Tag Archives: Lesbian relationship

A Sneak Peek at Grey’s Anatomy And A Potential Female Suitor For Callie

Is Grey’s Anatomy Callie getting back in the dating game? In a new episode of Grey’s Anatomy, Callie (played by Sara Ramirez) will encourage colleague Owen (Kevin McKidd) to start dating again.

However, when she tries to set him up with a tech rep (Amy Motta), she is shocked to discover the rep is actually interested in her.

Creator of the hit ABC series Grey’s Anatomy, Shonda Rhimes, set in motion the break-up of long-term lesbian couple, Callie and Arizona (Jessica Capshaw) last year.

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Back in October, there was a gut punch for fans when the couple decided it was time to end their marriage together.

“When a couple breaks up, I always ask: Where does the love go? It’s not like you don’t still love the person; the love just doesn’t disappear. But you can’t love the person. It’s really great watching them try to figure out how to be friends, how to love each other as friends and co-parents, and how to support each other when the other person needs it without it being weird or without it being too much.”

Shonda Rhimes

The second half of season 11 will see Callie and Arizona learning how to best interact with each other as friends and as parents to their daughter — as well as dating new people.

“We reach a place where there is an exploration of them dating and getting back out there into the world. I didn’t want to rush it. I didn’t want to throw them at other people because I feel the same as with Owen (Kevin McKidd) — you have to be respectful of the relationship they had. We do it slowly and interestingly, and then we’re going to take our little steps. But it’s been really fun to put them out there and find people that they’re intrigued by.”

Shonda Rhimes

While it’s unclear if the out and proud bisexual Callie will date a man or a woman, Rhimes says she and star Ramirez have had a lot of conversations about the discrimination that the bisexual community often faces.

“I’ve read a lot about that concept that bisexuality has not had a lot of support. One of my favorite things that we did in the Callie and Arizona episode is Callie announcing that she’s bisexual, which by the way, I think nobody has ever done that on television, like ‘I’m bisexual,’ which I think is crazy.

I love that she’s determinedly bisexual. She’s not somebody who is straight who discovers she’s a lesbian; she’s bisexual and feels very strongly about that. That’s been interesting for us to navigate — and the character sticks to it. Arizona was always a little dismissive of that. In the early days of their relationship, the fight they always had was, ‘You’re taking a tour through being a lesbian and you’re going to go back to men.’ ” 

Shonda Rhimes

While reconciliation doesn’t appear to be in the immediate cards, Rhimes still has high hopes for Callie and Arizona winding up together.

“I’m always rooting for Arizona and Callie to be together. For me, I think they’re the perfect couple, but that’s not to say they’re going to be together. For me, they’re the perfect couple. It would make me very sad if they were apart. That doesn’t mean that they’re going to be able to work out their problems and get it together in time, for when ever the show is going to end. But I hope so. If they can, I think it would be amazing. But until they do, there’s other people to explore.” 

Shonda Rhimes

As for Arizona, she’ll be throwing herself into work and focusing on curing Dr. Herman (Geena Davis) in what Rhimes calls a “really powerful, amazing and beautiful story” between the two characters.

“What’s super cool about that is after that huge, momentous occasion, for the next six episodes — which are the only ones I know — we have not focused on Arizona and Callie in their romantic aftermath. We’ve gotten to let the characters be separate but equal, and follow them in the other part of their life — at work — and explore their passions, sense of humor and friendships.”

Jessica Capshaw

Lesbian Dating Problems

From Twin dates, to ex-girlfriend interruptions, straight-girl dating, to Ladies with the same-name as you  – dating in the lesbian world can be a trick thing.

Brittany Ashley outlines the dilemmas of dating lesbians in this great new sketch. And check out cameos from a whole host of our favourite web-based lesbians – #hashtag‘s Caitlin Bergh & Laura Zak, The Better Half‘s Amy Jackson Lewis & Lindsay Hicks, and even AfterEllen‘s chief editor, Trish Bendix, gets a spot.

Brazilians Stage Kissing Protest After Bar Kicks Out Lesbian Couple For Embracing In Public

Protesters have taken to the street in Ribeirao Preto, Brazil, with a kissing protest against homophobic treatment of two women.

