Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where bad guys are easier to find than queer women with substantial storylines!

This week on the show, Scarecrow gets his name and one mad man eats adrenal glands for breakfast.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

As you’ll remember from last week, a deranged fellow named Gerald Crane joined a phobia support group and was going around scaring members shitless and harvesting their adrenal glands. There was a stand off between him and detectives Harvey and Jim but he soon evaded capture by…locking a door. Genius, I know.

Continuing on his adrenal gland jacking spree, after he invades the home of a teacher and takes his one too, we finally get to find out what he’s been doing with them. The killer has been…injecting them? Well, specifically he’s been turning them into his own fear inducing tonic. Three parts adrenal gland, two parts some sort of yellow substance that looks like wee and one part dramatic shots of him mixing it all together and voila, he has something that will see him confront his worst fear He injects it and runs into the corridor where he’s greeted by a woman (his ex-wife) engulfed in flames.

The killer, as it turns out, happens to be a biology teacher at a local school. According to the headmistress, he has a theory that fear is the reason for all of the world’s problems and that with his super smarts, and some super murderous antics, he can cure it! And not just his own fear either; he can cure his son Jonathan too but as we skip to a scene where his son is being injected, we find that mini-Crane isn’t so thrilled about it.

Researching the older Crane’s motivation for the crimes days late (surely that would be one of the first things you’d look into?) Gotham’s dud detectives fire up the precinct’s creaky computers to discover that Crane’s wife died in a house fire, not in a car crash like he told everyone (including his employer). They head out to the old house but before they arrive there’s already trouble brewing as Jonathan tries to flee from his dad who is convinced on injecting him with the pee-coloured stuff.

When the useless twosome show up, the Cranes take their serum and hightail it into the field in the dead of night. Their brilliant plan? To lay in full view on some bales of hay where they’ll shoot up hopefully before Jim and Harvey see them. By some standards, it works. Jonathan gets a massive quadruple dose of the serum while his dad gets shot to Swiss cheese, not frightened by the bullets (though he really probably should be). He lays flailing in pain amongst the hay bales, facing up at a scarecrow as it courses through his body. Later, a doctor informs Jim that Jonathan is in a constant state of fear and that the thing that he fears most (that scarecrow!) will continue to haunt his waking hours for the rest of his life. Yeah, definitely expect this guy to turn up as a villain in the future.

Elsewhere in the city, Falcone and Maroni are shaking hands on a deal that will see Maroni leave Penguin (the double crossing informant) alone. Sadly, instead of killing the most annoying character on the show, Maroni will take solace in having a judge on his side. Much to Penguin’s delight of course as his club (freshly taken from former owner Fish Mooney) has received a makeover and a new name and will become an integral part of Falcone’s operations.

Meanwhile, Fish herself is in the middle of another power struggle (she just can’t seem to lay low, can she?) as after being kidnapped last week she’s thrown into a dungeon with a bunch of other nasty types. The head guy (who’s the head guy because he’s the only one with a blade, naturally) has a bit of a soft spot for Fish though and when she seduces him and sits on his lap…slice!…he gets his throat coat courtesy of the baddest bitch in there. We also see people fighting for scraps of food and some woman wailing about having her eyes gouged out so hopefully that one will be explained next week.

And finally, in the dumbest decision anyone made on the show this week (and that’s really saying something), butler and guardian Alfred sends young charge Bruce off into the woods to take part on the annual trek that he would do with his (now deceased) father. Bruce throws a tantrum, knocks over some rocks and then falls down a hill. It’s a good bit of comedy, actually.

He busts his ankle in the process and after sitting in a ditch for hours he finally tries to climb out of it where we see Alfred warming his hands on a bonfire, where he’d apparently been sitting for a while. Yes, not only did he send the billionaire heir out by himself after his parents were killed just a few months ago (and their killer still has not been located) he also let him struggle as tried to rescue him. That’s some sort of twisted character building, let me tell ya…

The Gay

For several weeks on the trot now (I think the official count is four, but it’s all been a queer-less blur) lesbian badass Detective Renee Montoya hasn’t been featured and her love interest Barbara was only featured once for about 20 two episodes ago.

This week was no different and by my estimation, the current odds of one (or both!) of them being killed off by the end of the season are now at about 10/1. It’s not clear as to whether or not the show is playing the long game with these two but for the past few episodes, they’ve clearly been dead weights.

The Ugly

Jim and new love interest Leslie have some unnecessary plot about workplace romances. Blergh, boring, I’m falling asleep etc. It was a total filler plot this week and I didn’t see the point.

Props to the writers though, because in terms of ‘ugliness’, this episode did alright.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham, also known as the show where the police are about as useful as a chocolate teapot. In a sauna.

This week on the show Penguin finally gets what’s coming to him and I’m ready to send out a search and rescue team for missing queer ladies, Barbara and Renee.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

What’s your biggest fear? For Jim Gordon it’s probably ‘viewers seeing through my good veneer and realising that I’m as useless as all the other chumps in this place’ but for countless other Gotham residents.

Their fears prevent them from going about their day to day, which is why they have a phobia support group. Some support group that turns out to be though when it turns out that someone is killing off its members, terrorising them with their worst fears.

First to go six feet under is a man named Adam who’s been hoisted up on a ledge and then dropped off of it just to submit him to his worst fear (heights) before he died. To find his killer, Bullock hatches an ingenious plan: flirt inappropriately with Adam’s sponsor Scottie and then accompany her to a meeting. Totally professional. They’ll have plenty to talk about during their not-a-date too as the second victim – a man who’s terrified of pigs – gets accosted with one of the oinkers on the street and ends up being led towards a thug, clunked on the head and kidnapped for more fear inducing treatment.

He survives though, when Jim and Harvey investigate a lead and head to an old chair manufacturers which is the same place the man is being held captive, surrounded by, you guessed it; more pigs. They shoot his captor dead but now must find the captor’s partner – flash forward a few hours to the support group meeting where Harvey is *meant* to be scoping out suspects.

This being Harvey and this being Gotham, a place that seems to breed bad detectives like rabbits, Harvey sits twiddling his thumbs when Scottie gets up to follow a man who runs out of the room after revealing that he has a fear of failure. Harvey literally asks the rest of the group if it seems like they’ve been gone a long time and although he was there to look for murderers specifically, he didn’t think to go and check on her or go to the meeting with backup so that he could prevent this from happening. Incredible. Alas, Scottie looks to be victim number three as we see her being bundled into the back of a van.

Scottie must be something special though, because her kidnapping presents us with the first bit of good detective work in weeks. Harvey rings her mum to find out that the killer has probably taken her to a local pool, a place Scottie nearly drowned when she was a little’un and the place her fear first reared its ugly head. He and Jim show up just in the nick of time (gotta love those TV coincidences!) and rescue her, but Jim’s efforts to chase down the suspect prove futile and he gets away. With some help of Jim’s new girlfriend Dr. Thompkins, we discover that the killer also stole the adrenal gland from his first victim. For what? God knows! But we’ll probably get an answer next week as the show attempts to lure us in with another two-part crime special.

