I don’t know about you, but I’m a little bit of a book nerd. There’s something about the feel of the pages that makes me calm, and knowing that I can check in on my favorite characters from time to time is a great reassurance. (Hey, sometimes the power goes out – all I need is a battery-powered flashlight and a Stephen King novel!)
Okay, so I’m a bit of a nerd when it comes to my girlfriends, too… I put a lot of dedication into the things they do, and I do my best to do them right. But books don’t have expectations. If I put a book down for six months, I can pick up right where I left off, no questions asked. You can’t do that with a girlfriend, usually. Most of the ones I’ve had required a little more maintenance than that.
Want to know 8 more reasons a good book is better than a girlfriend?
The book will never eat all your favorite food.
Now, I love my girlfriend dearly – but if I had a dollar for every time she ate the last cookie, I’d be able to buy twice as many cookies to start with. A good book will never do that – all your food is safe. (You probably shouldn’t give it anything to drink, either – books don’t like that.)
The book will always stimulate your mind.
A book is better than a girlfriend because the book is going to inspire you. Of course, a good girlfriend will, too, but there’s no guarantee. Even if a book is bad, it’s going to inspire you to think of why it should be better. It could even motivate you to write your own book (an endeavor I personally encourage). A good book can make you think about new worlds, new galaxies, and new possibilities that may not have been on your mind before. A good book is going to teach you something – even if it’s just something about yourself.
The book will never cheat on you.
This is another one that falls into a grey area, because most girlfriends probably won’t cheat on you either. But if you leave a book on your table, most likely, you’re going to come back and find it hasn’t moved. (Unless you have roommates, or cats.) This means you know it’s not straying – but even if it does, that doesn’t mean that your relationship with it is doomed – as long as the person asked first!
The book will always be there when you need it.
Of course, this depends on whether the above mentioned variables are in play (the roommates and cats). But when you want to read a book, you can have one. If you don’t mind losing out on the touchy-feely aspect of book ownership, there are even e-book readers that will let you carry thousands of books in your pocket. (I have a Kindle myself, and it’s one of my favorite splurges. I take it everywhere with me.)
The book will never mind if you bring another book home.
In fact, I think they talk on the shelves and eventually start to like each other. I went on a trip to see my sister not too long ago, and came home with three new books – and then my brother-in-law gave me a fourth for Christmas. My books don’t seem to mind, although I’m close to needing another shelf. Girlfriends, on the other hand, tend to get a little touchy about things like this… Proceed with caution!
The book will always leave you satisfied.
A good book will satisfy your love of reading, which can be as intimate as any other love, to the right person. Sure, there are going to be people who think that it’s weird when you change your relationship status over a book character – but that’s not to say you’d be the only one to do it. A well-written book from your favorite author will very rarely (if ever) leave you disappointed – and most of the time, even a book from a new author is a welcome addition.
The book will never get mad when you’re too busy for it.
I’ve got some books that I entirely forgot about for over fifteen years. (Somehow, they ended up in my mother’s storage unit!) They’re sitting on the shelf, right next to the books I just got. I don’t think any of them mind – especially since I read through my old favorites on a fairly regular basis. (Guys, try to give all your books the attention they deserve – everyone needs to be held once in a while!)
The book might even help you meet your soul mate.
I’ve fantasized about the idea of meeting my true love in a book store. (One that sells coffee and scones too, please.) Even though it’s not the cultural norm, think of how awesome it would be if you found a new favorite – and some gorgeous piece of book-loving beauty steps in and offers to buy it for you if you give her your number. I’m not going to lie, that line would totally work on me, too. If you’re a book lover looking for love, why not try implementing this into your own flirt technique? You never know – it could be magical!