About 50 Brazilian protesters responded with kisses on Sunday at a bar that had kicked out a presumed lesbian couple for embracing in public. The management of the bar in the town of Ribeirao Preto said in a statement the women, ages 22 and 23, had been shown the door a week ago for “inappropriate behaviour.”

The women immediately filed a complaint with the police and a Brazilian lawyers’ association commission against homophobia.

At Sunday’s protests, youths carried signs denouncing homophobia and engaged in a “beijaco,” or collective kissing, as police looked on.

A bill to punish homophobia has been sidelined for years in the Brazilian Congress by resistance from Catholics and Protestant Evangelicals.

In 2011, however, the Supreme Court guaranteed same-sex couples in stable unions the same rights as heterosexual couples.

Lesbians Explain Sleeping With Straight Girls

So as we all know women are hot and irresistible, which is why there are a lot of ladies out there curious about sleeping with another women; and even though many people may identify as straight, that doesn’t stop them from thinking about the same gender-loving.

So, here is where the lesbian and bisexual women come in to play – hello. 

We often become the experimental plaything; be it for a drunken kiss, a high school crush, a college romance or two-year relationship before she decides to settle down.

There are quite a few straight women out the seeking first-time lesbian sexual experience and on flip there are a lot of queer women who can’t object.

Lesbians Explain Sleeping With Straight Girls

Hallmark’s Valentine’s Day Ad Features A Real-Life Lesbian Couple

Hallmark has joined Tiffany & Co. in championing diversity with its new Valentine’s Day campaign, titled ‘Put Your Heart to Paper’. which includes interviews with real couples, who are asked how they feel about one another without using the word love.

Probably the sweetest of the bunch is the relationship between Eugenia and Corinna, and we learn about their quirks and their steadfast love for each other. Beautiful and touching, it sends a heartwarming message that love comes in all forms.

Watch the ad below and view the other ads in the campaign after.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6XGYifGseg

A Reality Show Looking To Shift The Lines Between Gender And Sexuality

Could Marcus Parker be the next big reality star? Yes – I watched the first minute of the below show reel and was hooked.

Marcus Parker is a husband, a Christian and father to three young children, but he’s hardly traditional. Why, because Parker is also drag queen called Flame Monroe, who happens to be bisexual that is married to a lesbian butch, and also self-identified a transgender person, having had surgical interventions to create breasts and other feminine characteristics – WOW!

Post by Rasheda Daniel.

“Before I had children, I was living a whole ‘nother life—I was living as a girl 24 hours a day. My sacrifice came when I had children and their mom left, and I had a choice: Do I take my career, or do I take my children?

I’m a transgender man who lives his life now as a man, so that my children can have some kind of normalcy in their lives. Because I’m already extreme.”

Marcus Parker

I guess what makes the story line so interesting the shifting lines between gender and sexuality. Parker’s political and moral commitments challenge the idea that all queer people must share the same values.

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This story throws out so many questions – is he a trans* woman or a drag artist? Does his living as a man mean he’s doing a male drag act at home? And what is the correct label to use about his sexuality considering his relationship is now with a female soft-butch lesbian.

But deep down, what is clear, is a show like this demonstrate that these kinds of questions don’t really matter. Parker has made a family and a life for himself that clearly brings him joy, so the details shouldn’t concern us.

And as we advance as a culture and society these individual cases will become less unique – gender and sexuality will not be an issue.

So Did Naya Rivera Come Out As Bisexual or Not?

If you spent any amount of time in Glee’s bubble of rabid Tumblr fans circa 2011 then you would have been treated to plenty of speculation about Naya Rivera’s sexuality. It has often been suggested that the actress, who plays lesbian Santana Lopez on the cult TV series, isn’t just a straight ally but is a member of the queer community herself.

There were once suggestions that she was secretly dating her Glee co-star Heather Morris (who plays Santana’s fiancée Brittany). While it may have been a case of overexcited fans with overzealous imaginations, they were backed up by Naya’s own Facebook posts that hinted that they were together, the famous kiss from the Glee tour and the fact that the two actresses just look adorable together.

