Tag Archives: Lesbian Wedding

Samira Wiley Releases Stunning Picture Of Her Wedding

Samira Wiley and Lauren Morelli tied the knot in March last year.

However, to celebrate the passing of the New Year, Wiley shared a beautiful and candid shot of their wedding, which took place in Palm Springs, California.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BddxqHZny4q

The wedding was intimate with the couple’s closest family and friends there. Wiley’s parents, who are co-pastors of Covenant Baptist United Church of Christ in Washington D.C, officiated the ceremony.

The couple were together for three years by the time Morelli proposed.

Kristen Stewart and Stella Maxwell Casually Crash A Lesbian Wedding – And The Brides Loved It!

Over the weekend, Kirsten and Kayleigh Jennings tied the knot at a family member’s backyard in Canada. Once it was time for the reception at a pizza parlor called Pizzeria Gusto in Winnipeg, the newlyweds and 90 lucky guests received an unexpected visitor.

According to the couple, the restaurant’s owner asked if it was okay for Stewart and Maxwell to join the couple’s party for a few drinks.

Kirsten said that she didn’t know who Stewart was prior to this, while Kayleigh said that they treated the stars just like any other guest at their reception.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BW5ZdlljdvO/

I told Kir, ‘Hey, let’s just treat them as random guests. Let’s just treat them with kindness — southern hospitality. Winnipeg hospitality.'”

It appears that neither of the brides were overwhelmingly starstruck, but were instead focused on the party.

They looked just like two normal girls. ‘They look a little Hollywood, but if we didn’t know who they were, I don’t know if I would have known. We said ‘Hey, you know. Come on and meet your guests and, you know, don’t segregate yourselves. Come and party.'”

Kirsten added,

She pulled up with Stella and we were introduced to them. At one point, someone asked her what kind of music she liked and she said, ‘I love the Beastie Boys’ so they played some Beastie Boys.”

While the couple was planning to have a “low-key, quiet wedding” with Karli Elizabeth Colpitts serving as DJ, some things just can’t be predicted.

It was complimentary to have her there but we just tried to keep it as normal and casual as possible. They were just trying to have a good time just like the rest of us.”

Kirsten added

Probably the best part was everyone still made us feel like the guests of honor.”

According to the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, the couple has been together since 2010 when they met while bartending in the Cayman Islands. Kirsten and Kayleigh plan on moving to Austin, Texas in the near future because Winnipeg is “way too cold.”

Congratulations to the couple!

Cherokee Nation Legalizes Same-Sex Marriage

The Cherokee Nation, the largest Native American tribe, has just ruled same-sex marriage constitutional for its 317,000 citizens.

In 2004, the Cherokee Nation banned same-sex marriage on the grounds that marriage is between one man and one woman. Because the Nation is an autonomous body separate from the United States, it was not required to uphold the 2015 Obergefell v. Hodges decision that legalized same-sex marriage in the United States.

Other Native American tribes such as the Navajo Nation maintain that same-sex marriage is illegal, but many tribes have not taken a stand either way.

The assistant attorney general of the Cherokee Nation, Chrissi Nimmo, told Huffington Post that he expects a “mixed reaction” from tribal members. ”

Without a doubt, there will be tribal members and officials who support this and are proud of this, and there will be others … who don’t like it.”

Cherokee Nation Attorney General Todd Hembree wrote the official opinion for the decision:

The right to marry without the freedom to marry the person of one’s choice is no right at all. The history of perpetual partnerships and marriage among Cherokees supports the conclusion that Cherokee citizens have a fundamental right not only to choose a spouse but also, with mutual consent, to join together and form a household irrespective of sexual orientation.

The same-sex marriage question became pertinent when the Cherokee Nation Tax Commission inquired as to whether a same-sex marriage certificate was legal proof of a woman’s identity despite the tribe’s ban.

Nimmo says that Obergefell v. Hodges heavily informed the decision, as did Cherokee oral history, ancient Cherokee customs and beliefs about sexuality, and a tradition of alternative sexuality in the tribe. Says Nimmo:

Our oral history teaches us also that the Cherokee and Euro-American worldviews differed dramatically regarding appropriate gender roles, marriage, sexuality, and spiritual beliefs. Indeed, while the majority of Cherokees subscribed to the traditional gender roles, evidence suggests a tradition of homosexuality or alternative sexuality among a minority of Cherokees.

The good news? Hembree’s decision went into effect immediately, making marriage possible for thousands of lesbian, gay and bisexual citizens. The bad news is that Hembree admits that although his decision is binding, any Cherokee official can challenge it at any time, although he says that he “doesn’t really know who would challenge it.”

Regardless, this is a reason to celebrate! Read the official opinion here.

Free Services For Lesbians Hurrying to Get Married Before Trump’s Inauguration

The day after Trump was elected, what did you do? Some people protested. Some peopled headed straight to a bar.

Many gay people hurried to get married.

Trump told 60 Minutes that he was “fine” with same-sex marriage, and that the 2015 Supreme Court case Obergefell v. Hodges, which ruled that gay marriage is constitutional, means that the debate is “settled.” But that hasn’t stopped thousands of couples from rushing to tie the knot, according to The New York Times. Needless to say, Trump’s pro-conversion therapy Vice President and largely anti-gay cabinet have not soothed any nerves.

Concerned for LGBT couples, a woman named Mitzie Whelan started the website LoveTrumpsHate.com. The website lists bakeries, photographers, musicians, planners, officiants, florists and even henna artists willing to donate their services to LGBT couples in a hurry to get married before Inauguration Day.

The services are available in twenty-six states, approximately half of which voted Republican in 2016. The services include a floral designer in Alaska, a Wiccan minister in Colorado, a bakery called Hippie Chick in New Hampshire, an officiant offering free hugs, a gown donor in that will ship anywhere, and secular and religious officiants all over the country.

Not every provider on the list is a professional, look into their work before making firm arrangements. However, every provider on the list is offering their services completely free of charge for nothing in return. Due to high demand, contact providers as soon as possible if you’re interested.

Whelan says, on the official website:

In light of recent events, we understand that people are scared about our uncertain future as a country. We still believe that love will prevail, but things are looking a little bleak right now. With new leaders that have threatened to set the country back 50 years, we want to do everything we can to help anyone exercise their right to love, be themselves, and be free. Money shouldn’t get in the way of that, especially when so much could be at stake in so little time. This site was created to bring lovers of love together, and be a light to a lot of people who are only seeing darkness right now.

If you and your girlfriend are hurrying to get married before January 2017, head over to LoveTrumpsHate.com and start planning! (Perhaps use the free planner in Minnesota.)

Seven Perfect Ways to Propose

It’s almost the holiday season, and love is in the air!

You’ve been dating your girlfriend for a while, and you’re absolutely sure that she’s the one. All that’s left is to pop the question.

Treasure Hunt

Take her to the spot where you first met, and guide her step by step on a treasure hunt for items based on your memories together. For example, bury a copy of the first letter you ever left on her doorstep, or hide a box of your favorite photographs.

For the last step of the treasure hunt, lead her somewhere where all of your friends and family are waiting. Then get down on one knee.

Surprise Proposal – Lesbian

Musical Number

Using her favorite song, a song that has a lot of significance to your relationship, or an original composition, create a musical slideshow of photographs.

In the final photo, ask her to be your wife.

Best same sex proposal !!! (warning will make you cry)

Graduation Day

Graduation isn’t just about finishing college, it’s also about starting a new life, and graduation proposals are becoming increasingly popular. With the permission from the party organizers, plan a graduation party proposal that your girlfriend will remember – present her with a ring as her friends and family members cheer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nP_JDU2Wm08

Commencement and emotional (Lesbian) Proposal 2015

Love Languages

Compose a song, poem or story for your girlfriend, incorporating inside jokes or words that only you two understand. Similarly, if you’ve traveled the world together or if you each come from different cultures, incorporate words, phrases and idioms from different languages. After all, is one language really enough to express how much you love her?

Lesbians Travel World: The Big Marriage Proposal in the Philippines

High on Love

Push her out of a plane. Not maliciously – do it during a skydiving trip. While you’re both twirling through the clouds, your friends will write “Will you marry me?” on the ground in large cutout letters so that your girlfriend can read it from the sky. When she lands, the question will knock her off her feet again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVoPrcalH40

Lesbian Marriage Proposal – Andie & Lucy 10-18-14

Rose Ceremony

Different colors of the same flower have different meanings. For example, pink roses mean gratitude while lavender roses signify enchantment.

Arrange an intimate rose ceremony with your closest friends and family. Each guest will read the meaning of the flower – “A pink rose for the gratitude your girlfriend feels for having you in her life” – and then hand it to your girlfriend. At the end of the ceremony, she’ll have a bouquet of roses, a heart full of love and a girlfriend who’s dropping down to one knee.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYOOvhpnACg

Kisha’s Surprise Proposal (The Lesbian Edition)

BONUS: The couple in this video isn’t lesbian, but it’s still a wonderful idea.

If your girlfriend is a Disney enthusiast or a musical theatre nerd, enlist her friends to dress up as her favorite characters and sing. How can your girlfriend say no to a soulful rendition of “Kiss the Girl”?

