Series Set in the Black Community

The ‘typical’, often seen queer characters in television in media are white. Propped up by Eurocentric (read: ‘white is right’) ideals, most shows are quick to acknowledge queer identities as diversity, whilst failing to recognise both black and queer identities in the same vein. And it is a problem because without representation people are neither understanding or empathetic of the lives of queer people of colour, especially those who live outside of rich suburbs, living in more typically urban areas instead. But they do exist and there are stories to be told. Grand, emotional, gritty and real stories that would pull at our heartstrings and captivate us in ways that the many instances of middle class white women in high flying jobs never could, because despite not being a very good representation of white queer ladies anyway, there’s an entire subset of queer people of colour being left out of the equation.

This is what Say My Name was created to fix. Based around the 2006 contemporary play of the same name, Say My Name was a “contemporary British gay love story set against a gritty grimy backdrop of ‘street’ reality” that has now been expanded into a full series. Say My Name (the short) originally rose to fame as it won the “Angry Now” competition at the Royal Court Theatre in London, leading many to take interest in the sort of story that frankly, had never been depicted in a good light (or at all) previously. From a play it evolved into a short film and was aired at plenty of film festivals worth their salt (including Outfest in Los Angeles) around the globe.

There are several episodes of Say My Name in the pipeline as the series follows characters Chris and Ricky through the “changing tides of this emotional rollercoaster”. Don’t expect it to be all post-Big Dipper types downs though, as promised scenes include meeting ex-girlfriends, parents and coming out, all of which are likely to create hilarity, elation and a few tears too once the series airs, so watch a preview below to find out more.


Say My Name!

ViaSay My Name.

 

The Out Field – A Collection of Gay Pro Athletes Talk About Pro Sports

The Out Field – Watch this powerful video by gay pro athletes in America. Michael Sam, Brittany Griner, Joanna Lohman and Lianne Sanderson talk exclusively to People magazine about being out and gay in pro-sports.  They all touch on coming out to their teammates and their families.

image source

Straight Question, Straight Answer

[tweet_dis]Words can be empowering or limiting depending on the context [/tweet_dis]. Most LGBTQIA+ communities have coined and adopted an extensive vocabulary that provides us with ways to differentiate between sex and gender, between gender and sexual orientation, between sexual orientation and romantic orientation—It can help to recognize different aspects and how these combine in different ways, in a person or a relationship.

These can also intimidate or distract a label-conscious individual from simply accepting a human experience.

When it comes to cisgendered straight people asking a queer couple something like, “Which one of you is the man, and which one of you is the woman?” It can be an awkward situation, more awkward than not being on the same page—It’s a matter of not having the same dictionary, not reading the same alphabet, even not being in the same library.

“Which one of you is the man, and which one of you is the woman?”

It can matter that such a question rarely comes out of ill will or some desire to confront the queer couple with how strange and wrong the relationship is—Rather, it usually comes from a paradigm that serves as a common default and therefore we would all commonly understand it even if it no longer applies. Sometimes, it does apply to a queer couple that just so happens to suit traditional masculine and feminine roles comfortably.

In the latter case, the straight querent gets a more-or-less straight answer. For example, the butch lesbian is the man, and the lipstick lesbian is the woman, and everyone in the conversation ends up satisfied. Or, the butch lesbian is the woman, and the lipstick lesbian is the man, the conversation turns to some slightly more queer than anticipated – who fulfils so-and-so roles professionally versus at home versus (if you want to spice up the conversation) in the bedroom—but nothing too serious, nothing that shakes the foundations of the default paradigm, and everyone in the conversation ends up satisfied. This happens.

It also does frequently happen that the question doesn’t get conversation rolling quite so easily. Gay comedienne Ellen DeGeneres is credited with the observation that, “Asking who’s the man and who’s the woman in a same sex relationship is like asking which chopstick is the fork.” The conventions of a straight relationship don’t apply to queer relationships. How amusingly ignorant it is that some people would presume that it does—and the way DeGeneres put it is clever, simple, and not generally confrontational. That conversation can end with a laugh and a change of topic.

In many other ways, a conversation resulting from this question can proceed splendidly.

This doesn’t change the fact that the question does impose expectation, and (unintentionally, or even intentionally) highlights how strange and wrong a queer relationship is in the context of a heteronormative society. If the conversation did happen to take a turn for the less-than-splendid-and-satisfactorily, that’s probably the reason why.

Considering this, the real answer to the question is another question: Why does this cisgendered straight person care about who fits what gender role, in a relationship in which they are not included?

The answer can indicate not only how the conversation should proceed, but whether it’s worth having to everyone involved.

Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Foundation Releases Equality Rising report

This week, the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Foundation released Equality Rising report, which is outlines the many of the successes and setbacks of LGBT activists, advocates, and allies around the world in 2013. Released for the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia – #IDAHOT, this report aims to educate people about many of the notable events from last year in the growing global equality movement.