But after those rumours fizzled out and Naya dated men – including rapper Big Sean and her recent marriage to actor Ryan Dorsey – could Naya have been queer after all? During a recent appearance on daytime talk show The View, the Glee actress possibly came out as bisexual.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kw9wLDfcn8E

On the episode of The View that aired on the 14th of January, out, gay presenter Rosie O’Donnell explained that “new research found that women who are bisexual are more likely to suffer mental health problems than lesbians”. To which Naya replied “No wonder, Rosie! No wonder I’m crazy, this just solves it all”.

While it could have been a case of Naya just wanting to chime in with her two cents on the state of female mental health, the fact that Naya pointed out her own mental health issues after the study (and Rosie’s words) directly referred to the mental health problems of bisexual women seems to suggest that Naya herself is bisexual.

Cynics have suggested that it may just be a ploy from the actress to drum up attention. During another appearance on The View Naya also made the outlandish claim that “ethnics” do not shower as often as white people, comparing her own shower habits to her husband’s, saying that she only showers a few times a week but he showers several times a day.

Of course she may have just accidentally put her foot in it (she has since apologised and explained that her comments were a joke) but as it got so many people talking about her in the last week, many people believe that she is just doing it for attention.

Attention seeking or not, many Glee fans are positively giddy at the prospect that the actress behind one of their favourite queer TV ladies may be queer in real life too. There hasn’t been a confirmation or a denial from Naya or her representatives just yet though, but we’ll keep you posted.

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Our First TV ‘Awww’ Moment of 2015 as Glee’s Brittany and Santana Get Engaged

Once hailed as a bastion of queer television characters for the way that Kurt Hummel was unapologetic in his sexuality in a time where few shows put LGBT characters as the leads, Glee was actually notorious for treating its queer female characters poorly.

For example, Brittany and Santana (also known as Brittana) came about because of a throwaway line about the two girls sleeping together in season one and it was pressure from fans that forced Glee to make them an official item in season two.

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Then, there was the fact that Brittany and Santana didn’t get to kiss until season three, by which time couples like Kurt and Blaine, and Finn and Rachel had kissed each other plenty.

In contrast, during Glee’s famous body swap episode actors Kevin McHale and Amber Riley got to kiss each other (their characters had body swapped with Brittany and Santana), while Brittany and Santana (as played by two women) didn’t get to kiss for some episodes later.

Furthermore, there have been throwaway lines about lesbians not wanting to date bisexual women, a poorly handled Brittana break up (when Santana couldn’t do a long distance relationship) and dialogue that ridiculed Glee’s queer female fandom.

But as the show enters its sixth and final season, could the musical dramedy finally be ready to make amends? It appears so, as season six of Glee looks to be a bit of a throwback to all of the characters and relationships we loved long ago.

Puck and Quinn are back together, Kurt is still pining after Blaine (despite Blaine dating Karofsky), and Brittany and Santana are loved up and singing adorable duets in the school’s choir room as though they didn’t graduate ages ago.

Following their latest mashup of Alanis Morissette’s “Hand In My Pocket” and Carole King’s “I Feel The Earth Move” it all gets a bit emotional. Santana gets down on one knee and proposes.

After an earlier scene in the episode where Brittany tells Santana that “I will love you until infinity,” and the two make plans to live in New York together, Santana proposes simply to which Brittany says yes.

However, will Glee make good on its same-sex marriage promises? Although Brittany and Santana are a bit young to be getting engaged, Santana’s not fussed and she proceeds to keep Kurt an ear lashing when he brings up this very point.

Furthermore, back in November Naya Rivera who plays Santana on the show shared this cheeky snap of a veil on Instagram, suggesting that not only is Glee quite ahead with their filming but that we will most definitely be seeing Santana in a wedding dress by the end of the season.

We’ll keep you posted once we have more on the upcoming nuptials.

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Rapper Angel Haze Records Coming Out Freestyle to ‘Same Love’ Beat.

Rapper, Angel Haze has just released her own unique version of ‘Same Love’ – one of the biggest LGBT themed songs to be released ever – and boy is her version powerful, raw and honest.