A Disney Surprise Proposal (Stephanie and Casey)

Couple’s Epic Engagement Photos Prove Two Princesses Are Better Than One

This summer, Yalonda and Kayla Solseng wanted an unforgettable photo shoot to capture their love, and they have delivered – their own storybook romance in an epic princess-themed engagement shoot.

Kayla dressed up as Belle from Beauty and the Beast, while Yalonda dressed up as Cinderella.

The couple – who also got married this month – met two years ago, one the website Plenty Of Fish, and soon connected over their obsession with the TV show Once Upon A Time

Talking Huffington Post, Kayla explained

That show rewrites fairytales and this was our modern-day fairytale,”

After dating for nine months, Yalonda proposed to Kayla while studying abroad in England. Kayla came to visit around the holidays and the pair planned a trip to Switzerland. After a day on the slopes, they came back to their hotel where Yalonda surprised Kayla with a fairytale book she had written and illustrated based on the couple’s own love story.

Earlier this month, Kayla and Yalonda made it all official when they tied the knot at Romantic Moon Events Center ― the same venue where they had taken their engagement photos.

Yalonda adds

Gay marriage has been legalized in the U.S. for over a year and we hardly have gay or lesbian characters in children’s movies ― let alone them being main characters. Kids want to be the characters they grow up with but when none of the characters represent you, then you feel alone. I want our photos to be shown to kids and families as a way of saying it’s okay to be who you are. It’s okay to be with the person you love.”

Image source SUN AND MOON PHOTOGRAPHY

New Study Concludes Lesbian Couples Five Times More Likely To Split Than Gay Men

A new study published in Ireland, on civil partnerships in the country has discovered have shown lesbian couples are more likely to separate than gay male couples.

The figures released by the Court Service show that of the 2,071 civil partnerships entered into between 2011 and 2015, 6% had now been dissolved.

However, when the figures were broken down into female and male same-sex couples, lesbians were far more likely to break up than gay men.

In fact, around 12% of lesbian partnerships had been dissolved by the end of last year, compared with just 2.4% cent of gay partnerships.

According to The Independent these figures are in line with international trends.

The data also showed that heterosexual divorce in Ireland was the highest it has ever been in 2015 with the majority of applications for divorces and separations made by wives.

34 Questions You Should Answer Together Before Getting Married

Now that marriage equality has passed, many of us are tempted to get married quickly – to avoid the laws being reversed. Unfortunately, we don’t have the same liberty that heterosexual couples have – we can’t just get divorced and leave it at that. Every divorce in the queer community “validates” someone who opposed gay marriage in the first place, and that’s a statistic we really can’t afford to be a part of – no matter how wrong it might be.

If you want to make sure you’re getting married for the right reasons, go through this list with your partner – you should be able to answer almost every question. Expect a little hesitation on some; after all, no one is perfect, and the human brain is full of doubts. But if you find yourself struggling with every question, or a large majority, maybe your relationship shouldn’t take the next step.

1. Are you willing to be the best version of yourself?

As romantic as it is to think that you’re perfect just how you are, and as much as you want your partner to think you’re already perfect… Truthfully, you’re not, and you need to understand that. There’s a big problem if you’re convinced that you don’t need to change. No one is perfect, and everyone has room for improvement.

2. What could you be doing better?

In order for a relationship to be ready to progress to marriage, both partners will need to focus on improving themselves – not how to improve each other. No one will really change unless they actually have the motivation to change, so if you can’t identify any weaknesses in your loving style, you’re probably not loving her to the best of your ability. No one is perfect – and marriage is a constant journey of self-improvement.

3. Does she make you better or worse?

There’s this romanticized image of the whole “bad girl vibe”, but really, if you’re with a self-proclaimed “bad girl”, you’re probably going to get hurt. Make sure the person you’re going to marry is someone who actually makes your life better. She should also motivate you to do better – the woman for you is the one who will be your cheerleader when you need it the most.

4. Do you fully accept each other – flaws and all?

Just because she wants you to do and be your best, that doesn’t mean that she is allowed to have problems with you on a personal level. Everyone is unique, so if either of you is expecting the other to conform to your personal idea of “perfect”, there’s a problem.

5. Will you stick it out through the tough times?

Things are going to be hard sometimes – and there are going to be times when you want to throw your hands up and be done with the whole situation. Are you willing to push yourself through those hard times for the eventual sunshine on the other side?

6. Will you comfort her when she cries?

Not every day is going to be happy – and being able to be someone’s metaphorical shoulder to cry on is a huge part of a happy relationship. Note that I didn’t say you’ll fix all her problems – it would be unfair for either of you to expect that. You can help her through her dark times without being her light and savior.

7. Do you love her, and are you willing to make sure the love sticks around?

Falling in love happens by chance – but staying in love happens by choice. It will take a great amount of effort to love her 50 years from now, just the same as you love her now. If you’re not ready to make your love for her a priority in life, you’re not ready to get married.

8. Who are you, by yourself?

If you don’t know who you are on your own, you’re not going to be a good partner – no exceptions. You need to fully understand yourself and be able to come up with a short description of what you do, what you want to do, and your personal goals. No one else can answer this one for you.

9. Does this relationship make you happy?

Nothing is going to make you happy 100% of the time, but your relationship should have more happiness than sadness – otherwise, you’re better off single. It’s actually scientifically proven that a woman in an unhappy relationship is going to be less healthy and happy overall – so make sure your relationship really is bringing out the best.

10. Do you feel happy when you wake up next to each other?

Whether the two of you live together yet or not (I strongly believe you should live together before you decide you want to get married, but not everyone feels the same way), you need to know that seeing her face is going to make you happy – even if she gets to sleep in and you don’t. Does she make you happy when you’re half asleep?

11. Do you feel trapped? Does she?

There’s a big to-do about staying in a relationship because you’ve invested time in it. But, realistically, this isn’t a good foundation for your relationship. That time will never be returned to you, so staying in a relationship just because you’ve put so much into it is a sure way to set yourself up for lifelong disappointment. If it feels like an obligation, you’re not going to magically be satisfied in the future – get out before it goes too far.

12. Are we partners, or just girlfriends?

In a happy, healthy relationship, both partners will be equals. Maybe you subscribe to some traditional roles in your relationship, but in terms of expectations and compromise, you should both be represented in a way that feels fair to you. This doesn’t necessarily mean 50-50, but it should be balanced in terms of your own needs – both of your needs.

13. Do you have fun together?

Just like the happiness question, it’s not going to be fun all the time, but the two of you should be able to have a good time and make each other laugh. Otherwise, the whole thing will feel like work, and it doesn’t really matter who you marry.

14. Do you have fun when we’re not together, too?

If either of you is dependent on the other person for your happiness, you’ll never truly be happy. You need to be your own person, and you need to be able to spend time apart without being sad about it!

15. Does she let you be yourself?

Relationships require compromise, but you should never feel that you’re compromising parts of yourself. If she’s pruned away something important to you, is it worth it to say goodbye to that part of your life forever, or would you be happier single and free to be yourself? (Hint: You should always pick B.)

16. Why are you in this relationship?

There aren’t exactly right and wrong answers here, but exploring why you’re in a relationship will help you decide if it’s worth being in it or not. If you feel like you’re only in the relationship because it’s easier than breaking up, you’re definitely letting yourself – and your partner – down.

17. What does the future hold?

Not everyone has a concrete plan about what the future holds for them, but some of us do – and it’s not good to live entirely in the now. You should know where the relationship is headed, and you should both be on the same page. You should be confident that your future plans align with one another, without necessarily being exactly the same.

18. Are you growing together or apart?

People change over time – it’s inevitable, and that’s a good thing. But not everyone will grow in the same direction. Are you and your partner still going the same way, or has one of you detoured? It’s possible to get back on track once you’ve gone apart, but it’ll take a steady effort from both of you, and you’ll need to make sure you’re back on the same page before you say “I do”.

19. Do you believe you can create the life you want with this woman?

This is something we often overlook – is your dream future actually with her, or is she just a fill-in? The perfect woman to marry will have a similar vision, and the two of you will work together to create it.

20. Do you share the same core values?

Your opinions are one of the areas you’re definitely going to disagree on sometimes, but the important issues – the ones you live and die for – should be aligned. If you’re afraid to even talk about the big issues, you’re not right for each other. Try to have the talk now, and see if you were hiding things for no reason. If it turns into a big thing, it’s better to get out than to keep your feelings bottled up indefinitely.

21. Do you support her passions?

You don’t have to share them, or even understand them. I get pretty passionate about schedules and planners and journals, where my girlfriend would rather live each day completely separate from past and future events. But she supports my planning nature, and she allows me to plan for her a little, too. (It brings me joy.) The woman you’re meant to marry is going to have her own things that are important to her. Can you stick by them?

22. Do you trust her?

Trust is one of the most important components in a healthy relationship, and while insecurities are sure to arise from time to time, you should generally trust the things your partner tells you. If your partner has destroyed your trust, or if your trust is still damaged from a previous partner, you’re probably not going to last very long – better to save your money and not get married.