Speaking of crimes, the season-arching case of just who killed Bruce Wayne’s parents hits a snag (or does the best thing possible) when Bruce relieves Jim of his investigatory duties as his search has only turned up one eyewitness and she turned out to be a liar.

Meanwhile, Penguin’s old boss and current fugitive gangster Fish Mooney rings up his new boss Maroni to let him in on a little secret, i.e that Penguin is a lying two-faced rat who has been gathering info for Maroni’s rival, Falcone. While Mooney is travelling, revelling in her latest smart deed, Maroni is hauling Penguin’s suited ass off to a remote cabin. They’ll eat oatmeal! And bond! And see a man about a thing!

Only there is no man and after growing suspicious about Maroni’s intentions, Penguin nabs the gun from his bag and pulls it on his boss after a game of truth or dare reveals that Maroni does indeed know about his double crossing. The gun is full of blanks though and after firing them all off, Maroni punches him out and takes him to an old junkyard, where he’ll be squished into Penguin-y paste. Well, that’s the plan anyway but Penguin rings up the junkyard’s owner and tells him that Falcone will come after him and so the owner sets him free and voila, the Penguin is once again out in the wild.

The Gay

Once again, there were no queer characters on the show. For those who are keeping track, that’s two episodes on the trot. Renee hasn’t been seen in three weeks and Barbara only showed up a fortnight ago for a pointless, 30 second scene.

I wouldn’t be surprised if one (or both) of them gets added to the ‘dead queer character’ list by the end of the season.

The Ugly

What were the ugly parts of Gotham this week? Well there was the shoddy policing and the unnecessary inclusion of Jim’s love interest. There was also the continued insistence by the show that Edward Nygma is a creepy genius and isn’t actually, just creepy as he put a bunch of severed arms in the medical examiner’s locker in order to get him fired.

I’m starting to think that Gotham is just destined to be rough around the edges. Expect another Gotham recap next week.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where the good guys ain’t so good and the bad guys are bad to the bone.

This week in the show, Fish Mooney just about swims her way out of troubled water and Gotham continues to be a show full of missing queer ladies.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down on the show this week.

The Plot

What’s going down is a whole lot of corruption! Some poor blighter (or no good criminal, possibly both depending on how you see these things) has been murdered and stuck on a hook for the whole factory to see. Narcotics detective Flass shows up in his shiny Italian suit and as he’s being led away by partner Bullock, leading man Jim does a bit of detective work and finds a bunch of weird blue square baggies in the victim’s shoe. Their jobs are made easier by a janitor who saw the whole thing go down, including the killer, so they haul him into the station. They pull him into the station and while he, the lead witness in a murder case, is left completely alone, someone comes in and murders him.

Jim rightly thinks that a cop is the culprit and so questions them all to get a name – Delaware. Officer Delaware flees to his car where Jim arrests him and pops open the trunk – more blue squares? Odd. When Jim brings the squares to Chief Essen, she and Flass explain that they are part of a narcotics investigation that’s being going on for some time. It all seems a bit suss so when Harvey tells him that Flass is as corrupt as a cheese sandwich in the summer and is involved in the drugs trade himself, they have to go to one of his warehouses to do some extra digging.

Delaware and the rest of Flass’ cronies are at the warehouse when they get there, citing search warrants and other loopholes. Essen also says that they can’t do anything since it would cost them all their jobs and so Jim is forced to turn to old pal Penguin for help. Penguin’s help comes up good as his henchman gets Delaware to confess that Flass killed the goon to send a message (the janitor was just collateral) and even provides the murder weapon to put Flass in the slammer.

When Jim presents the murder weapon there’s resistance and a whole lot of yelling from Flass about knowing guys in high places and all that other baloney. It’s fruitless though as the rest of the force (including Essen) back Jim up. It’s a tiny dent in the larger, also corrupt scheme of things but Jim’s corruption clean up train is definitely gaining some speed.

Going less great is the situation between Bruce ‘Future Batman’ Wayne and Selina ‘Future Catwoman’ Kyle. Ignoring the fact that Bruce has a bit of a thing for Selina, the two were genuinely friends which is why it hurt Bruce so bad when he and butler Alfred had to go into hiding for their own safety. Now that they’ve come back though, Bruce is determined to find Selina and so he roams the streets looking for his lost (budding) love.

When she finally turns up – having received a message from homeless pal Ivy that Bruce was on the lookout – things quickly go pear-shaped. He hands over a souvenir snow globe and offers her a place to stay, saying that his fancy digs are “better” than her current ones and she’s offended, tells him to chill and then explains that she lied and never saw who killed his parents (the reason they became friends in the first place). It stings and later when Alfred has to pick up the pieces of both his heart and of the snow globe.

Meanwhile, things aren’t looking too hot for Fish Mooney either. After her plan to topple mob boss Falcone went south last week, her and henchman Butch are now in the grasps of some nefarious fellas. Butch escapes and finds out where Mooney is and he gets there just in the nick of time – but it’s not before she’s been suffocated within an inch of her life and is about to be dismembered.

After saving the day, the two of them head to Mooney’s old club to get it back from Penguin, Mooney’s former assistant and up and comer in the criminal underworld. She has him licking her shoe at one point but then twisted hitman Zsasz and his cronies show up and save the day. Mooney and Butch hightail it out of there and we later see her being sent off to safety after a kiss from Harvey.

The Gay

Once again, there was no queer content in this week’s episode of Gotham. Last week, Renee was suspiciously absent and love interest Barbara was only present for a second when she showed up at her parent’s house so anything would have been a step up.

It’s probably too soon to say that this is unfair treatment of the characters or even to suggest that they’re only featured to fulfil queer tropes but it’s certainly making me wonder.

The Ugly

Getting more of the limelight than Renee or Barbara is the relationship between Edward Nygma and Kristen Kringle. Last week I pointed out how awful their dynamic is as Edward has been harassing Kristen since the show began last year. The show appears to be passing all of his oddness as ‘romantic’ as we’ve now levelled up from ‘live bullet in a cupcake’ (last week’s gift) to ‘actually quite sweet note’.

I had an issue with this plot anyway but to see it passed off as normal and to see Kristen be anything but appalled at Edward’s behaviour is really sad to see.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where moral codes, ethics and good policing come to die.

This week on the show, last week’s electro-bad guy makes a return, Barbara shows up for no reason and everyone is terrible at their job!

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down in this episode of Gotham.

The Plot

Last week, Jim showed up at Arkham Asylum ready for guard duty, miserable about his demotion but determined to keep the patients safe. He did a remarkably bad job as not only half a dozen people get murdered or have their brains electro-shocked into bewilderment, the perpetrators also got away, fleeing under the cover of darkness. Well it seems as though the escape was engineered so that Dr. Gruber (the electro-shocking mad man) could clear up some unfinished business from a job gone wrong back in the day.

