After a breakup of a great relationship, often tell the world you’re free, happy, and all that, but that’s usually far from the truth.
In this new hook-up era, its often cool to been seen as single rather than tied-up in a relationship. And while that may remain true to some, it’s not always the case – especially if the relationship was great.
After all, it’s human nature to want to love and be loved.
Phase 1: I’m not crying:
Well actually, it’s healthy to cry. Anyone who calls that “wallowing” has forgotten what breaking up with someone is like.
Phase 2: Her loss.
It is incredibly easy to lie to yourself repeatedly about being over them. We’d rather make ourselves believe that the breakup was less of a loss for us. We’ll go tell our friends that we’re “fine” just so we’ll feel happier for the mean time. On the contrary, however, we’re not, and only a few of our closest friends know that.
Phase 3: Socialising.
It’s only logical to think that if something you lost makes you unhappy, replace it so you can be happy again. This is why most lesbians would talk to other women straight after a break up. We don’t have those constant conversations on the phone every night or random text messaging when we’re bored. So we tend to look for it in other people. Other forms of socialising may be excessively tweeting, re-tweeting, or clicking favourite on cryptic tweets, if we have no one to talk to.
Phase 4: Depression.
Even if we converse with several people through our phones or social media most of the time, at the end of the day, we’ll always end up feeling lonely. There’s always that nagging feeling that something is missing, especially if the breakup is pretty recent. Of course, we try to put up our poker faces in front of our friends, but when we’re alone, it’s all we can think about.
Phase 5: Stalking The Ex.
Yes, we stalk our ex. Most lesbian wouldn’t admit to this, but with the presence of mutual friends and the availability of this sort of technology, it’s most likely been done by every lesbian out there. Even if your ex’s accounts are private and we’ve been blocked, we’ll always find a way to at least get a hint of what she’s up to. I mean, sometimes, we’re just get curious.
Phase 6: Exploring the ocean.
Yes, our friends would constantly tell us, “Don’t worry, there are other fish in the sea.” So, we go ahead and try fishing. Now this could either go one of two ways. One, we get to find a really decent woman whom we’re willing to date. Or two, we discover we’re just not over The Ex. It really depends on the time when this happens.
Phase 7: Begging for a second chance.
If there’s one thing we’ve learned from watching tearjerkers with The Ex, it’s that there can always be a second chance. This phase is more an internal debate phase, on whether or not we should go back and ask her for another shot. This is coupled with a few conversations with our closest friends too. How it plays out really can’t be predicted, but if we decide to go for a second chance and she accepts, we’re more likely to do better this time. If not, then there’s the next phase.
Phase 8: Getting over her.
Honestly, getting over a relationship isn’t easy. We make it seem like we’re so happy after a breakup just so we won’t appear vulnerable. As I said, it’s the ego. However, after a certain amount of time in reflection and the company of good friends, we’ll eventually get over it.