23. Is she a good person?

We tend to back our girlfriends up, no matter what, but realistically we can tell if they’re good people or not. Would you stick up for her even if you weren’t romantically involved? Knowing what you know about her now, would you have still gone on that first date, if you had to do it all over again?

24. Are you attracted to her?

Your partner doesn’t need to be exactly your type – after all, this is usually a pretty arbitrary guess about what we really want. But you shouldn’t be in a relationship with someone you’re not attracted to. This attraction isn’t necessarily on the physical level – in fact, it shouldn’t just be on a physical level – but it should still be there.

25. Are you her partner or her parent?

The letters may be the same, but the feelings couldn’t be more different. Taking care of your partner is all good and well, but if you feel like you have to raise her – for whatever reason – you will grow tired of it after a while. Imagine having kids with this person – would she help you out, or would she just be another child to take care of?

26. Is she your parent or partner?

It needs to go both ways. You should both be taking care of each other, and on fairly equal ground as far as maturity goes. Neither of you should feel the need to handle business on behalf of the other one. Trust me, it’ll get old – fast.

27. Will you take care of her when she’s sick?

I know I said that you shouldn’t be someone’s mother – but you should feel comfortable taking care of her when she needs it. Would you be willing to help her recover after a surgery, or even just a common cold? If the thought of helping her recover is not a pleasant one, she’s not the one for you.

28. Does she back you up?

You’re going to disagree sometimes – that’s a given. But you should be confident that your partner would have your back if you needed her to. She should support you and be on your team – even when you’re apart. If you rise together and fall alone, you’re doing it wrong.

29. Do you worry about a future without her?

It’s important that you want your partner to be a firm fixture in your life, and you should be willing to do what it takes (within reason) to make sure she stays. But you shouldn’t worry that things are temporary. If it doesn’t feel permanent, it might not be – so pay attention!

30. Do you feel lucky to have her in your life?

In a perfect marriage, both partners will feel like the other is out of their league – but neither should feel like they are superior, in any way. Maybe one of you is better at that one thing than the other one is, but you should celebrate these things – not compare who’s better at what. Take her strengths as your collective strengths. After all, she’s there to lift you up.

31. Are you willing to look past her mistakes?

Since no one is perfect, it’s understandable that there are going to be mistakes sometimes. You should be able to say with absolute certainty that her little mistakes won’t be held against her forever. There are, of course, big mistakes that are hard to look past – but these mistakes are generally the downfall of a relationship anyway and shouldn’t be looked past. There is a fine line between “ride or die” and “sticking around for a trainwreck”.

32. Do you want to marry her, or do you think you have to?

Some people get engaged because it’s the “next logical step” in their relationship. But, realistically, not every relationship is supposed to end up in marriage. There are some people who have pledged lifelong devotion to each other but never been legally married. Likewise, there are marriages that only lasted a few months. Obviously, “commitment” and “marriage” are not mutually exclusive. Do you actually want to pledge your life to this woman, and get the government involved, or do you just think you need to because “that’s what you do”? If it’s the latter, rethink your situation – is she worth all this trouble for something you don’t even want?

33. How does this situation make you feel?

Your intuition is one of the best tools in your arsenal, so to speak – go with it. If your gut tells you this relationship is wrong (for example, if you’re not actually going through this list with your partner, but by yourself, because you’re afraid of what you’ll find out), it’s probably best to listen to it. Either the relationship really is wrong, or you have too many insecurities to be in a relationship right now.

34. Did you actually answer these questions together?

If you were afraid to go through this list with your partner, for whatever reason, the two of you don’t belong together. Part of your brain probably already knew this, which is why you didn’t want to go over it together. Right? There shouldn’t be any secrets between you and your future spouse – and that includes doubts about the relationship. If you’re not confident that your relationship is meant to stand the test of time, it’s probably not, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with that. It’s only wrong if you’re denying your incompatibility – no one deserves to be lied to, even to save their feelings.

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New Dutch Study Says Queer Women More Likely To Divorce, Than Gay Men

According to the national statistics office in the Netherlands – the CBS -women are more likely to get married than men, but their marriages are more likely to break down.

Holland became the first country in the world to approve same sex weddings, when the first same-sex couples tied the knot on April 1, 2001.

Since then, nearly 700 lesbian couples and 500-600 gay couples have gotten married in the country every year.

Of them, around 200 female and 100 male couples will get divorced, the CBS said.

Of the 580 weddings between two women sealed in 2005, 30% had ended 10 years later.

Among men, the 10-year divorce rate is around 15%. One in five weddings between a man and woman ends in divorce.

One reason for the low divorce rate among gay men could be the fact they tend to get married when older, the CBS said.

One in five gay men is over the age of 55 when he gets married.

Acceptance Tanja Ineke, chairwoman of the LGBT rights lobby group COC, told broadcaster Nos that the higher divorce rate among women may be because lesbians are less accepted.

There is more attention paid to discrimination involving gay men. Discrimination against women is less visible but certainly exists. Lesbians often feel they are taken less seriously.’

Despite the divorce rate, there is reason for celebration, she said.

15 years ago the Netherlands was the first country to allow same sex couples to get married. Since then, 20 countries have followed suit. And that is really great.’

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Thoughts You Have When All Your Friends Are Getting Married

I have a lot of married friends. Maybe it’s because I mostly hang around with people who are much older than me.

Or at least, that’s what I used to think. Lately, though, more and more of my younger friends have been getting married.

I think part of it might have something to do with gay marriage being legalized here – those friends who were waiting until all of us could be married, don’t have to wait anymore.

Maybe it’s because the gay friends can get married now, and a few of them already have.

It seems fast to me, but I’m not one to judge their paths – if they’re ready to get married, that’s wonderful for them – and really, I’m so happy for you, but…

Are you sure you’re ready for such a big commitment?

I feel like a lot of people laugh off the commitment that is “marriage”. Okay, maybe seeing it as a lifelong institution worked better when people only lived to the grand-old age of 40, but if your options are “break up or get married”, maybe that’s not the right reason to get married.

Have you thought about the changes your life will face?

I’ve dated people who genuinely believed that, once you married someone, you pretty much owed them frequent sex and home-cooked meals every night. That’s great, if that’s what you both want, but marriage doesn’t take away autonomy.

Have you guys even lived with each other yet?

I know the verdict is still out on this one, but I couldn’t imagine marrying someone I’d never even lived with. Can you imagine – spending no more than three days at a time together, and then suddenly you’re pledging to spend the rest of your lives together? I couldn’t.

Have you had sex yet?

This is another issue that’s a bit divided. There are so many good reasons for not having sex with someone, so anyone who feels they should wait until they’re married is definitely entitled to stay with that thought. But if you haven’t at least talked about sex with your partner, how will you know if you’re compatible? I think abstaining-until-marriage typically works out best with two people who both want to wait until they’re married.

Why are you in such a hurry?

Listen, everyone. The institution of marriage has been around for a long time – it’s not going anywhere anytime soon. And if you’re worried that some morally bankrupt politician is going to come in and screw everything up, well… You might even be right. But in most cases, marriages aren’t a have to situation, and if you’re rushing into it just because you have to, you’re not having a marriage – you’re just having a wedding.

What are you getting out of this?

For a long time, I thought being married meant tax breaks – but then I found out that’s not necessarily the case for poor people like me. I thought that being married meant a bunch of things that it doesn’t always mean. Even when you’re married, if you don’t have the support of whoever is backing the benefit you’re hoping to get (no matter why you don’t get their support), you’re out of luck. There are other criteria to meet.

Are you really sure?

Okay, I already asked this, but seriously it’s so important I’m going to ask it again. Are you actually sure you’re ready to be someone’s wife? Once you get married, you’re either married or divorced – “single” isn’t exactly a thing anymore. (Not that there is anything wrong with being a divorcee – but it’s not for everyone.)

Can you really handle risking half your stuff?

I know, the cliché is dated and most people don’t really take half of their ex’s stuff when they split. And then, of course, there are the people like me, who tend to hand off a certain portion of my stuff after a breakup (my exes usually invite themselves to it, actually). But could you handle the thought of her having every legal right to claim half of everything you owned – and sticking you with half of her debt, in some cases? That’s just not enough personal control for me.

If you don’t hate me yet, then I offer you congratulations.

Just because I’m too much of a control freak to get married right now, the institution of marriage is something that a lot of people dream of their whole lives. While it might be a little silly on the surface, I can’t pretend to understand how things are for you – I can only look at things from my perspective. Maybe you think like me and maybe you don’t. But that doesn’t mean I’m not totally happy for your wedding – as long as you’re not the type to go on and on about how much different your life is after you’re married. Yes, I know it’ll be different. That’s why I don’t want to get married yet.

As long as we can agree to keep the taunts to a minimum – don’t tell me how great being married is, and I won’t tell you how great not being married is – then I’m definitely going to be at your stupid wedding. I’ll be the one right in front taking most of the pictures.

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Third Japanese City Recognises Same-Sex Unions

In a decision announced this week, Mie Prefecture in the city of Iga has said it will be issuing partnership certificates to same-sex couples from April.

This makes the region the third in Japan and first outside of Tokyo to take such a step.

Municipal officers have said they hope the move will help to reduce discrimination and ensure people in relationships have their rights protected.