First on his to do list? Pick up a multi-ton generator from a hardware store. The double crossing fool in charge of the place has been keeping it safe for Gruber for years but he doesn’t get much thanks as the doctor soon fries his marbles and leaves the man felt tip penning gibberish on the walls. Apparently the massive power hub is light enough to me driven around in a van because that’s exactly how they transport it out of there and up the road to mob boss Maroni’s place.

Jim, who made a deal with the Police Commissioner to find Gruber in a day or risk being stuck on guard duty forever, is already wise to it. Having just received a visit from Dr. Leslie Thompkins (who also featured in last week’s episode) Jim finds out that some voodoo priestess at the prison made a doll of Maroni for Gruber prior to his escape. Not that this knowledge encourages Jim to I don’t know, ring Maroni and warn him of the dangers? By the time Jim shows up in his rubber galoshes (that he’s donned specially for the electro-villain occasion) an electric grenade has already gone off and zapped Maroni and co.’s noggins.

After they’ve been patched up, Jim strikes up a conversation with Maroni (and Penguin who sits up from his stretcher to dither on about a meeting with other mob boss Falcone) about Gruber, confirming the two’s dodgy dealings. Taking them down to the station for police protection is the best plan of action says Jim, they’ll be like bait! Taking all of the effort out of policing, everyone will hang around like sitting ducks, waiting for Gruber and his henchmen to make an assault on the building.

Well, who should show up not long after? It’s Gruber! Having attached some leads from his portable generator to the metal of the precinct, the deranged doctor has managed to zap everything and everyone within the Gotham PD building. Except for The People’s Hero™, Jim Gordon, who was immune thanks to those rubber galoshes (that no one else though to wear despite the fact that they were literally waiting for an electro-shocking mad man to attack them). He has a fight with Gruber’s henchman, eventually knocking him out cold, before Gruber starts charging up his suit to electrocute Gordon too.

Jim uses a cup of water to short circuit Gruber’s suit and voila, Gotham’s most useless detective actually saves the day, winning his job back in the process.

About that spot of bother that Falcone needed help with – Mooney has ‘kidnapped’ Falcone’s girlfriend Liza and is threatening to beat her up unless Falcone leaves Gotham with Liza and hands over all of his power to Mooney instead. Could it really be that easy? Could Mooney really get all of the power she wanted, just like that? Of course not; we’re still a dozen episodes away from the season finale.

Falcone is one step ahead of Mooney. He shows up to the meeting place after a conversation with Penguin, Penguin having revealed that Mooney planted Liza months ago! So Falcone asks all of the right questions in an effort to find out if Liza really was in cahoots with Mooney all this time. Liza’s lies are about as obvious as an elephant hiding in a bathtub and Falcone strangles the life out of her with his own bare hands. Grim.

Victor Zsasz was on protection duty for Falcone too so every single one of Mooney’s guards is dead (bar right hand man, Butch) and she’s helpless. Consider Mooney’s days numbered (or, we’ll see how she tries to wriggles herself out of this one in next week’s episode).

The Gay

No gay this week as our resident lesbian badass Detective Renee Montoya was nowhere to be seen. Apparently she only gets wheeled out when Gotham’s producers need to kill some time!

The Ugly

Speaking of killing time, Renee’s love interest and Jim Gordon’s ex, Barbara, got just one scene this week. She showed up at her parents and asked to stay with them for a few days. She also drank some tea. Sound pointless? It was. This week’s episode was 44 minutes long meaning that it wouldn’t have hurt them to cut this scene and yet she was featured for no reason whatsoever.

It’s ok to have pointless characters but don’t make their dead weight-edness so blatant next time, Gotham producers.

And, also in the dead weight category was an unnecessary romance scene between Jim and Doctor Thompkins. The two had ‘chemistry’ (and I use that word in the lightest of terms) last week and so with her having helped with solve the crime (and I use that phrase lightly too) those feelings bubbled up and the two started kissing.

Why did Jim have to get a new love interest mere episodes after having fallen out with Barbara? Why couldn’t Doctor Thompkins just be a super smart aid to the Gotham officer without none of this heterosexual rubbish? Both are good questions that I sadly don’t have the answers to.

Oh and speaking of awful, heterosexual plotlines, Edward, the police force’s resident boffin, decided to put a live bullet in a cupcake to win a coworker’s affections. It was weird, creepy and as it’s not the first peculiar antic he’s pulled, it’s bordering on harassment. There’s a chance that the show might address his Definitely Not Cool behaviour in a future episode but as this is Gotham, I have my doubts.

We’ll have another Gotham recap for you next week.

Welcome to the first Gotham recap of the new year! Gotham, also known as the show where the moral code is as existent as Pegasus, the Loch Ness Monster and the jolly green giant.

This week on the show, lead character Jim Gordon starts work at Arkham Asylum but as expect, things do not go to plan.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly.

The Plot

When we open on Gotham, old Jimboy is overseeing a musical. It’s all costumes and cheers until the dramatic angel sings, causing another inmate to punch the high notes out of his performance. The world’s worst guard (he even calls the inmates lunatics), Jim gets a new love interest for his troubles; a woman named Dr. Tomkins who he meets as the victim is being treated. There’s some casual flirting and the pummelled angel wakes up and tells them to get a room *yawn*.

It’s not all peachy for the main man though after his usual patrol turns up a dead man. Well, a brain dead man at least as Tomkins determines that the inmate has been administered electro shock therapy, frying his brain and rendering him alive but unable to do anything. Jim wants to call in the GCPD, Dr. Gerry Lang says no and so we’ve now got Jim’s first case of the new year.

The first step of his investigation is finding out just who had the keys which bizarrely, instead of searching the cells Jim decides to…interrogate the mentally insane criminals. Who obviously are in the right of mind for that sort of thing. Alas, even after conversations with child-like axe murderer Helzinger and sociopathic Dr. Gruber, Jim is still stuck for answers. But Jim will need to work fast as our singing angel friend is the latest victim, being reduced to a gibbering, play-reciting mess.
Jim has now got back up though, having called up old pal Harvey Bullock to help him! And he’s a genuine help rather than a lumbering pro-corruption weight for once too, finding out from Lang that Nurse Dorothy is an inmate not a Nurse and has had them all fooled until this very moment. (Nice going, background checks). Jim figures it out about the right time and sets about putting the whole place in lockdown but not before Dorothy has sprinted off and let all of the inmates out of their cells like a maniacal pied piper. She also gets trampled; in the most ridiculous scene in television history but let’s pretend that this is super serious!

So with Dorothy dead, is the mystery over? Of course not and Jim and Dr. Tomkins still need to get the hell out of dodge. It involves some quick thinking and Jim punching an inmate right in the kisser to protect her. Aww, chivalry’s not dead!