Haze, who identifies as pansexual and eschews gender pronouns in her music, always exhibits an insatiable thirst for authenticity and a take-no-prisoners attitude, making her rapid-fire rhymes all the more compelling.

She is currently dating model Ireland Baldwin (the daughter of Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger). The couple made their red carpet debut at the MTV Movie Awards in August last year, since dating rumours begun months before. They have since been outspoken about her relationship, supporting each other the long away.xcvbnmnb

[soundcloud url=”https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/116460209″ params=”color=ff5500″ width=”100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

At age 13 my mother knew I wasn’t straight
she didn’t understand but she had so much to say
she sat me on the couch looked me straight in my face
and said you’ll burn in hell or probably die of AIDS
it’s funny now but at 13 it was pain
to be almost sure of who you are and have it ripped away
and i’m sorry if it’s too real for some of you to fathom
but hate for who you love is not exactly what you’d imagine
and i guess it was disastrous
cause everything that happened afterwards was just madness
locked away for two years to keep me on the inside
because she’d rather see a part of me die than me thrive
and it’s tougher when it’s something you can’t deny
and ignorance teaches us it’s something that you decide
you’re driven by your choice is an optical illusion
here’s to understanding that it’s not always confusion

Angel Haze

Watch the original – Macklemore and Ryan Lewis ft Mary Lambert

Kristen Stewart Touches Base on Recent Tabloid Rumours

The Tabloids can’t seem to cope without going to press with a ‘new’ Kristen Stewart story. However, in a recent interview with HuffPost Live, the actress appeared to take all the rumors in stride.

The former Twilight actress (who has always attempted to keep her love life private) hit the headlines when she was spotted with ‘close friend’ Alicia Cargile on holiday.

Photos published by a number of tabloids showed the pair holding hands and snuggling on a Hawaii beach.

While talking with HuffPost Live, Stewart avoided addressing the claims directly, saying:

“There’s a whole other form of entertainment that’s just voraciously consumed in itself.”

Kristen Stewart

Co-star Julianne Moore then interjects with:

“For her, especially, there’s been so much interest in Kristen for the longest time. Because of the size of the movies she’s been involved in when she was very young, it’s hard to escape that. I think that it’s also a form of entertainment. I think you have to take all that stuff with a grain of salt, and she often does.”

Julianne Moore

Watch the full interview here…

The Funeral of Vanessa Collier Cancelled, Because Pastor Objected To Memorial Video Of Her Kissing Her Wife

The funeral of Vanessa Collier was due to be held at New Hope Ministries in Lakewood, Colorado and was attended by hundreds of her family and friends. However, 15 minutes before the funeral was due to start, the pastor informed the family that the funeral could not go ahead due to the inappropriate content in the video to be shown during the service.

Pastor Ray Chavez objected to the photo of Vanessa kissing her wife, Christina Higley, as well as photo of her proposing. They were told it could only go ahead if the photos were edited out. What’s more, the family said the ministry had the videos that day before, but did not review them until the morning of the service.

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Instead, her family decided to move to the funeral home across the street, which only had a capacity of 60 people. Her casket was closed and driven across in the hearse.

Vanessa was 33 when she died, and left behind her wife and two children. Her family had informed the New Hope Ministeries of her sexuality, and had the video approved by them two days before the service.

Her cousin, Jessica Maestras who helped organise the funeral, said of it being moved:

“It was disgusting. 180 people had to squeeze into a room that held about 60 people. The only other thing they asked me was to have these videos ready two days prior so they could review them. I provided the video, and got the okay from the funeral home that we would be able to show it.”

Jessica Maestras

On Tuesday, friends and family of Collier were back at new Hope Ministries protesting the events that happened over the weekend.

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“I am against bigotry and stand with my friend Vanessa Collier’s family in seeking an apology and refund from Pastor Ray Chavez and New Hope Ministries. The acts that took place at her funeral were wrong and no family should ever have to go through that.”

Jose Silva

Pastor Ray Chavez, the man who cancelled the services, has refused to comment, but has however refund the family’s money.