Last year, the mayor of the ward, Sakae Okamoto, said he planned to bring forward the certificates, but had instructed officials to investigate the best way of going forward.

In statement released, a municipal official said

We were aware of the statistics showing that 7.6% of Japan’s population identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. We concluded that if the figures are reflected here, presumably hovering around 5 to 7%, we need to do our utmost to protect the rights of such minorities.”

He added that because Shibuya and Setagaya wards in Tokyo have already taken such steps, it inspired them to follow suit.

Although these certificates are not legally binding, businesses and hospitals are being asked to honour them in the same way they would a marriage licence.

Officials have said in order for couples to be eligible, both partners have to be at least 20-years-old and reside in the city.

The will also be required to submit evidence that they are single and sign a written declaration.

Recent polls in Japan have shown that a majority of people are in favour of marriage equality.

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Saying Your “I Do’s”: Helpful Wedding Vow Ideas

Your wedding day is the special opportunity to announce to the world (okay, maybe just your family and friends) your love, devotion, and commitment to your partner.

So what in the world are you going to say when it’s time to say your wedding vows? Don’t worry, we’re here to help.

And while your vows are best said from your heart, here’s a look at some tips to help give you a little bit of inspiration when it comes to declaring your love to your new wife…

Start with Brainstorming

Grab and pen and paper and write down all of the reasons why you want to spend the rest of your life with your girl. You can chose a serious tone or keep it light-hearted and humorous…depending on your vibe as a couple.

Be Yourself

If you’re the romantic, then by all means, pour on the sentiment. If sticking with tradition is more your thing, then go with a more traditional wedding vow. And if you’re a jokester, then make your vows humorous. The point here is to always be yourself when writing your vows…that’s who she fell in love with in the first place, isn’t it?

Don’t be Afraid to Use Quotes

Is there a specific song lyric or line of a poem that says what you feel perfectly? Or maybe you want to include lines from the first movie you two saw together. If it has sentimental value or will remind her of a fun moment you two shared together, then you should totally add it to the vows. It’s sure to bring a smile to her lips.

Edit and Rewrite

Read over what you’ve written and cut out things that aren’t vital. It’s a good idea to try to keep it under three minutes…anything longer might start to seem like rambling. Have a friend or family member go over the vows with you to see how they sound. They can also tell you if the vows sound like your personality or if you’re trying too hard to impress and something’s getting lost in all of the words.

Practice

Say your vows out loud before the ceremony. Practice does make perfect after all. If you’re thinking of memorizing them, just be sure to have a copy handy in case you get too nervous in front of your beautiful bride and forget everything you were going to say.

Speak From the Heart

She’ll know it’s coming from the heart, so there’s no need to try to impress with fancy words or too many love poem quotes. Just be you and let your heart do the talking. It writes the best vows anyway!

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Capturing The Big Day: Tips For Finding A Great Wedding Photographer

Finding the perfect wedding photographer can sometimes be a stressful part of your wedding planning.

And it’s definitely going to be an investment in both time and money; yet most newly married couples will most likely agree that finding the perfect match in a photographer is worth the hassle.

But choosing a photographer to capture you and your partner’s big day doesn’t have to be as stressful as it may sound. With some planning ahead and a real vision of what the two of you want out of your wedding shots, you’ll be much more likely to find the right photographer to shoot your big day.

Here’s a look at some helpful tips to make finding that perfect wedding photographer a whole lot easier…

Settle on a Photography Style

Before you begin your photographer search, first you and your partner need to decide what type of photography style or look you want with your photos.

Are you looking for a more candid style, catching each other and your guest in the moment, or would you prefer the classic portrait type of shoot? Maybe you’d like a mix of both?

The point here is that some photographers may specialize in a specific shoot style, so make sure you know what you and your future wife want before choosing a photographer.

Do Your Homework

When it comes to finding the perfect photographer, research and word of mouth are the best ways to find the right one to shoot your wedding. Check out potential photographers’ websites and blogs, as their style will most likely show here, and they will probably also have samples of their work to look through as well.

It’s also a good idea to talk to married friends to see who they would recommend.

Remember the LGBT Factor

You need to know up front if potential photographers are willing to shoot a same-sex marriage. If he or she doesn’t state whether or not they shoot all types of weddings, be sure to call to find out.

You don’t want to find yourselves thinking you’ve found the perfect photographer only to find out they are too close-minded to shoot a wedding with two brides.

Set up Interviews and Request Portfolios

After you’ve narrowed down your list of potential photographers, now it’s time to meet with them to get a feel for how they would shoot your wedding. Be prepared to talk about your wedding style, your venue, and what you and your partner want out of your photos.

And be sure to check out their portfolios since that’s what’s really going to let you know if you like their photography style.

Make Sure Your Personalities Match

Sure, it’s not the photographer you’re marrying, but both of you should like him or her and actually bond with them. For instance, was one of your potential photographers instantly excited with your wedding vision and was already offering ideas too?

This is somebody you’ll have to be comfortable with shadowing your every move and capturing intimate shots, so it’s definitely important that you and your photographer click.

Once you’ve chosen a photographer, don’t forget to confirm him or her for your wedding day. Now you and your future wife to be will have one less thing to stress about when it comes to the wedding planning.

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Image source: Ali & Meenoo // Philadelphia, Pennsylvania // Photos courtesy of Tara Beth Photography

Destination of the Week: Buenos Aires

This week we’re headed for South America and one of Latin America’s gay capitals: Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Long before same-sex marriage was legalized in the country in 2010, the Argentine capital city had long been a magnet for gay travelers, with plenty of nightlife, culture, and the largest Pride parade you’re likely to find in South America.

Although South America still has a very long way to go when it comes to gay rights, including Argentina as a whole, LGBT travelers will still find a welcoming vibe in Buenos Aries.

So whether you’re looking for a few authentic tango lessons, or want to check out the unique vibe of the city, here’s a look at reasons why Buenos Aires should definitely be on your travel destination list…

Awesome Architecture and History

Argentina has a long, and sometimes sordid history, and plenty of architecture to go with it. So if you’re a fan of either…or both, then you’ll definitely find plenty to see in the city.

There are some great walking tours available that focus on the architecture of Buenos Aires. The Casa Rosada and the Teatro Colon are just a few cool buildings to check out. And if you’re into art, don’t miss the Museo Nacional de Bellas Artes, where you’ll not only find important works from Argentine artists, but also from European masters like Cezanne, Degas, Picasso, and Rembrandt.

The Great Outdoors

If you’re a fan of outdoor activities, or just love being out in nature, Argentina offers a world of possibilities. So after you’ve take in all of Buenos Aires, consider a side trip in other parts of the country.

Wine lovers should check out Mendoza, an area known for producing some of the best wines in the world. And if you’re looking for adventure, head down to Patagonian, where glaciers and plenty of adventure awaits. Argentina is also home to the world’s widest waterfalls: Iguazu Falls.

Evita

Maybe you’ve only heard of Evita from the musical, but this real life woman played an important role in shaping Argentina’s politics and history. She was even a part of the movement to help get women the right to vote!

Check out the Evita Museum for a more in depth look at this intriguing lady. You can also look for her grave in another popular tourist attraction in Buenos Aires: Cementerio de la Recoleta.

Diverse Nightlife

There’s a little something for everyone when it comes to gay nightlife in Buenos Aires. Whether you’re looking for a lively dance club, or a more subdued and low key type of setting, you’ll definitely find something in the city.

For a more relaxed atmosphere, check out the Pride Café. It’s got a warm and welcoming vibe and not only serves coffee, but alcohol as well.

Tango

Buenos Aires and tango are pretty much synonymous with each other, and let’s face it…watching two women tango is sexy as hell. So while you’re in Buenos Aires, you’ll definitely want to either go to a tango show (often times there are dinner and dance show options) or why not take a few tango lessons yourself? You definitely haven’t truly experienced Argentina until you’ve taken part in tango in some shape or form.

Have you traveled to Buenos Aires and have suggestions on things to do or see? Let us know in the comments below so future travelers can make the most of their trip!

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The Lesbian Engagement Ring Selfie: Tips For The Perfect Shot

In this day and age, ruled by social media, it’s pretty much a given that you’re going to share a huge life moment with all of your “friends.” And showing off your engagement ring is no exception.

It’s a great way to get the world out there, especially to far away friend and family, that you’re now engaged.

This means you’ve got to put some planning into that engagement ring selfie. You’re going to post one anyway, so why not give them something to ooh and ahh over?

Here’s a look at some helpful tips for getting that perfect engagement ring selfie shot….

Remove Other Jewelry

Your engagement ring is the star of the show, so you shouldn’t have any other jewelry on for your shot. Any other rings or even a bracelet will be competing with your ring, which should be the center of attention since you are announcing to the world that you’re getting married!

Choose Proper Lighting

Yes, this may sound a bit technical and something reserved for professional photographers, but lighting plays a big key in how your ring will look in the picture. Soft, natural lighting will make your ring really look its best. The best lighting is on a cloudy day or after 4pm so you can avoid harsh shadows while still having the benefit of natural lighting.