Getting out alive (just about), Jim is all ready to celebrate with Harvey and Police Chief Essen when the coroner reveals that Dorothy had electro-shock wounds on her neck too. Wounds, he says, that she couldn’t possibly have given to herself. That means that she was merely another victim and that the real culprit is still on the loose. Not that they get there in time to stop them though as both a guard and Dr. Lang die, with a snapped neck and a total bloodbath respectively. Cut to a shot of Gruber and Helzinger hightailing it out of Arkham in a van.

Less fortunate meanwhile is Ivy, who’s shivering her juvenile tuchus off under a cardboard box. Thank goodness for thieving pal Selina ‘Catwoman’ Kyle who rescues her from the destitution and ‘borrows’ Jim and fiancée Barbara’s pad for a bit. Anything for a friend in need and all that.

We also catch up with Oswald “The Penguin” Cobblepot for a bit and the limping, suited goon is doing mob boss Maroni’s bidding, talking to fishermen to raise the prices and hand over more of their fish gotten gains to the mafia. Things don’t quite go to plan and he gets a right welt to the face from the police and a lock up in a cell for his efforts. And, when Maroni shows up to let him out, Penguin gets an earful from Maroni too. Better watch your back, boy.

Other mob boss Fish Mooney is planning her own moves. She’s talking big. She wants to take down mob leader Carmine Falcone and split the business up between herself and the two other honchos. There will have to be a new leader and, having come up with all the ideas Mooney puts herself forward, but Jimmy, the senior figure under Falcone, is having none of it and so he will have to be dealt with.

Her plan of action is to send Butch, her right hand man an old friend of Jimmy’s, to go and speak to him. Mooney has concerns that Butch is a turncoat though but he assures her that there’s nothing to be worried about. Does she have a point though? When Butch meets with Jimmy a day later, he offers his friend a hefty sum; a massive chunk of the business. Butch tells him he’ll ‘consider it’ and will get back to him soon. Hmm.

When they meet up again, Butch and Jimmy have a right old heart to heart. When they stole a bunch of meat when they were 14, Butch says that he took a bunch of prime steaks for himself and he’s felt bad for stiffing his friend out of those premium cuts ever since. He’s sorry, Jimmy forgives him, it’s a beautiful showcase of friendship! Until Butch pulls out a gun and puts a bullet in Jimmy’s head. Looks like Mooney has nothing to worry about after all.

The Gay

As for our other favourite Gotham-ians (Gothamites? residents of Gotham, anyway) Renee and Barbara, the two are holed up in Renee’s room. Bringing in some empty prop coffee cups, Renee looks to wake Barbara up the right way! Give her some energy! Or give her something that will shake her out of a pill induced slumber as Barbara is buddied up with her intoxicated demons once more.

Despite kisses and coffee, it’s not all niceties. Renee wants Barbara to call Jim and help her get clean – she and Barbara are toxics together, she says. Renee has been sober for a year, after her initial relationship with Barbara got her into this mess in the first place, so I don’t blame her for saying that. However, it seems disjointed on the show’s part to see make relationship blow up so fast.

She does actually phone Jim though but Ivy, having taken up a spot on their sofa, answers the phone pretending to be romantically involved with Jim (?). It’s weird and Ivy even sounds like a child but Barbara falls for it and tells her to go to hell so it might not be completely done for Barbara and Renee just yet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5opRJAsw2hg

The Ugly

Ignoring the oddly shoehorned in romance hints between Jim and Dr. Tomkins, the awkward kiss between Renee and Barbara or the fact that Penguin’s storyline existed once again for no apparent reason, the ugly in this week’s Gotham was actually what was missing.

Specifically, Bruce Wayne and his butler Alfred Pennyworth were missing and the episode wasn’t really lacking because of it. It’ll be interesting to see how their corruption busting plot coexists with Jim’s and if the plot surrounding the young Batman will put me to sleep.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where the heroes don’t wear capes and the villains don’t wear masks since everyone is awful in some sort of way, shape or form anyway!

This week in Gotham, Good Guy Jim Gordon gets what was coming to him and the city’s resident teenage hoodlums go on the run.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

The episode opens, a woman appears confused and lost at Wayne Manor. “Not sure you should be here,” says the groundskeeper. It takes about three seconds before he’s dead with his blood on his murderer’s forehead as a post-battle celebration. Rest in pieces Mr. Groundskeep, we hardly knew ya.

Energised from the kill, our Lady of Death and her crew head inside the Manor, where Bruce, Selina Kyle and butler Alfred Pennyworth reside. Unfortunately for Alfred’s good soul he’s given her exactly what she wanted by inviting her in, falling for her line about having been injured in a car accident. Alfred gets the lumps knocked out of him for his trouble (and a gunshot to the shoulder) while Selina and Bruce hotfoot it through the Wayne Manor grounds, looking to hide in the city until it’s safe to return.

Not that it will be safe any time soon though as Selina, a witness to the murder of Bruce’s parents, is a wanted woman. Whoever was behind their deaths wants her head on a plate, a stick or just dumped in the gutter. Selina (and Bruce, as he’s now on the run too) will have to hope that the Gotham City Police Department gets the assassin squad before they get to them.

Similarly fearing for his life is Penguin. Reeling from last week’s vault explosion in which he lost millions, mob boss Falcone wants to know why Penguin (his informant) didn’t tell him that mob boss Maroni was up to something. It was mob boss Fish Mooney who was behind it, protests Penguin, but Falcone wants proof it was an inside job.

So it’ll be a bad day for Fish then as while Jim interrogates Harvey Dent asking who could have known that Selina was the witness (he says he leaked Jim’s name for leverage and Dick Lovecraft may have been behind it), Harvey Bullock interrogates Selina’s homeless friend who says that Fish might have a lead about a fence who knows where Selina is. And, this is all kicking off as Falcone is digging into Fish and his other lackeys about paying more money to him in order to recoup his lost funds.

Not that any of it is phasing her (yet) at least. She speaks to henchman Butch, explaining that even if Falcone is onto her about the vault explosion, he can’t be certain of it yet. As a result, she thinks that they should get some more people on board so that they can take Falcone out once and for all. I think that this is a stupid plan and that they’ll all be dead by the end of the season but what do I know? At least she’ll be able to call in a favour from the GCPD as she decides to tear up the city – she’s just told Alfred and Harvey where to find the fence.

Chasing up a lead of his own, Jim shows up at one of Dick Lovecraft’s apartments wanting to know if the blasted blighter was behind the Selina/Bruce hit. Surprisingly, Dick cacks himself faced with the barrel of Jim’s gun and tells him that the hit squad is after him too, for knowing too much. It’s no made up story either as Dick’s literary surname would suggest, as the assassins soon show up, knock Jim out cold, Dick running scared. What happens when Jim wakes up? He finds Dick dead in his bathtub, Jim’s gun apparently being the murder weapon. Good luck scrubbing your prints off that one, Jimbo.