Why The Tabloid Obsession With Kristen Stewart and Her ‘Lez-be-Friend’ relationship?

Ever since she hit it big with the vampire series that everybody loves to hate (Twilight), Kristen Stewart’s personal life has been tabloid fodder. Headlines were made about her romance with co-star Robert Pattinson, they were made again when she appeared to have cheated on him with the director of Snow White and the Huntsman (a film that she starred in) and a fair few outlets have speculated that Kristen Stewart is gay.

Is it the fact that Kristen once said that her her first crush was Natalie Portman? Or that time on the Snow White and the Huntsman press tour when she said she wanted to make out with Charlize Theron? The reasoning is somewhat of a mystery.

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However, while we were pondering the ‘why’ of the rumours, they’ve flared up once more as the actress has gone on vacation with her gal pal Alicia Cargile, leading many to assume once again that Kristen is gay and that Alicia is her girlfriend.

Kristen and Alicia (who is a visual effects producer) reportedly became close friends following Kristen’s breakup with Robert Pattinson. The timing and the fact that the two appear to be inseparable (they’re often seen together, sometimes in matching or shared clothes) has led to people thinking they’re dating.

The dating rumours are backed up by sources previously saying that “Love is love to Kristen. She’s really happy with Alicia”, “When Kristen and Alicia were in Hawaii for New Years, I am sure that they thought no one was going to see them but they are not exactly nonchalant about their relationship anymore” and “They are inseparable and mimic each other’s everything”.

So is Kristen gay? Is she straight? Is she bisexual? Well, we have no idea. Not only are those sources anonymous (or those quotes could have just been made up by the publications they came from) but Kristen is notoriously closed off about her personal life. We didn’t even get a confirmation that she was dating Robert Pattinson until they broke up years later.

Overall though, if Kristen Stewart is gay as all the tabloids would have us believe, then good for her. And if she wants to come out Ellen Page style then hey, Valentine’s Day is right around the corner.

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Jane Lynch Discusses Glee and Gay Divorce

In a conversation with HuffPost Live’s Alyona Minkovski, Jane Lynch discusses the season final of Glee, her character Sue and her divorce.

“With Gay Marriage Is Going To Come Gay Divorce”

Jane Lynch

Jane Lynch doesn’t have much to say about the implications of her divorce from Lara Embry last October, but when pushed she says she felt pressure to maintain a certain family unity as a famous, gay, married woman.

“I mean, with gay marriage is going to come gay divorce. It’s just how it goes. Where’s my parade?”

Jane Lynch

Lynch previously insisted that her divorce was ‘not a horrible thing’ and friends explained the actress wanted to stay friends with Lara for the sake of her former spouse’s 10-year-old daughter, Haden.

“It’s not dramatic. It’s not a horrible thing. It’s something that we’re dealing with. It’s two people who just decided it’s better to go apart than stay together.”

Jane Lynch

Channel 4’s TV Presenter Anna Richardson Announces Her Relationship With Out Comedian Sue Perkins

Anna Richardson, the presenter of Secret Eaters has revealed that she and Sue Perkins are in a relationship, resulting in the pair trending around the world on social media.

Speaking on the daytime TV show, she said:

We’ve known each other for a few years, we’ve got mutual friends – you know what it’s like in TV, you tend to know people. I was with my boyfriend for nearly 20 years and I’ve known Sue on the circuit, but about a year and a half ago we met at a party and I was recently single and we just… all I can say, there was an understanding between us and for me the planets aligned and I just thought, ‘This person’ – it’s not even about a woman – ‘this person is absolutely extraordinary’.”

Continuing she said:

People become obsessed with sex and just want to know, ‘What is it you do in bed?’… It’s not about that, it’s about the person and it’s about the connection with that person.”

Sue Perkins is a popular TV presenter in UK, who has spent much of her career out of the closet. She is best known for working with Mel Giedroyc on the BBC’s ‘Great British Bake Off’, but the pair will soon be presenting a new daytime chat show for rival TV company, ITV.

Taiwanese Queen of Pop, Jolin Tsai Tells Touching Lesbian Love Story in New Music Video

Taiwanese queen of pop, Jolin Tsai, showcases a beautiful lesbian love story in her new video about same-sex marriage.