Play Around with Angles

Make sure you’re showing your ring at its best by playing around with different angles. Try angling your ring to the side to put more focus on it. Also capture the angle that best shows off what makes it unique. Perhaps it has a captivating stone or a special detail in the setting. Experiment with your angles to see which way showcases your ring the best.

Don’t Zoom

This will compromise the quality of the photo. Hold the camera at an arm’s length to get the best, most detailed shot. You can always crop it from there. Using zoom risks having a more pixilated shot, which can take away the detail of the ring.

Notice Your Background

Use the background of your selfie to help engage intrigue about the proposal. Did she propose on the beach or while you were on vacation? Then maybe you can capture the perfect ring selfie with a heart drawn in the sand and the surf coming in. If you were proposed to on vacation, pick a famous landmark and take your selfie with it as the backdrop. Not only will it make for great shot, but it will also capture the memory of being proposed to.

Have a Steady Hand and Use Focus

You definitely don’t want to end up with a blurry picture of what looks like it could be a ring. Keep your hands steady while taking the shot. If you’re using your cell phone, take advantage of the camera’s burst mode, which snaps several frames per second so you can chose which one came out the best. And with proper focus, your shot will look all the more professional.

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Married With Children: How to Include Your Kids in Your Wedding

Whether you’ve been together for a long time and finally have the opportunity to tie the knot where you live, or you’ve just decided the timing is right to propose to your girlfriend, involving your children in your union will make it all the more special.

By including your children in your big day, you’ll not only give them plenty to be proud of, but also give them a renewed sense of assurance that you will all be committing to each other as a loving family.

And aside from the typical tradition of putting your kids in the bridal party, there are also other ideas that can be done either at the wedding ceremony, or in private as a family.

Here’s a look at some ways to get your children involved in your wedding plans…

Write Them Into Your Vows

This is a great way to make your kids feel special and included. And what better way to do that than when you’re speaking to each other from the heart while exchanging your vows.

Have Them Walk You Down the Aisle

This works especially well if your children are older, but there doesn’t have to be any sort of age limit either. It’s not written in stone that you have to have your father or parents walk you down the aisle. Why not make your child feel like a real part of something by allowing him or her to walk with you.

Let Them Make Something to Display

Kids love to be creative. And what better way to let them express their love for you than by allowing them to create something for your wedding to put on display. Or maybe they want to recite a poem for you and your partner. Whatever they have in mind, it will definitely come from the heart, and you’ll all be feeling the love all around.

Put Them in the Wedding as Bridesmaids and Groomsmen

Who says your bridal party has to consist of only adults? Having them be a part of the wedding party is the ultimate way to make them feel included. This works especially well if your child is too old to be a flower girl or ring bearer.

Have a Family Bridal Shower

Of course they can always come to the regular bridal shower too, but by throwing your own family bridal shower (you, your partner, and the children) you’ll be able to celebrate with each other in a more private manner. Let them plan a game or help with baking a cake with you. It’s a great way to bond as a family and make them feel included and a part of the wedding festivities.

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Destination of the Week: Amsterdam

“Live and let live” is one of Amsterdam’s favorite sayings, and with an overall relaxed and tolerant attitude towards different lifestyles, who wouldn’t want to give the Netherlands’ capital city a visit?

Not only was the Netherlands the first country in the world to legalize same-sex marriage in 2001, but it has a long history of fighting for gay rights.

In fact, homosexuality was decriminalized in Amsterdam all the way back in 1811! How’s that for being a pioneer in the LGBT movement! Here in the present day, Amsterdam continues to be one of the world’s top destinations for gay and lesbian travelers. With its vibrant gay nightlife and one of the most renowned Pride celebrations worldwide, it’s time to think about a trip to Amsterdam.

Here’s a look at some of the top reasons why the city should be on your LGBT travel destination list…

It’s so darn picturesque

No matter where you go in the city, it looks like one of those beautiful scenery post cards you send off to friends and family. With its 400 year old canals criss-crossed with a number of bridges, it’s like the Dutch version of Venice in Amsterdam. Along connecting canals and streets, you’ll find the quintessential cafes, shops, and galleries.

And if you visit in the winter, the canals provide an icy playground for some ice-skating fun. Although it’s definitely a modern city, you still get that vintage European feel while roaming around and discovering the sights.

The bicycles

Amsterdam is the most bicycle-friendly city. In fact, more people ride a bike to get where they need to go than any other form of transportation. Not only is it more convenient (with the city’s relatively small size, many streets are closed to cars), but it helps keep Amsterdam a lot less polluted than most urban settings.

One of the best ways for visitors to discover the city is by bike. It’s relatively safe and bicycle group tours are available. It’s definitely a unique way to see the sights and take in the Dutch capital from a new perspective!

Awesome art scene

First of all, there’s the Van Gogh Museum, which houses 200 paintings and 500 drawings by the famous Dutch artist. You’ll also find Japanese paintings there as well as works by Van Gogh one-time collaborator, Gauguin. Art lovers should also check out the Stedelijk Museum, where you’ll find an amazing collection of 20th and 21st century artists. Works by Chagall, Matisse, Cezanne, and Picasso can be found here.

You can also take a look at post-1945 artists like De Kooning, Lichtenstein, Judd, Stella, and Warhol. Lovers of modern art should plan a trip to the Jordaan district, where you’ll find about 40 specialist galleries occupying former shops or homes.

Amsterdam Pride

It’s one of the largest (and arguable best) Pride celebrations worldwide and attracts more than 350,000 participants. You’ll definitely find plenty to do at the festivities, including film screenings, dance parties, sporting events, exhibitions, and debates. In fact, there are usually over 170 events to check out. And…you can’t miss the world-famous Canal Parade!

Plenty of Nightlife

Amsterdam’s gay and lesbian bars and clubs have a little something for everyone. Whether you’re looking to lounge around with friends for some good conversation at a low key bar, or are looking to dance the night away, you’ll definitely find no shortage of the gay nightlife in the city.

Have you been to Amsterdam and have some travel tips our sights to recommend? Let us know in the comments below!

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Location, Location, Location: 5 Tips for Picking the Perfect Wedding Venue

If you and your girlfriend recently got engaged, chances are one of the things you’ve been thinking about is where to tie the knot.

Choosing a wedding venue is definitely one of the most important parts of the planning since it does dictate pretty much everything else involved with the ceremony like decorations and the size of your guest list.

Here are a few major tips to consider when it comes to picking out the perfect venue for you and your future wife…

Estimate Your Budget

How much are you willing to spend on your wedding venue? The venue will most likely take a large chunk out of your budget (unless you’re looking for a simple location like the backyard of your parents’ house), then you most likely won’t have to worry about large venue costs.

But if you’re looking for something else, be sure to shop around at the type of venue you’re looking for to see what the average cost is.

That way you’ll be sure to budget enough money for your location.

Figure out Your Wedding Day Style

The wedding style you and your partner envision having will definitely play a role in where you decide to have your wedding. You’ll also need to determine if you want a traditional or more non-traditional venue.

Plenty of traditional venues are most likely going to be well-equipped to handle a wedding, whereas a more non-traditional venue may require you to be responsible for a bit more of the details.

For example, most wedding ready venues often provide tables, chairs, linens, and a clean-up crew, and a non-traditional space may not provide all of that, so you’ll have to make sure to include those expenses not included into your budget.

Visit Potential Venues More Than Once

Once the two of you have finally narrowed it down to a few potential venues, it’s time to revisit each of those venues to see which one resonates with you and your partner the most. Do the venues have the same charm as before? Are they big enough to accommodate all of your guests? Do they fit your intended wedding style?

It’s also a good idea to visit the venues around the same time of day you intend to have your wedding, that way you can see how the lighting and all around look of the place is for when you’ll be taking pictures. Visit each finalist venue a couple of times if you need too.

That way you’ll be more than sure of your perfect choice.

Have a Guest List Estimate in Mind

How many guest to you plan to invite to your wedding? You’ll need to make sure your choice of venue will be able to accommodate however many people you decide to invite.

If you and your partner want a small wedding, then it’s probably not a good idea to rent out a banquet hall. But that banquet hall could work perfectly if you intend on inviting a lot of people.

So it’s definitely a good idea to at least have an estimate about your guest list before you start looking for a venue.

Be Sure to Check About Religious Ceremony Requirements

If you intend to have a religious wedding ceremony, you’ll need to first find out if you’re required to have the ceremony in a house of worship. If your religious leader is able to come to a venue, then you don’t have to worry as much about this.

However, you do need to make sure he or she would be available around the time of year you and your partner want to get married.

5 Great Wedding Destinations for Lesbian Couples

Are you and your partner considering a destination wedding? With more and more countries finally coming to their senses by making same-sex marriage legal, it might be the perfect opportunity to travel to a place you two have always wanted to go while getting married at the same time.

Whether you’re looking for an exotic wedding destination or one that’s a bit more off the beaten path, here’s a look at 5 destinations that could make your nuptials all the more special…

Tahiti

Same-sex marriage became legal on this tropical paradise island in 2013. Known for its romantic setting with thatched roofed huts dotting the blue-green lagoons, it’s the perfect place to get hitched if you’re looking for a tropical wedding destination.