Things are going similarly pear-shaped for Bruce and Selina who have gone under the radar to meet this fence. Selina’s got thousands of dollars worth of merch that she pilfered from the Wayne’s but the fence is a stingy so and so and won’t give her much for it. Much more valuable he says, are Selina and Bruce and so he soon locks them in a room, waiting until the assassins get there.

The thing about locking two super smart teens in a room together is that they’ll escape, or at least try to. They make too much noise and Shady Fence sends a guard to see what’s up. There’s a chase, some hiding and a big bit of ass-whooping but Bruce manages to keep it together under interrogation, deflecting questions long enough for Selina to get out of dodge. In the nick of time Alfred and Harvey show up and save him from any more questioning, but the female assassin gets away.

When Bruce and Alfred get home, Bruce gets a nice surprise at least. It’s Selina! She sneaks up, returns those stolen goods from earlier and the two of them kiss before she hightails it out of there. It’s not safe for them to be together, after all. But aw, it’s love’s young dream!

As that whole ‘rich millionaire Dick Lovecraft got killed and Jim could take the fall for it’? The Mayor of Gotham is telling everybody that it was a suicide, with Dick being driven to it thanks to Jim’s relentless questioning and that Jim will be punished for it. With Harvey on the Mayor’s side there’s not a lot Jimmy can do and so he takes his stuff and reports to Arkham Asylum where he’ll be working for the foreseeable future.

The Gay

I’m actually dealing out minus points for the queer content in this week’s Gotham.

Last week ended with Jim’s girlfriend Barbara Kean having slept with ex-girlfriend Renee Montoya, after she left Jim (it’s unclear if he’s been dumped for good) following the stress of being kidnapped. This week, however, we got no mention of it.

There was no mention of Renee or Barbara at all despite the two of them being pretty dang integral to the story. For shame Gotham, I thought you were turning things around in the gay department.

The Ugly

I was mostly disappointed by the lack of Barbara and Renee just for the fact that it seemed to suggest that them getting together last episode was a sweeps week ploy (last week was the final week of sweeps – sweeps being the time where television networks increase ratings to get more advertising money) and that it was insignificant after all.

This episode didn’t really have the ‘sizzle’ of a mid-season finale (though when we’re comparing it to the superiority of HTGAWM, maybe that’s not a valid criticism) so I would have liked the show to have increase the suspense a little.

Nonetheless, the show will be back after Christmas so you can expect a new episode of Gotham (and a new recap) then.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show that features more Bad Eggs than an abandoned farmhouse.

This week on the show there is Real Queer Content! That’s really all I need to say to get you to take interest, I know.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly, so read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

In the very first episode of Gotham we saw the billionaire couple of Thomas and Martha Wayne killed in a back alley as they walked with their son. 9 episodes into the show and all we’ve gotten so far is that Selina ‘Catwoman’ Kyle is a witness and that the killer was wearing really shiny shoes. So basically we’ve gotten nowhere.

This week we might have the smallest of leads though as main character Jim Gordon takes a visit to Harvey Dent, the goodie two shoes lawyer that Major Crimes Unit detectives Renee Montoya and Crispus Allen recommended. Providing him with the suspect sketch (that was put together with Catwoman’s help), Dent wants to go after a rich mogul type called ‘Dick Lovecraft’ (nice name, buddy) and use the idea of a witness to scare him crapless.

…only it doesn’t go like that (but when does it ever). The man is adamant that they’re looking in all the wrong places and even when Dent puts on his best scowl, Lovecraft pleads his innocence. Guilty, innocent or morally grey, this lead just evaporated into dust.

A more successful aspect of Gordon’s career is the general police beat. A fellow named Ian Hargrove (mentally ill, incredibly talented bomb maker) has just been busted out of prison by a team of Russian mobsters. Their aim? Blow some stuff up! Make some money in the process! All in a day’s work for organised criminals.

Their plan consists of two parts. First they have to use Ian’s skills to blow up a guard tower (with a rigged basket of sweet goods) to get better, more powerful explosives. Four guards dead and the explosives gotten, the mobsters think they’re well on their way to success but little did they know that Ian had slipped in a piece of metal signage into the basket, detailing his location. And that’s how Jim Gordon and Harvey Bullock show up at the mobsters warehouse.

Ian dumps the mobsters in it and tells Jim and Harvey that not only did the mobsters kidnap him and threaten to kill his brother and his family, but that they’re using these heavy duty explosives to launch an assault on one of Carmine Falcone’s vaults. Unfortunately, the world’s most useless detective duo (I mean, going to a suspect’s hideout without backup, really?) pay the price for their ineptness when the mobsters show up and shoot at them (with terrible aim) until they’re able to herd Ian off and back away from Jim and Harvey without maiming them.
Not that it deters their efforts though, as the mobsters soon meet up with their boss to discuss the finer details of the plan…it’s Fish Mooney! Of course it is. She tells them not to mess up because she has a lot riding on it, plus, once they break into Falcone’s vault, the money is theirs!

Except, not really. Showing up at the vault the next day, the mobsters (complete with Ian Hargrove) proceed to blow the bloody doors off of Falcone’s vault. But as they’re carrying the money out to their getaway truck Jim and Harvey show up to stop them. They probably deserve to be stopped since they were carrying the money out one by one but alas they somehow think they can get out of it by pulling guns on the two detectives.

Given that we still have half a season left of the show, obviously Jim and Harvey don’t die. Instead, after encouraging Ian to move a little closer to them, the truck blows up thanks to a cell-phone activated bomb under the vehicle that was set off by Mooney’s henchman, Butch, killing every single one of the mobsters in the process.

1-0 to Mooney against Falcone? Not quite. Double crossing ratbag Penguin broke into Liza’s apartment this week (Liza being the girl Mooney hired to spy on Falcone) and smells her belongings, Weird, I know. But when Penguin shows up to Mooney’s club, smelling her to confirm that Liza and Mooney are working together, it could set up a big bit of drama in the episodes to come.

Crime plots done for the week, the heterosexual romance storylines that I know we all enjoy involved the aforementioned Catwoman and rich orphan Bruce Wayne while Jim Gordon was having some relationship troubles of his own.

You see, Catwoman and Bruce ‘Future Batman’ Wayne are now living together after Gordon explained that she needed a place to stay. The two teens living together involves food fights, Catwoman being moody and Bruce’s butler Alfred having to clean up after them. It also involves Catwoman offering to kiss Bruce and Bruce telling Alfred he ‘likes’ Catwoman. I could tell you what I think is going to happen with them but let’s be honest, none of us really care!

Slightly more interesting is the fact that after being back on alcohol, former addict (and Jim Gordon’s canonically queer girlfriend) Barbara has gotten out of dodge, explaining that she needs some space. Or something. The point is she’s away from Jim…

The Gay

…and is now with (ex-girlfriend) Renee Montoya instead! Hurray!

Barbrenee (how do we feel about this portmanteau readers? Let me know in the comments) shippers get excited! This week finally showed the two having mutual feelings for each other, rather than Renee being an adorable pant-suited puppy because she still likes Barbara a whole bunch.