The video is for her new song ‘We’re All Different, Yet the Same’, which is based on the true story of a lesbian couple who have been together for more than 30 years. When of the women are hospitalized due to old age and required emergency surgery, her partner not able to sign the consent form, because she was not a legal spouse or family member. She then has to call around to try and find her partner’s estranged family members to the sign the form.

The music video has already received a lot of attention in Taiwan, where same-sex marriage is a hot topic.

The video focuses on a lesbian marriage where Jolin Tsai kisses Ruby Lin. The kiss was an impromptu suggestion from the director and took an hour to film – WOW!

‘People used to tell me that I look like Ruby Lin. I finally met her today, and we kissed on our first meeting’

Jolin Tsai

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X Factor’s Mel B – ‘I Did Have a Four-year Relationship With a Woman’

Former Spice Girl, Mel B, told the Guardian:

“I did have a four-year relationship with a woman. But I’ve been very happily married for seven years to a penis. Ha ha! An amazing guy. I’ve definitely not been shy or been one to hold back. If I wanted to try something, I did. I had a girlfriend. So what?”

Mel B

The 39-year-old denied rumours that she has been ‘intimate’ with women since marrying current husband Stephen Belafonte in 2007.

“No, me and my husband are very tight and solid. But I will be the first one to compliment a woman, to say to my husband, ‘Oh my God, look at her legs’, or, ‘Doesn’t she look stunning?’ I do think women are gorgeous. Crazy but gorgeous.”

Mel B

The singer opened up earlier this month about having had relationships with women in the past, but said she does not identify as gay.

“… I’m happily married. People call me lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual, but I know who’s in my bed and that’s it … I have a huge libido and a great sex life.”

Mel B

Lesbian in a (Gay) Man’s World

There has always been this belief that lesbians and gay men don’t get on, or don’t like each other. To a certain extent I think this is still true, especially amongst some of the older community.

Some of my older male friends will tell me stories of the man-hating ‘diesel dykes’ that would cause trouble or create confrontation when a man was in ‘their bar’. I still find it quite shocking things were like this 20/30+ years ago, especially when back then everyone essentially wanted the same thing; equality.

Thankfully, the LGBT community has come on leaps and bounds and for the most part we happily mix.

I’m far from being a lesbian that hates men. I love men. I feel like I am more like one of the guys. As I’m writing this now I’m sitting with 5 guys. They’re not camp (until 5 pints anyhow). They’re men. They’re just blokes. If that makes sense.

In a way it surprises me, because growing up I never really had a positive male role model in my life. All my role models were strong women. Men cheated, ran away from their responsibilities and were generally emotionally useless. I saw men as the weaker sex. In certain ways I still do, but unless I need to ‘talk’ or cry, I still prefer their company.

I used to hang out with women more, but I always felt a little out of place. Not involved in, not understanding or simply not interested in their conversations. They’d discuss work a lot, which bored me. They were all very political. Very intense about who they’d be voting for. Whereas I really couldn’t give a flying ****.

They baked a lot. They gardened. I hate gardening. And baking.

They were all very, well, gay. Very gay rights, very active in pushing equal rights for women. I shan’t expand more on that because to be completely honest I’ve not a clue what I’m talking about. It isn’t a bad thing, not at all, it just isn’t for me. I’m clearly far from being a feminist.

But I like the ease of hanging out with the guys. I like the conversation, nothing is usually too serious, but if it does get serious, we can have a good debate. We laugh more. I feel I’m looked after. It’s like having 30 big brothers, and I guess in the same way I’m looked after like a little sister. They’re always around, between my work and social life, always on the end of the phone or 5 minutes away if I need one of them.

Love the guys, girls. And after all, it’s great having no competition.

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6 things I’ve Learned About Relationships by Megan Luscombe

1. Debates, arguments, bickers and disagreements aren’t always a ‘bad thing’

Most people believe any sign of discomfort such as a disagreement or argument equals a doomed relationship.

We all know that no two people are the same, nor are they going to always share the same opinion or views. Conflict is bound to come up to the surface after you’ve spent enough time with someone; it’s how relationships are.