Who wouldn’t want to walk hand in hand with their new wife along the chalk-white sands as you enjoy the views from your island bungalow, right?

Iceland

It’s pretty much the complete opposite from Tahiti, but just as beautiful with some pretty much amazing scenery. Iceland has a thriving LGBT community, and same-sex marriage was legalized in 2010, making it a great wedding destination.

And with the numerous thermal pools, hot springs, active volcanoes, and snow-covered glaciers, you and your new wife will have plenty of great outdoor adventures to and sights to see after the wedding.

Cape Town, South Africa

It’s known as Africa’s gayest city, which is saying a lot since quite a lot of the African continent is still very homophobic. Same-sex marriage was legalized in this South African country in 2006, so they definitely know how to roll out the gay-friendly red carpet.

Not to mention, the city is very beautiful and picturesque. From the flat-topped mountains, sculpture-lined parks, golden beaches, and eccentric mix of cultures, you’ll find plenty to do here. And don’t forget about taking your new wife on a safari or penguin spotting outing!

Buenos Aires, Argentina

It’s one of Latin America’s gayest capital cities, and also one of the most tolerant. Same-sex marriage was legalized in Argentina in 2006, making it one of the few South American countries that allow it.

There’s definitely plenty of culture here. Whether you’re looking to take a wine-tasting tour to sample some of the famous Malbec wine and other varieties, or want to visit the grave of the iconic Evita, the city is full of vibrant history and sights to see. And don’t forget those tango lessons. What a better way to celebrate your marriage than with a sultry tango with your new wife!

Queenstown, New Zealand

If you and your partner are all about adventure, then you should definitely consider a wedding in this picturesque city. It’s a popular resort area, and is known for its daredevil sports. So after you say “I do,” you and your wife can do a little whitewater rafting, skydiving, bungee jumping, and jet boating.

Same sex marriage was legalized in New Zealand in 2013, so don’t miss out on getting married in this beautiful country, especially if you both love the outdoors!

Total Bridezilla – My Best Friend’s Fiancée is Killing Our Friendship | We Answer Your Questions

We aim to get to the heart of your sex and relationship problems, so if you need advice, please contact us.

Q: Total Bridezilla – My Best Friend’s Fiancée is Killing Our Friendship

Dear KitschMix,

I love my best friend, and I was thrilled when she asked me to help her and her fiancé plan their wedding, but her wife-to-be is a total bridezilla and it’s straining my relationship with my friend.

What do I do?

A: This can be a tough situation to be in. It can be really hard for someone to choose between their friends and their relationships sometimes, and this is especially true when it comes to the subject of weddings. After all, weddings are a time of love – and for some people, this can turn into a bit of a competition.

I don’t know very many details about your situation, so I’ll outline the basics as best as I can. Each is to be considered a unique option – for the most part, you won’t really need to use more than one tactic. Of course, use your best discretion based on the more specific information.

Can you back out of the planning process?

We often think of wedding parties as being finalized – but the truth is, they can be changed at any time. It’s not like you are under contract. Your friend might be a little hurt that you no longer want to help, but most likely she knows about her wife-to-be’s ways and will understand (even if it takes some time).

Can you talk to your best friend about it?

If you don’t think your best friend realizes how crazy her lady is being, maybe you can find a way to politely bring it to her attention. For example, instead of presenting it how you said it to me, try instead “Wife’s name is being a bit demanding on ____, do you think you could talk to her about it?” Sometimes this means that you’re asking her to curtail the bad behavior, but really what you’re looking for is a solution – the solution might be that your friend negotiates with her future wife on your behalf.

Can you deal with it?

Sometimes, in cases where someone thinks a bride is being a bridezilla, it’s a simple misunderstanding – the wedding guests feel that they should have more say than they do. I don’t know what your situation entails, but if you think she’s being unreasonable based on things that are her own preference (such as she has to have the exact right dress, or she has to have this special cake, or a magical venue)… Well, I’m sorry, but the problem could be you. If it’s something that she deeply cares about, suck it up!

Can you negotiate?

If you don’t want to quit your planning position completely, but you feel that the bride is demanding too much of your time, you have absolutely every right to speak up about it. After all, just like I said in the first option – this isn’t a job, it’s not a contract, the only person who has to plan the wedding is the couple getting married. Negotiate with her on an amount of time that you’re comfortable putting into the planning process, and go from there. She might not be happy about it, but she has no right to be demanding with you and you should stick up for yourself.

Keep in mind that this also applies to money spent – if the brides are not paying for the wedding expenses themselves, they must be flexible, or you have the right to walk away.

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Costa Rica’s First Lesbian Wedding Briefly Happened Due To Clerical Error

A Costa Rican woman was able to marry her girlfriend because her birth certificate records her as male.

In 1991, when Jazmin Elizondo Arias was born, someone made a mistake and noted on her birth certificate that she was male, and no one corrected the record officially due to the drawn out administration involved.

Nearly 25 years later – thanks to the simple clerical error – Elizondo was able to become one half of the first same-sex couple to marry legally in Costa Rica – at least briefly.

Elizondo and her partner Laura Florez-Estrada Pimentel married quietly on 25 July; their news became Costa Rican news only last week after they received their marriage certificate.

The publicity prompted an unusually quick response by Civil Registry officials, who reviewed Elizondo’s records, reclassified her as a woman and annulled the marriage. They also opened criminal complaints against the women and Marco Castillo, the lawyer, for allegedly performing an “impossible marriage”.

Florez-Estrada said.

It’s clear the Civil Registry moved out of hate, because they not only annulled the marriage but filed this criminal complaint,”

According to Costa Rican law, knowingly entering into a marriage where there is an impediment carries a possible prison sentence of six months to three years.

While Elizondo and Florez-Estrada await possible prosecution, the Constitutional Court is considering the case of another gay couple, whose relationship was recognised as a “de facto union” by a family judge on 2 July. Several versions of a bill proposing to recognise same-sex unions have been presented in congress, sparking fierce opposition from political parties with religious ties.

Florez-Estrada said the couple knew they could face legal problems if they went public with their marriage, but decided to do so anyway.

We had to make public that it was not our mistake. It is a question of basic rights.”

Destination Of The Week: Copenhagen

This week’s LGBT travel destination takes us a to a city that was given the honor of being the number one most gay-friendly place on the planet by the popular travel publication “Lonely Planet: Copenhagen.

Located in the small Scandinavian country of Denmark, Copenhagen is known for its eclectic cultural scene, great food, and of course, being welcoming to the LGBT crowd. And it’s not only the city that’s a great gay-friendly destination, Denmark itself was actually the first country in the world to recognize legal partnership status for same-sex couples.

Copenhagen’s laid back vibe carried over into the open-minded attitude towards…well everyone, not to mention it’s also a beautiful city with plenty of vibrant nightlife.

So let’s take a look at why Copenhagen should be high on your list of LGBT-friendly travel destinations…

Being Gay in Denmark Just Isn’t a Big Deal

The Danish have a very relaxed attitude when it comes to the LGBT population. Being gay just isn’t a big deal to them. Often times you’ll hear about open gay celebrities being praised for being role models for the LGBT community. Danes are pretty humble and reserved and tend to go about their lives with their famous laid back attitude, so you’re not going to have to worry about being singled out for being gay during your travels.

Great Cultural and Historic Options

If you’re a traveler who loves hitting up all of the museums when you visit a new city, or are just into history and culture, Copenhagen has plenty of great options to check out. The National Museum of Denmark is a must for history buffs, with exhibits from a whole range of periods including the Stone Age, Viking Age, and Modern Danish History. And if it’s art you’re looking for, you’ll find plenty in the city as well. You’ll also find the Open Air Museum…the oldest and largest open air museum in the world. So there’s definitely plenty of culture and history to soak up in this Danish city.

Castles!

…the Kronborg Castle, to be exact. You know…the one where Shakespeare’s “Hamlet” takes place. Okay, it’s not exactly located in Copenhagen, but it’s only a forty-five minute drive north…a drive that will definitely be worth it. This castle is huge and has a whole lot of history behind it. It’s a must see if you’re a fan of art, architecture, and history. The castle grounds are equally beautiful, so it’s well worth taking a day trip to Kronborg if you’re looking for a break from the city.

Food, Food…Food!

Foodie travelers…you most definitely have to schedule a trip to Copenhagen…and everyone else who just loves to eat! Danish cuisine has come a long way and is now a top sought after dining destination in Europe. Not only that, but you’ll also find the famous restaurant Noma in Copenhagen, which has been named as the world’s best restaurant several times. There are also plenty of cafes and bistros, as well as plenty of tasty options to fit almost any dining budget.

Vibrant Nightlife

Copenhagen has a wide range of nightlife options for the gay and lesbian crowd. If you’re looking for an exclusively lesbian club, head for Vela. There’s always something happening there pretty much any time of the day or night. Drinking, dancing, bar games, and kissing in the corners make this nightclub the happening place to check out. They also host cultural events at the club too like poetry and literature evening, live music, and speed-dating.

Copenhagen definitely has plenty to offer the LGBT traveler, and with so much history and culture mixed with a very accepting attitude, it’s a great place to visit and enjoy yourself. Have you traveled to the Danish capital? Tell us about your experience or any tips you have for making the most of a Copenhagen travel destination.