This week’s episode of Gotham ended with Barbara and Renee in bed together, the final scene being them kissing (just about). Honestly, it’s hardly a full makeout and there’s a lot to be said about whether this means Barbara has cheated on Jim (or if she’ll pull out that old ‘we were on a break!’ classic form Friends) but this is definitely a step forward.

The Ugly

The stuff between Bruce and Selina was boring, the crime plot was solid but nothing special and Penguin was probably in this episode for no other reason than the actor who plays him is on the payroll. That said, bringing Harvey Dent on board was a fantastic idea and Barbara/Renee is nice to see. One of the best episodes of the season, really!

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham known as the show where literally not a single person on this show is completely good and that’s brilliant.

This week on the show, main character Jim Gordon embraced that one Cyndi Lauper song (I mean True Colors, not Girls Just Wanna Have Fun) and became the morally corrupt protagonist that we all knew he could be!

As always the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly. Read on to find on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

You say office hazard and definite violation of health and safety, they say encouragement of strength, toughness and honour in the workplace! Yes, that’s the line being spun to us this week in Gotham when Jim and Harvey have to investigate a murder of a financial worker, which appears to have been done using office supplies.

Hitting up the location, the detective duo are aided by Gotham City PD boffin Edward Nygma who soon discovers that the deceased has a finger in his mouth. Trying to switch up his diet or has he did he literally manage to take a chunk out of his killer before croaking it? It’s the latter, obviously, but it soon leads them to a back alley doctor who deals with injuries that people aren’t too fond about going to the hospital about.

After a bit of (metaphorical) arm tugging, the doctor gives up a business card for some firm in the city. Naturally upon questioning why so many of his employees have limps, bruises and disfigurements and why his office is filled with really scary warrior armour and masks, the firm’s head honcho says ‘war is great and fascinating ps Jim I can totes tell that you have a killer in you bee tee dubs’.

Buying into the idea that Jim loves a good fight, Harvey leaves him to solve the case on his own and it’s why Jim is all by his lonesome when he visits one of the boss’ owned properties, discovering the scene where the murder must have taken place. Sadly, that lone wolf thing soon leads to disaster when that boss man sticks him in a circle of bad’uns and offers a million dollars to whoever can kill Jim first!

What he didn’t count on however, is that Jim can certainly hold his own and after ousting (read: killing in the name of self defense/unnecessary plot device deaths) the four bad guys, their boss is forced to take matters into his own hands. But, after a beautifully choreographed fight (props to the Gotham stunt doubles for that!), Jim nearly lumps the life force out of that guy too. Thankfully, Police Chief Essen shows up on time to stop him, feeling remorseful that she left him for dead the previous week.

Where crimes are being solved by the GCPD, the ruthless criminals of mob boss Fish Mooney and limping killer (and former Mooney assistant) Penguin are breaking laws like they do best.
Namely, Mooney is scheming and Penguin is scheming to find out what those schemes are.

After dispatching her ‘weapon woman’ to shack up with rival mob boss Falcone several weeks ago, Mooney gives her a vial filled with sleeping medicine this week and tasks her with robbing him blind. Most of the medicine doesn’t make it into Falcone’s tea but nonetheless we’ll likely see how it plays out next week. Penguin, on the other hand, simply learns that Mooney has someone close to Falcone.

Gotham’s kid heroes are having a miserable ol’ time too. After his first day of school Bruce Wayne gets the snot bullied and pummelled out of him by a group of classmates taking the micky that he doesn’t have a mom and dad. That’s really silly considering that he’s a billionaire with enough money and power to probably make their lives hell but alas, Alfred encourages him to man up and beat the crap out of the bully on his doorstep. So that he does and then they leave to get pizza, yay!

Mini Catwoman gets pulled in by the police for dragging her stolen hoard of goods in broad daylight. I’m not entirely why she was in this episode at all if I’m honest but she was, so I’m noting it.

The Gay

With Detective Renee Montoya, there was no gay. All that we did get was Barbara drinking and her boyfriend Jim, not realising that she had a serious addiction problem once upon a time, only chastising her for drinking during the day rather than y’know, checking her into rehab.

With Jim being a stone cold killer and Barbara spiralling into an alcohol fuelled…spiral, there’s a chance that they’ll break up. It;s not the nicest of circumstances but it’s certainly something for Renee/Barbara shippers to hold onto.

The Ugly

While the idea that Bruce’s beating up of the bullies was right and just made me uncomfortable (as Bruce’s guardian the fact that Alfred encouraged him to solve his problem with his fists is absolutely terrible) my biggest problem with this week’s ep is the lack of Montoya.

Of course Montoya is my favourite character, she’s a queer woman of colour for crying out loud! I wish we saw more of her is all, so hopefully she’ll make a pantsuited return next week.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where we fight crime by committing crimes and the moral code went down the pan in the pilot.

This week on the show, the helpless woman trope is played up to the max and the plot twist of all plot twists (read: a dramatic Gotham moment that would be tedious by any other show’s standards) occurs.

As always, our recaps are split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly. Read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

Still all riled up from last week, Jim Gordon is shooting for the stars. And by the stars I mean he’s attempting to become the universe’s most hopeful but utterly useless police detective.

Understanding that there’s a massive corruption plot going on in the city, Jim attempts to take everybody down. The Mayor, police officers and two mob bosses. He wants them all to pay for their heinous crimes! Realising that it’s dangerous, he sends his girlfriend Barbara out of town in an attempt to keep her safe as he dismantles decades worth of criminal activity.

If that sounds impossible in text then I assure you on screen it was even more laughable, which is exactly why Police Chief Essen (metaphorically) shoots him down, explaining that no one is willing to help.

Mob boss Falcone meanwhile wants Gordon to shut the hell up, sending a hitman after him to chase him out of town/outright kill him. He nearly does too, escaping with just a scratch. Haha, just kidding. He gets shot like three times.

He’d have been shot hundreds more had the hitman got his way but after some expert scrambling from Jim along with Crispus Allen and Renee Montoya (Renee being the ex of Jim’s girlfriend) showing up with a getaway car they’re able to take him to a veterinarian hospital so he can get patched up.

Determined to finish the job, Jim puts a plan in motion. Well, first he gets off the table and bails on bedrest the doctor’s best wishes but for some reason the show doesn’t tell Ben McKenzie (who plays Jim) to limp, so that’s neither here nor there. Next up, he takes a trip to Bruce “Batman” Wayne’s house and assures him that everything is on track and now Allen and Montoya know everything and can help out too! They’ll probably need to be on the case because after Jim’s next step he barely makes it out alive…

Squadding up with his partner, Detective Harvey Bullock, the two do what any fool with weapons training would do – sneak into Falcone’s mob den (using the Mayor and his town car as their guise), armed with just a couple of guns. Brilliant.
As you probably guess about a millisecond ago, their plan doesn’t go particularly well. Sure, they manage to hold a couple of guards at gunpoint and throw threats of jail time around but Falcone soon counters telling Gordon that Barbara never left town and that she’s securely in his clutches, y’know, ready to be killed up at the pull of a trigger.