Equality Rising highlights victories for marriage equality in five nations, progress in the fight for transgender equality on at least four continents, as well as increased LGBT visibility broadly and tremendous acts of courage in nations as dangerous for LGBT people as Iran.  The report also documents new anti-LGBT laws, ongoing persecution and violence, and efforts by extreme anti-LGBT Americans to export hateful rhetoric and misinformation abroad.

A few highlights from the report include:

  • More nations—Brazil, France, New Zealand, England and Wales in the United Kingdom, and Uruguay—opened the doors to marriage equality in 2013 than any year in history. These victories brought the total number of nations extending full marriage rights to all of its citizens to 16.
  • Although millions of transgender people around the world remain frequent targets for discrimination, at least eight nations on four continents took tangible steps toward greater equality for transgender and intersex citizens.
  • LGBT people have become more visible globally that ever before—in the workplace, on television, and running for office at the local, state, and national levels and winning.
  • Nigeria, Russia, and Uganda passed laws in 2013 that inhibited the freedom of speech and association of LGBT people and their allies, with the law in Uganda allowing for life imprisonment as a punishment for “aggravated homosexuality”.
  • In more than 80 countries, LGBT people are considered criminals for simply being who they are. They are frequently demonized for political gain, and they remain targets of harassment, arrest, violence, and in some cases, torture.

Equality Rising comes on the heels of last year’s announcement of HRC Foundation’s global engagement program, which is dedicated to joining advocates around the world in advancing global equality. The program aims to do so by educating Americans on the human rights of LGBT people around the world; exposing the work of prominent anti-gay American organizations that have pushed anti-gay laws and legislation overseas; leveraging its relationships with American policymakers, faith communities, corporations and other change agents to help protect the human rights of LGBT people abroad; and providing fellowships at HRC for foreign LGBT advocates.

Fashionistas to Boycott Dorchester Hotels Over Homophobia Row

Influential figures in the US fashion industry have called for a boycott of all hotels owned by the Dorchester Collection because the company is owned by the government of Brunei which recently changed its nation’s laws to allow the stoning to death of convicted homosexuals.

Fashion designers Peter Som and Brian Atwood, along with the co-owner of the Decades Boutique, Cameron Silver, have demanded that people stop attending designer dinners and charity fashion shows at such plush venues as the Beverley Hills Hotel.

Silver said on Tuesday, ‘The fashion industry and its supporters are unified in boycotting these properties.’ Asked about how the campaign got going, he replied, ‘Someone mentioned it to me while I was in New York on Sunday, I looked up an article [about the new law] and then posted something. [Valentino PR Director] Carlos Souza reposted it and then it was reposted by [Valentino’s longtime business partner] Giancarlo [Giammetti] and it just sort of grew from there.’

Shoe designer Atwood waded into the row with these comments on Instagram: ‘Don’t stay at the Principe di Savoia, Le Meurice, or the Dorchester during Milan, Paris or London fashion week’s [sic] this June to October. Send a clear signal to their owner, The Sultan of Brunei, that stoning people to death for being gay in Brunei is not acceptable. His new law comes into effect tomorrow April 22. Why not cancel your bookings tomorrow?’

In response, the PR manager for the Beverley Hills Hotel, Leslie Lefkowitz, issued the following statement: ‘We do not tolerate any form of discrimination of any kind. The laws that exist in other countries outside of where Dorchester Collection operates do not affect the policies that govern how we run our hotels. Dorchester Collection’s Code emphasizes equality, respect and integrity in all areas of our operation, and strongly values people and cultural diversity amongst our guests and employees.’

Image source

How Tolerant Are They? I Mean, Really?

How accepting are straight people of LGBTs? And just because they say they’re tolerant, do they behave in a tolerant fashion? “Beyond the Box”, an eye-opening new study from Belgium has tried to answer these tricky questions.

The study was commissioned by the State Secretary of Brussels, Bruno De Lille, and took six months to complete. It concluded that sexist and anti-LGBT sentiments are deeply-rooted in Belgian society, despite recent advances such as the legalisation of same-sex unions.

Myrte Dierckx, an academic from Antwerp University, believes the findings show that straight people will say they are welcoming of gay, lesbian and transgender people, while secretly harbouring discriminatory views. Furthermore, older heterosexual men were found to be more resistant to equality while those respondents who had a diverse range of friends and family members were more likely to support LGBT rights.

Worryingly, the study also showed that a number of young heterosexual Belgians have bullied, harassed or in some other way exhibited inappropriate behaviour towards gays and lesbians. Some commentators have called for Belgium’s struggle against homophobia and sexism to be as serious and committed as the country’s campaign against racism which, in a relatively short period, has transformed popular attitudes to ethnic minorities.

Mr De Lille intended “Beyond the Box” to confront LGBT hatred in Brussels, which is one of Europe’s most diverse and open-minded cities. ‘If we can bring different people into more contact with each other,’ says Mr De Lille, ‘we will have good results in the area of homophobia and sexism, and that’s good news for a city like Brussels.’

image source – Alberto de Pedro’s website