Will You Marry Me? 5 Tips for Planning The Perfect Proposal

Have you been thinking about popping the question to your girlfriend but aren’t quite sure where to start?

Sure, getting married is a bit deal, but planning the proposal is pretty darn important too.

So what’s a girl to do? Where should you start? And do you have to get an engagement ring?

One thing’s for sure…you should definitely make sure your proposal is something she’ll remember.

Here’s a look at 5 tips to help you plan that perfect proposal…

Decide on Ring or No Ring

While there’s nothing written in stone that it’s necessary to present her with a ring when proposing, it is traditional to do so. However, if you and your girl aren’t exactly into “tradition,” then it’s totally okay to skip asking her to marry you with a ring. And hey, if this is the girl you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, you probably already know by now if she’d want an engagement ring or not, right?

Plan Something Awesome

What’s your idea for the proposal? This is probably the most important part, since it will show your girl that you’ve been paying attention and truly get her. Think of a plan that is personal to you and your future wife. Perhaps you want to return to where you had your first date…whatever the idea is, by making it personal and really giving it some thought, you’re bound to get a yes from her.

Plan the Date and Location

You most definitely need to plan ahead when it comes to choosing when and where you want to ask her to marry you. Do you want to do it privately with something like a picnic on the beach? (Be sure to pack all of her favorite foods for bonus points) Or are you thinking about going to your favorite restaurant on your anniversary to pop the question there? Choose a location and a date that’s going to mean the most to you both, and if you do choose a restaurant, it’s always a fun idea to get the wait staff involved in your happy moment too.

Speak From Your Heart

This always tends to work a lot better than trying to rehearse a speech or recite something you’ve tried to memorize right before you actually propose. Chances are your nerves are going to get the best of you anyway, so why not just tell her what your heart is feeling. Words from the heart are always the most romantic and endearing, and she’ll definitely have a hard time saying anything but yes when she looks at the true love in your eyes.

Celebrate!

She said yes! Awesome…now it’s time to celebrate. Getting engaged is a huge deal. It’s definitely not something that’s going to happen to you every day. So don’t just sit there in your engagement bliss…get out there and celebrate, you future brides to be!

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Missouri Wedding Venue Turns Away Lesbian Couple Saying “Same-Sex Marriages Violate Our Religious Beliefs”

Another day – another beautiful couple to discriminated against.

A Missouri couple will not be able to host their wedding next year at the venue of their choice, as the owners do not support same-sex marriage.

The owners of the venue, told the couple they’re not welcome because they’re lesbians, according to a Missouri newspaper.

The news came as a shock to brides-to-be Rachel Cathey and Beverly Vaughn, when the women and Cathey’s mother toured the venue last week and came face-to-face with owner Sara Howell’s antigay beliefs.

Cathey told the Sedalia Democrat of the venue

It is stunning. It’s so pretty — we looked at each other and said ‘This is it, this is where we’re going to get married.’ We started talking about a place for the bride to get ready. Sara said ‘we have a bridal suite.’ I said, ‘We have two brides.’”

That’s when Howell dropped the bombshell that Heritage Ranch does not permit same-sex weddings at the venue.

Cathey told the paper.

Before she could even finish I asked why and she said ‘because we’re Christian and we don’t,’”

Howell’s husband, Josh, who co-owns Heritage Ranch, explained to the Democrat why the facility doesn’t allow same-sex marriages:

It is a violation of our religious beliefs. We would have to violate our conscious to allow that to occur here. We feel we would be dishonoring God, who we serve and He was the one who gave us this business and it is only right we serve him and honor him with it. It would be a sin for us to allow that, so we could not in good conscious do that.

It’s not a personal matter. It’s a matter of religious conviction and personal belief.”

Josh Howell said the couple has turned away one other couple due to their Christian beliefs. Now the victimizers are playing the victim, complaining they have been on the receiving end of telephone and social media hate messages.

We’ve had several hateful messages over the phone and social media since the article was published and we found it very hypocritical they criticized us for being hateful and then follow that up with hateful comments toward us,”

Howell told the paper he and his wife are within their rights to deny service to Cathey, as the event venue is housed on private property, though it is accessible to the public.

Meanwhile, Cathey and Vaughn have received the backing of a statewide LGBT group, Promoting Equality for All Missourians, otherwise known as PROMO.

PROMO Interim Director Steph Perkins told the Democrat.

We are working to pass the Missouri Non-discrimination Act, known as MONA. It would add sexual orientation and gender identity as protected categories to the Human Rights Statute that protects against discrimination in employment, housing, access to public services. Businesses that are open to the public — provide public accommodation — currently cannot deny service based on race, religion (and national origin, ancestry, gender or age). With MONA that would include sexual orientation and gender identity.”

Missouri is one of 27 states that do not have non-discrimination laws to protect LGBT citizens, and no federal legislation currently exists to protect LGBT people from discrimination in employment, housing, or public accommodation.

Destination of the Week: San Francisco

This week’s LGBT destination pick takes travelers to the “Gay Mecca” of the U.S. …also known as San Francisco. It’s been called the world’s most gay-friendly city and has been known for its liberal, laid-back, and alternative lifestyles. So it’s no wonder this northern California city has long been a welcoming place for the LGBT crowd.

From the famous Castro district to more than sixty gay bars and clubs, there’s definitely plenty for the LGBT crown to discover in San Francisco. So if you’re looking for a great gay-friendly destination in a city with plenty of history, culture, and awesome scenery, it’s time to plan a trip to the City by the Bay.

Here’s a look at why San Francisco should definitely be on your LGBT destination radar…

Iconic Landmarks

Of course there’s the Golden Gate Bridge, Alcatraz, and Fisherman’s Wharf to check out while you’re there. But aside from these famous iconic landmarks, there are plenty of other great sights to check out while in the city too. Check out the historic Fairmont hotel, which was one of the only buildings to survive the devastating 1906 earthquake. There’s also the Castro Theater in heart of the city’s gay neighborhood. It’s one of only a handful of 1920s era movie theaters still in operation. And don’t forget to check out one of the major icons of San Francisco…the cable cars!

Awesome Scenery

Because the city is so hilly, there are plenty of great views to be seen, especially of the Golden Gate Bridge and the bay. Take the time to explore the city on foot. You never know what kind of great views you might come across. Check out Coit Tower for some incredible views of the city, Lands End Lookout for some amazing scenic vistas and the Golden Gate Bridge, and Twin Peaks Summit for a great view of the city on a clear day…just to name a few.

Eclectic Nightlife Choices

When it comes to nightlife in San Francisco, this city pretty much has it all. From gay and lesbian bars to disco diva dance clubs and drag shows…there’s definitely something for everyone in the LGBT crowd here. So don’t be afraid to let loose and dance the night away while you’re there.

The Castro

This historic neighborhood is an LGBT tourist attraction in itself because of its long standing gay identity. If you decide to visit in late October, you’ll find the city’s longest running street fair (founded by Harvey Milk), with plenty of crafts, drag shows, great music, food, and drink. And it wouldn’t be the Castro without a pride celebration. During pride month, the Castro comes even more alive (if that’s even possible) with plenty of display of LGBT power. There are also plenty of nightlife choices to experience in the neighborhood too.

Great Foodie Destination

You name it, and it can probably be found in one of the wealth of restaurants in the city. Whether you’re into global cuisine, trying new things, or are looking for local specialties, the foodie traveler will definitely find themselves stuffed before running out of food options. The LGBT crowd will also find plenty of gay-friendly restaurants, cafes, and other eateries as well, so when you come to San Francisco, be sure to come with an appetite!

There’s no doubt that San Francisco has plenty to offer the LGBT traveler. Have you been to San Francisco? Let us know what your favorite thing to do there are in the comments below!

Ring Shopping 101: Tips for Picking out the Perfect Wedding Bands

You’ve popped the question, and she said yes. Now it’s time to get into the whirlwind mode of wedding planning. Sure you’ll have to set a date, pick out a venue, figure out what to wear…but what about the wedding rings? It’s never too early to think about the sort of wedding bands you and your future wife would like to wear…for the rest of your life. So yeah, shopping for your rings is pretty important. Don’t know where to start? Here’s a look at some helpful tips to help get you on the right track to picking out the perfect wedding bands…

Decide on a Style

Are you and your girl a traditional sort of couple, or are you more of a couple who says to hell with tradition and do your own thing? Think about your style and how you want your wedding bands to represent you and her. It’s also important to figure out if you want to get matching bands or not. While that’s a popular choice, many couples also choose to pick out different bands for each other.

Figure out a Budget

While you don’t want to go broke spending all your hard-earned money on wedding bands, you also want to make sure you choose something that is going to last and be with you always. Decide on a budget together and be sure to stick with it. Don’t forget you’re going to have many more wedding expenses to consider when planning your budget for the rings.

Know Your Ring Materials

Do you prefer gold or silver? White gold or platinum. What about diamonds or another precious stone? There’s no rule that says a wedding band has to be made out of a certain material. These days even titanium and stainless steel are gaining popularity. Some couples have even chosen the ring tattoo route. The point here is to go with what you like and with something that shows your unique personality.