Is he bluffing? Is he telling the truth? That question is soon answered for you when Barbara is herded into the room rightfully looking like she’s about to crap herself. It’s ok, I would be too. Thankfully for Barbara (to save her from any public embarrassment) Falcone soon chooses to let all three – Jim, Barbara and Harvey – go, the catch being “some day soon you’ll see I’m right”. Ooh, ominous.

We soon figure out just how deep Falcone’s mystique goes when Penguin shows up to provide him with information! Yes, that was the big plot twist I mentioned. Hardly gasp worthy but I couldn’t have you skipping right over to ‘The Gay’ now could I? Alas, it seems that the two have been working together for some time and Penguin has been filling him in on information about Maroni (rival mob boss and Penguin’s other boss) for a while.

More interesting than the twist itself is how it’ll play out, so hopefully we’ll see that soon.

The Gay

Like the morals of almost everyone previously mentioned (save for Montoya, Allen and Barbara), the gay rating of this week’s Gotham is also in the toilet. There’s no f/f kissing, trope-y, ratings or otherwise but what we do get is Montoya telling Jim that her “personal feelings” for Barbara got in the way of her believing his story.

Everything we’ve seen up to this point has suggested that those ‘feelings’ are currently held rather than a thing of the past. I still can’t tell if the show’s going to make a big deal of it soon but here’s to hoping.

The Ugly

This week’s episode of Gotham was marginally better than last week’s because it didn’t *completely* put me to sleep. Hardly high praise, I know.

Being rather boring is starting to become the show’s calling card at this point, but I guess it gets kudos for consistency? I’ll be back with another recap next week.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham the show where the streets are dirty, the cops are dirty and the filter this show is filmed with also looks suspiciously dirty too.

This week on the show Renee Pantsuited Badass Montoya makes a return and to be honest that’s really the only reason to watch this week’s episode.

As always, the recap is split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly so read on to find out what went down in Gotham this week.

The Plot

After weeks of being the gruff, evil-aligned bad cop to Jim Gordon’s murky grey good cop persona, we finally got a look at Harvey Bullock’s backstory. Not than anyone asked for it, mind you.

Apparently, years ago, Detective Bullock was tasked with cracking the case of a goat-themed serial killer. The spirit of The Goat fuelling his murders, the suspect had taken the eldest daughters of wealthy families before torturing them and killing them off. Lovely. Hot on the case, a younger Bullock and his partner tracked down the original killer, shooting him dead and that was the end of that, or so they thought.

Similar kidnappings spring up around the city in present day and after a visit to his old partner (who is now in a nursing home) Harvey and Jim deem that this is no ordinary copycat but is possibly a partner. Shock!

Jumping to the case the two detectives look for a common theme between the new suspect (gleaned from looking at the service personnel) and realise that both the old goat spirit killer and the new suspect were treated by the same hypnotherapist. Coincidentally enough this same therapist is treating the latest victim’s father, explaining that he is a fragile little flower who is having a hard time dealing with his daughter’s death.

He’s not so fragile after all it seems after Harvey confronts the therapist alone (don’t ask why the lead detective is this foolish, just go with it) she calls on the man to attack Harvey so she can get away with crimes she’s been committing for over a decade. Harvey fights his way out of the scuffle, making it to the staircase just in time to shoot the therapist and jack up her ankle so she can’t escape. Phew. Case closed.

Elsewhere in what was otherwise a meaningless episode, Edward Nygma caused chaos amongst filing cabinets, Penguin hobbles around looking dapper and that was almost about it in terms of a plotline…

The Gay

Like I said, almost.

Continuing on her crusade to bring Jim down and get the girl, Renee Montoya secured a key witness in Jim’s supposed killing of Penguin. She then has a heated discussion with Barbara telling her to get out of dodge because shit is about to hit The Fan and Jim is going to be arrested.

Moseying on over to the police station following Jim’s arrest, who shows up other than Penguin! Proving that he is definitely Not Dead and that Jim clearly didn’t kill him, Renee’s plot to bring Jim down falls apart like a paper towel trying to mop a puddle and Harvey tries to throw a punch because Jim didn’t kill him like he was meant to.

This is all in ‘The Gay’ section because the likelihood of Renee and Barbara getting together seems…a little improved after this week (Barbara was mad at Jim for not divulging his secrets after all) so we shall see.

The Ugly

After a few weeks of really bad episodes, this episode of Gotham was just another spanner in the show’s quality works. Not only did the storyline seem pointless, it served to provide a touching backstory for Harvey Bullock; a character that we are being made to hate, through a series of immoral choices.

Other than the final scene itself, with Penguin making a public return, this episode was mostly quite boring. It’s sad to say for a show that had potential but maybe, by the slimmest of chances, Gotham can turn this thing around.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham, the show where we’re all essentially just waiting for Bruce Wayne to go through puberty and put his many billions of trust fund money to good, crime fighting use.

This week on the show, crimes are stopped, milk is drank in large quantities and no one seems to care that Renee Montoya has been missing for two episodes now!

As always, our recaps are split into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly, so read on to find out what went down this week.

The Plot

In Gotham’s fifth episode, the dairy industry really got lucky when a chemical agent was doled out to the poor, homeless masses in the name of revolution and anarchy. Righteous! Except not really because the chemical in question caused those who inhaled it to become super strong, batcrap insane and also in need of some serious calcium. The chemical wore down their bones after a few hours, making their body crave that dairy goodness before they eventually wound up dead, deformed and decaying in the street.

Detective Jim Gordon is hot on the case though as when he’s not dealing with romantical drama stuff (see: last week’s ultimatum from his girlfriend Barbara Kean) he’s a relatively adequate detective. He and partner Bullock narrow things down to a science wiz with a dodgy ear, calling in the man’s former employers WellZyn (a company owned by Wayne Enterprises), to figure out just what he was working on and how the hell he got away with using their labs to make it.

As expected, Gordon and Bullock are spun a load of yarn by a PR person which leads them to hit up his old professor who quickly reveals that his former student was working on a boost for super-soldiers and military activities, all signed off on by WellZyn. Does this mean that Wayne Enterprises are as rotten as a week-old cheese sarnie left out in the sun? And that Bruce is going to have to don those bulletproof bat ears sooner rather than later?

Coincidentally, Bruce is doing his bit to find the answer to one of those questions as he and butler Alfred have hit up the annual Wayne Enterprises luncheon. Bruce being a headstrong kid with a total disregard of subtlety/detective smarts starts asking around about possible corruption within the company. Obviously, he gets shut down like a backyard kegger in a middle class neighbourhood but he is almost taken out too when the mad scientist shows up and sprays the newer, more powerful version of his chemical gas through the vents.

