Tag Archives: Questions

33 Unwanted Questions Lesbians Get Asked, Like All The F*cking Time

I’m a woman, who happens to date other women.

When I walk down the street, people stare when I hold another woman’s hand. They question how we know each other.

They say things to us that they would never consider saying to a straight couple.

We are singled out because we are different. It’s weird though, because we don’t feel different.

I don’t think of my self as being a lesbian couple. I see us as a couple.

People have their own idea of what a lesbian relationship looks like, and if someone doesn’t fit that bill, then it’s really hard for people to understand.

And not understanding, apparently, opens the door for a line of questioning.


1. How do you… you know… do it?

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2. Are you sure you’re a lesbian?

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3. Which one of you is “the boy”?

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4. What is scissoring?

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5. Is it weird to have friends who are girls? Are you ever attracted to your friends who are girls? How do they feel about it?

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6. But… you’re so pretty! You wear dresses. I don’t get it?!

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7. How do you know you’re actually a lesbian? Like, are you sure?

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8. But… you… but you… dated guys?

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9. Do you fear what God will think?

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10. My [insert friend, distant family member, or neighbour] is a lesbian, do you know her?

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11. Is it because you hate men?

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12. It must be so cool to have two closets and more makeup and shit?

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13. Being with another women must be so much easier?

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14. You’re attractive for a lesbian, aren’t you?

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15. Don’t you miss real sex?

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16. Do you hate straight people then?

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17. I’ve always wanted to be a lesbian but I just don’t think I can give up sex with men, you know?

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18. Did you choose to be a lesbian?

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19. If you like girls who look like men…why don’t you date men?

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20. Do you guys just use toys?

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21. So can I watch???

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22. Is that you sister? Cos you really look like sisters

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23. I bet you really like Ellen?

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24. Are you sure this lesbian thing isn’t just a phase?

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25. Is your life really like the L Word?

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26. Have you always been a lesbian?

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27. I’ve never been to a gay wedding, can I come to yours?

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28. Why do all lesbian dress like boys?


29. Oh so that’s why we didn’t work out?

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30. I always wanted to be a lesbian, but…

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31. Are you sure you don’t want to be with a man again?

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32. Will you use a sperm donor or use someone you know to get pregnant?

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33. You’re a lesbian? What a waste

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How Privileged Are You?

You can’t spend more than a few minutes in a feminist space without hearing people talk about privilege. And if you’re new to feminism, the concept can be overwhelming. What exactly does “privilege” mean? What does it look like in today’s society?

Privilege is complex, but as queer women our privileges are often limited – no matter how hard we push forward.

Watch this powerful video from Buzzfeed, then go through the questions your self.


List of questions


1. If your parents worked nights and weekends to support your family, take one step back.


2. If you are able to move through the world without fear of sexual assault, take one step forward.


3. If you can show affection for your romantic partner in public without fear of ridicule or violence, take one step forward.


4. If you have ever been diagnosed as having a physical or mental illness/disability, take one step back.


5. If the primary language spoken in your household growing up was not english, take one step back.


6. If you came from a supportive family environment take one step forward.


7. If you have ever tried to change your speech or mannerisms to gain credibility, take one step back.


8. If you can go anywhere in the country, and easily find the kinds of hair products you need and/or cosmetics that match your skin color, take one step forward.


9. If you were embarrassed about your clothes or house while growing up, take one step back.


10. If you can make mistakes and not have people attribute your behavior to flaws in your racial/gender group, take one step forward.


11. If you can legally marry the person you love, regardless of where you live, take one step forward.


12. If you were born in the United States, take one step forward.


13. If you or your parents have ever gone through a divorce, take one step back.


14. If you felt like you had adequate access to healthy food growing up, take one step forward


15. If you are reasonably sure you would be hired for a job based on your ability and qualifications, take one step forward.


16. If you would never think twice about calling the police when trouble occurs, take one step forward.


17. If you can see a doctor whenever you feel the need, take one step forward.


18. If you feel comfortable being emotionally expressive/open, take one step forward.


19. If you have ever been the only person of your race/gender/socio-economic status/ sexual orientation in a classroom or workplace setting, please take one step back.


20. If you took out loans for your education take one step backward.


21. If you get time off for your religious holidays, take one step forward.


22. If you had a job during your high school and college years, take one step back.


23. If you feel comfortable walking home alone at night, take one step forward.


24. If you have ever traveled outside the United States, take one step forward.


25. If you have ever felt like there was NOT adequate or accurate representation of your racial group, sexual orientation group, gender group, and/or disability group in the media, take one step back.


26. If you feel confident that your parents would be able to financially help/support you if you were going through a financial hardship, take one step forward.


27. If you have ever been bullied or made fun of based on something that you can’t change, take one step back.


28. If there were more than 50 books in your house growing up, take one step forward.


29. If you studied the culture or the history of your ancestors in elementary school take one step forward.


30. If your parents or guardians attended college, take one step forward.


31. If you ever went on a family vacation, take one step forward.


32. If you can buy new clothes or go out to dinner when you want to, take one step forward.


33. If you were ever offered a job because of your association with a friend or family member, take one step forward.


34. If one of your parents was ever laid off or unemployed not by choice, take one step back.


35. If you were ever uncomfortable about a joke or a statement you overheard related to your race, ethnicity, gender, appearance, or sexual orientation but felt unsafe to confront the situation, take one step back.

Pillow Talk | How Do You Know If You’re A Lesbian?

Its a good question – how do you know if you’re lesbian? Well, truth is only you can truly determine if you are queer, and you need to do this on your own terms. There’s no test for it, so the most reliable method is to look at your history, your feelings, and make an educated guess.

More: Coming Out of a Marriage by Megan Luscombe

And if you’re still questioning then watch this wonderful video from the Pillow Talk ladies.

And once you accept you’re gay, then its time to learn theme tune. Ally Hills has kindly written a song for coming out. Listen and learn

Cameron Esposito Answers 11 Questions Straight People Want To Ask A Lesbian

In the clip below, Cameron Esposito answers questions sent in from readers and no query is too personal — or too stupid — for her to offer a candid, considered response.

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The comedian, who recently released her album “Same Sex Symbol,” does some truth telling and we like it.

[tweet_dis]“What makes this lesbian feel pretty? False eyelashes and a vest.”[/tweet_dis]

You can pick up her album and follow her on Twitter. For upcoming tour dates, head here.