Shop at Least 3 Month Before the Ceremony

This gives you plenty of time to shop around and really get a feel for what you and your girl like. There are plenty of choices out there, so you may need time to narrow it down, or maybe you’ll fall in love at first sight with a ring your first time shopping. Just be sure to give yourself enough time to make your choice and get the rings properly sized so that they’ll be all ready for the big day.

Have Fun!

Not only will you be spending time with your future wife picking out something vital to the wedding ceremony, but you’ll also be having a blast doing it. You can even make a weekend getaway trip out of your wedding band shopping. Have fun and don’t forget what the purpose of the rings is really about…you and her committing to each other.

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Tokyo Issues Japan’s First Same-Sex Marriage Certificate To This Beautiful Couple

Holding rainbow fans and grinning from ear to ear, couple – Koyuki Higashi, 30, and Hiroko Masuhara, 37 – were photographed in Tokyo this week with a very special document clutched in their hands: a marriage certificate officially recognising their same-sex union.

According to CNN, it’s the first of its kind in Japan.

Higashi, a Japanese model and television personality turned LGBT activist and her partner of four years and fellow activist, Hiroko Matsuhara were married in Tokyo’s Shibuya ward on Thursday morning.

Shibuya’s legislators voted in March to grant marriage certificates to LGBT couples, making the ward the first in Japan to recognise same-sex unions. Setagaya, another of Tokyo’s 23 wards, voted to do the same a few months later.

The local ordinances recommend that same-sex couples be granted equal rights, including hospital visitations and apartment rentals.

Still, activists insist this is an important step forward for Japan, a country where LGBT issues remain taboo.

As CNN notes, despite “recognition and protection from some local governments, Japan still has no national laws protecting LGBT people from discrimination. Coming out can mean getting fired, evicted or denied healthcare.”

With her new wife by her side, Higashi said.

I’m so happy. When they gave us the certificate, I cried. Our friends cried.

I hope that this will be a step forward not only for Tokyo but for the whole of Japan to become a more comfortable place to live in, because there are LGBTs nationwide.”

Across Asia, LGBT rights are limited or in many cases, non-existent. In Southeast Asia, for instance, being gay is criminalized in several countries

My Big Fat Lesbian Wedding: The Do’s and Don’ts

When it comes to planning a same-sex marriage, the details aren’t all that different than a “traditional” marriage.

And while you may run into a few snags here and there when it comes to dealing with opposition to your lesbian wedding, you shouldn’t let that deter you from planning the perfect day for you and your future wife.

Here are a few do’s and don’ts to consider when it comes to your wedding planning…

DO: Know Your Goals and Priorities: Wedding goals are must no matter who is getting married. Know what you want out of your ceremony and be sure to prioritize what you hope to achieve.

DON’T: Feel Like You Have To Plan Your Wedding Like You are Bride & Groom: Find a balance that’s right for you and your girlfriend. You may want to go with traditional or you may want something completely different.

DO: Plan Things Your Way: Don’t be afraid to voice your opinion if there’s something in the planning you or your girlfriend don’t like or aren’t happy with. It’s your day after all…so be firm and make sure it’s done your way.

DON’T: Be Afraid to Put Creative Spins on Tradition: Who says the two of you can’t walk down the aisle together? While it’s okay to stick with tradition as well, how you plan your wedding and what traditions you want should depend solely on you and your bride to be. Don’t be afraid to get a little creative with your wedding.

DO: Help Family & Friends be Confident in Their Wedding Roles: Will one parent walk to down the aisle? Both? Or will you walk each other down the aisle? Will there be joint showers and bachelorette parties or does such tradition even interest you and your girlfriend? Be sure to keep your friends and family clued in on everything too. That way you’ll have less of a chance for misunderstanding and conflict.

DON’T: Let Backwards Thinking Vendors Get You Down: Opposition to same-sex marriage will probably always exist. As a lesbian couple, you both must feel comfortable with your potential vendors. Make sure you are upfront and communicate with them. You don’t want to find out a week before your wedding that your baker doesn’t want to do a same-sex wedding.

When everybody is up front with each other from the start, planning will go smoothly. And don’t worry about those who refuse to take part in a gay wedding. There are plenty of vendors out there that will have no problem making your special day that much more special.

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Celebrate Your Pride With These 5 Pride Celebration Destinations

Whether you’ve already been to your fair share of Pride celebrations or you’re entertaining the thought of attending one for the very first time, there’s no doubt that you’re in for a fabulous time.

And there are definitely many exciting destinations to choose from, each celebrating the LGBT population in their own unique way.

With some celebrations only lasting the weekend and others holding non-stop parties for an entire week or sometimes even longer, there’s plenty of Pride partying to be had.

So if you’re looking to make your next Pride celebration a destination trip, here’s a look at some of the top locations you shouldn’t miss out on…

Pride Toronto (Canada)

It’s one of the largest Pride events in the world, with an estimated attendance reaching 1.2 million. Toronto is known for celebrating diversity, including its LGBT population. Pride festivities include glitzy, colorful costumes and dancers, just to name a few and lasts or 10 days.

Sao Paulo Pride (Brazil)

Not to be outdone by Toronto, the Sao Paulo Pride became the largest Pride celebration according to the Guinness Book of World Records and typically sees upwards of over 2.5 million people attending. With plenty of color, culture, and music, you’re definitely in for a memorable Pride celebration in Sao Paulo.

San Francisco Pride (USA)

As one of the world’s leaders of the Pride movement, this long time gay-friendly city in Northern California knows how to put on a Pride celebration. You’ll find hundreds of exhibitors and at least twenty community-run stages and venues throughout the celebration. The parade also passes through some historic areas known for its LGBT activist activity.

Tel Aviv Pride Week (Israel)

Drag shows, great music, and the Tel Aviv Pride Parade are just a few of the over 50 events you’ll experience at Tel Aviv’s Pride Celebration. It doesn’t get much better than a week long Pride party…except maybe for the famous beach party at Gordon Beach to mark the end of the festivities.

Amsterdam Gay Pride (Netherlands)

Amsterdam is famous for its laid back lifestyle and LGBT-friendly openness, so there’s no doubt the Dutch really know how to throw a Pride party. Expect all kinds of awesome festivities like the Drag Queen Olympics. The celebration is also known for its Canal Parade, where over 75 decorate boats sail along the city’s canal. It’s definitely a spectacle not to be missed!

Chicago, Los Angeles, and New York are a few more great US Pride Celebrations destinations to consider, along with Madrid in Europe. Do you have your go to destination to celebrate your Pride? Let us know in the comments section and share with us why it’s a great place for celebrating all things LGBT!

The Allure of Eloping… Why it May be Perfect for You and Your Girlfriend

Back in the day, eloping carried a negative stigma of sorts with it. To elope meant that you had the intention of running away together…be it because the match wasn’t approved by the parents or maybe even because there was a pregnancy involved.

The elopement has come quite a long way since then. These days it’s seen more as a planned destination wedding between the brides and maybe a handful of witnesses, or perhaps just the brides alone with someone to officiate their nuptials.

If you and your girlfriend aren’t into all the bells and whistles that come with a big wedding and are more into the idea of having a more intimate ceremony between yourselves, then eloping just may be the perfect way to do it.

Here’s a look at all of the reasons why you’d want to elope…

You’ll Save Money

It was recently estimated that the average wedding will cost around $29,000. And the costs will only increase depending on the size of the wedding, how many guests you want to invite, and how extravagant you want the reception to be.

So if you and your girlfriend were already contemplating eloping, definitely factor in the costs versus having a traditional wedding.

If you’re already strapped for cash, going more into debt to say “I do” is probably not going to help matters since money tends to be the biggest reason why couples argue or even break up.

Sharing an Intimate Moment…More Intimately

Let’s face it…getting married should be about the two of you, not about guests, where the most convenient locations would be for guests, or who might get offended by not getting an invite. Repeat after me…a wedding is about you and your future wife…each other. And while you might want your loved ones to share in the happiness of your matrimony (you can always have a reception/celebration when you get back), eloping can allow the true intimacy a wedding should celebrate.

No Family Drama

Okay, if they are the sensitive types then you might hear a bit of bitching and complaining about not having a traditional wedding and eloping. But that kind of family drama can be handled pretty easily by just going for it.

Whereas if you stick around and have a wedding ceremony, there may be some uninvited drama headed your way like oppositions to a same-sex marriage, vocal opinions on how the wedding should be planned, or family members making sure you invited so and so, making your guest list way too big.

If you and your girl aren’t about the drama…eloping may be the best decision to make.

Less Stress and More Focus on Each Other

Planning a wedding can take months and often comes with a whole lot of stress. From the cake to the food to the seating arrangements, focus tends to be only on the planning and not on each other. If you want to avoid that stress, you may want to consider eloping. It doesn’t require an elaborate plan…just a destination and the two of you.

You’ll Have a Blast!

Not only will you be getting married to each other, you’ll be doing it on your terms and in a location that means something to you. And it will definitely be a fun and memorable way to celebrate your love.

Eloping isn’t going to be for everyone, but it’s definitely an option to consider if you’re both avid travelers and are looking to have a more intimate celebration of your love.

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