Gordon and Bullock show up to save the day, evacuate everyone and apprehend the bad guy, as the show’s formula goes. Sadly though, before he can offer more help than “go look at Warehouse 39!” he jumps off a roof and sets off a car alarm. Rest in pieces you slightly barmy lunatic.

At Warehouse 39 meanwhile, the place is empty. Who’s to blame for the sudden removal of evidence? The same lady that Bruce spoke to at the luncheon it seems, it seems, and it appears that Bruce Enterprises is corrupt and only a pre-teen who has yet to witness his first chest hair, along with his British man servant, will be able to uncover the plot!

Meanwhile, similarly shoe-horned in and trying to shake things up in Gotham this week are restaurant manager Penguin and mob boss Fish Mooney. The former has just told his new boss Sal Maroni that he knows various mob secrets that can be of use, leading to Maroni threatening to kill him, before Jim shows up to get him of that jam. The latter is sending out her talented, leggy protégé out into the wild to go and seduce mob boss with mommy issues, Carmine Falcone, so that Mooney can stage a takeover.

The Gay

Once again, the gay content was taking a short holiday with the closest we got to actual non-heterosexual activity being a scene where Mooney is teaching her protégé how to sound motherly and it leads to the two of them putting their heads together real close. It’s also worth noting that this was offset by Mooney’s secret hookup with a male mobster so a serious girlfriend is probably off the cards for now.

Jim also didn’t address the fact that Barbara threatened to break up with him last week so we’re no closer to Barbara and ex-girlfriend Renee Montoya (neither of whom were in the episode at all) getting back together.

The Ugly

Overall, this was a pretty pointless episode. Other than Wayne Enterprises most definitely being corrupt, it was very much all filler. And that’s saying something given that we sort of knew that the Wayne company was less than legit already.

Fingers crossed that Gotham will improve soon – the first season has a guaranteed 22 episodes in total so it’ll have a good amount of time to improve upon its poor run of form.

Welcome to another Gotham recap! Gotham also known as the show where where almost everything is grey including the the morals, the suits and the dreary, dreary skyline.

These week on the show the mob turf war gets #real, a small child is a better detective than anyone at the Gotham PD and Barbara gives Jim and ultimatum. It’s all very exciting!

As always, things are divided into The Plot, The Gay and The Ugly, so read on to find out what went down in Gotham’s streets this week.

The Plot

When there’s something strange, in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? Jim Gordon! Or not, as it seems as Gotham’s most upstanding detective really proves his skills (or lack thereof) this week when a professional hitman begins taking out city officials in an attempt to rock the vote.

Using a retractable steel rod and the old fashioned method of burning someone alive, the hitman in question is killing off the officials so that the control of the Arkham district (including the abandoned Arkham Asylum) will be given to one particularly mob faction. The idea is that whichever mob boss (Carmine Falcone or Sal Maroni) gets control of the district will be able to do whatever the hell they want with it and make a crap ton of money in the process. So, high stakes.

Gordon doesn’t realise this however, until he has a little visit with Bruce Wayne, who will eventually be known as Batman. According to the littlest Wayne, Falcone wants to uphold his parents’ plan to turn Arkham Asylum into a state of the art mental health institute, whilst the surrounding areas would be turned into low-cost housing. Maroni meanwhile, wants to turn the entire thing into a waste treatment centre. Gross.

It wouldn’t be dramatic if things lucked out for the ‘good guys’ (and I use that term lightly, as this is Gotham) though! And so shortly after Gordon gets into a stand-off with the hitman, whilst trying to protect Gotham’s mayor, said mayor announces that Maroni will control the asylum and Falcone will control the surrounding areas.

Helping this turf war to cause all sorts of problems for just about everybody, is Oswald Cobblepot (also known as Penguin) former assistant to mob boss Fish Mooney and current sneaky schemer.

Penguin is awkwardly limping around in a kitchen these days, after having jumped a dishwasher for his loafers last week, but he’s using his lowly position to get in Maroni’s good books. How exactly is he doing this? With more murder of course! Hiring a group a of goons to kill Maroni’s henchmen, he makes out like he’s done Maroni a favour, hiding in a freezer with a big bag of money and telling him he ‘rescued’ it from those very bad men whom Penguin is definitely not in cahoots with. Penguin is then promoted to restaurant manager giving him a prime position to listen on on any mob deals. Also, he feeds those goons some poisoned pastry so we don’t need to worry about them coming back to mess with him.

The Gay

Also causing trouble in this turf war is Fish Mooney who, in the absence of Renee Montoya (fellow Gotham PD detective and your favourite character, probably), brought the gay this week.

For reasons yet to be seen, Mooney was looking a new bit of entertainment. Both in the entertainment sense and the “”entertainment”” sense. Namely, this involved auditioning talented, attractive women and seeing what they’re made of. In quite possible the funniest line of TV I heard this week Mooney asks the two women to ‘seduce her’ which results in Mooney’s first same sex kiss on the show so far. More queer women of colour, yeah!

In a dark twist, the women have to battle it out to prove who can be a ‘weapon’ for Mooney too. The woman who kisses her beats the other to a pulp which is somehow a win because it means she’ll stick around to kiss Mooney more in the future? I think? It all happened so fast but there’s potential there. Maybe they’ll develop into adorable girlfriends, who knows.

And then, the less queer but still significant event when Barbara began to press boyfriend Jim Gordon for answers. In the episode last week, Montoya showed up to warn Barbara that Gordon killed Penguin. They kissed! And reminisced! Then, Penguin showed up.

This week in Gotham we saw the wonderful fallout of that (a bit like watching a car crash in slow motion) when Penguin didn’t introduce himself as such, meaning that Barbara still has no idea who he is or that Jim didn’t kill him, as Renee suggested. That doesn’t mean she’s going to let it go though calling out the morally grey, definitely not all good detective out on his secrets. She asks him about Penguin, he refuses to budge and after a bunch of really awkward circling Barbara is forced to admit that her and Renee used to be a thing.

Is this the part of the recap where I should say ‘Barbara has secrets too!’, ‘they’re both as bad as each other!’ well yes, probably, but Barbara doesn’t tell him about the kiss her and Renee shared either. I’m no relationship expert but keeping something like that from your partner? That’s some shady behaviour.

Moving quickly though, the couple does look to be donezo (or close enough) towards the end of the episode when Barbara shows up at the precinct and tells Jim plainly ‘either you tell me your secrets or I’ll leave your lying ass, son’. He doesn’t answer and she leaves, so grab your popcorn out for next week kids because this one’s going to get good.

The Ugly

There wasn’t a whole lot of ugly in this episode, just one thing that bothered me once I’d come down from my ‘oh my god Mooney just kissed a girl’ high.

And that was that Mooney’s storyline this week might not necessarily lead to very good representation and could just be a case of ‘let’s make her kiss her a girl, it’ll be good for the ratings’.

Can I confirm that this was the case? Obviously not! But we’ll soon know depending on how the next few episode do (or don’t) deal with it.

Expect another Gotham recap next week.