It’s the bane of every femme’s existence (and even some studs, too): That straight guy that thinks he has a magical penis that will “cure you” of your gayness. If a queer person tries to seduce a straight person, we’re labeled as “predatory”, but when straight people try to seduce gay people, they often don’t even really try.

It’s exhausting, really, to feel the need to continually justify your sexuality or stand up for your own preferences. Even worse, some women face the risk of being raped because the assumption that “this good dick” is all that’s missing in their life, and explains away why they are the way they are.

Newsflash: No one’s sexuality was ever changed by force or insistence from someone else. (Truth.)

What are the things that go through your mind when you hear that tired old line?

Not this again.

Did I forget to look gay today?

It’s really sweet that you like me that much – but, no, thank you.

 No, I’m not gay because someone hurt me.

No, I’m not gay because I lacked a positive father figure.

 No, I don’t have to look like a man to be gay.

 No, being attracted to me doesn’t make you gay.

 No, you being attracted to me does not make me attracted to you.

 No, being gay doesn’t mean I’m a pervert.

 No, I don’t want to have a threesome with you and your girlfriend.

 No, I don’t want to steal your girlfriend.

 But if you break up, feel free to send her my way.

What do you mean I don’t look like a lesbian?

And what the hell do you mean it’s a shame (or a waste) that I’m gay?

Just… No.

Have you tried sex with a man? It might change your entire world view.

She’s not my “gal pal” – she is my girlfriend, and she will kick your ass.