Arguments, debates, bickering etc becomes an issue when things spiral out of control and become violent, aggressive, destructive and emotionally manipulative.

Once a couple learns to have effective disagreements/arguments they can see and feel more satisfied with the outcomes. They then understand that whilst arguments and disagreements are unpleasant experiences to have, that if their effectively worked through the growth can be beneficial for the development of the individuals and overall relationship.


2. Each individual within the relationship has a responsibility to understand their own perceptions/misconceptions and issues

The stubborn individuals (like me) might find this requires a tad more effort than others.

There may be certain occasions when we are upset/hurt by something our partner has said, this is due to how we have heard it or perceived it have been delivered. Many individuals in moments like these instead of questioning the comment will remain closed lipped, and left feeling hurt.

If we are left feeling hurt or offended by our partner’s words it is our responsibility to understand why.

Are we upset because what they said has truth to it? Are we upset because we don’t like being wrong? Are we upset because our partner is right? Are we upset because our partner has called us out on something that makes us uncomfortable?

If you honestly believe your partner has said something to INTENTIONALLY HURT YOUR FEELINGS than that’s a RED FLAG because intentional malicious words are not healthy in any form of relationship. Ever.

Take the time to follow up questions that have hurt your feelings or perhaps ‘rubbed you the wrong way’ with a sentence like ‘when you said that did you mean this…because that’s how I heard it’. This way you are clarifying the situation before it blows into something unnecessary.


3. A relationship requires continuous support, dedication, effort and prioritisation from both individuals in order to survive –

There are TWO people in a relationship, which means both need to bring their ‘A game’ to the table. A relationship will become boring, stale or routine when both parties allow it (harsh truth). I have heard the following comments from couples:

We used to go on date nights all the time

We just don’t have the time anymore to do things together

We’re becoming two different people, I’ve lost the spark

I don’t even remember what we used to be like anymore, I only remember it was fun

I’d like to laugh with them again

People become lazy, distracted or unfocused and this is why relationships can become repetitive, stale and uninteresting. Instead of looking at what’s right in front of them, their eyes and minds focus on work, children, bills and other things.

Whilst I understand that certain things require priority and even immediate attention (such as raising children, paying bills etc) it is equally as important to ensure that your relationship receives the SAME LEVEL OF PRIORITY.

I understand it can be hard to juggle many things at a time but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Couples owe it to themselves to ensure that they are prioritising their partner and relationship.

  • Schedule in date nights, just because they’re planned doesn’t mean they’re not romantic
  • Order take out, rent a movie and sit on the couch together for a cuddle.
  • Cook for each other
  • Demonstrate your love for each other in ways you know the other person would appreciate it. Maybe a back rub? Maybe tell your partner how much you appreciate them in the morning before they go to work? Why not run a bath for your partner while you put the clothes on the line? All of these demonstrate that your partner and relationship is a priority for you.

4. Independence and individualism are healthy

A healthy relationship has two individuals in it that are allowed their own ‘me’ time. Living out of each other’s back pockets can have a negative impact on the relationship. It’s great to have time where you can do things you like that maybe your partner doesn’t enjoy as much. That way when you both reconvene afterwards and have something fun and interesting to talk about!

Maybe your partner wants to go away for a weekend with their family or best friends? Fantastic! Looks like you get to do what you want that weekend and when they’re home Sunday night why not grab dinner together and have a chat about your weekends?

Maybe you want to go for a coffee with friends while your partner stays home? Great! Looks like they get to catch up on those TV series that you don’t watch and relish in their own ‘me time’.

If you’re wanting to spend every moment with your s/o, that’s completely fine and up to you! However, a relationship that exists on top solid foundation can certainly allow for ‘me time’ as opposed to ‘us time’. Don’t ever feel guilty about it!


5. The person you’re dating you should actually LIKE

If you’d never dated and still know that you’d want to be friends with them, you’re most certainly onto a winner!

Relationships work well and thrive best when the two individuals have a great friendship built on trust and mutual respect.


6. Trust, Transparency and Honesty –

Can’t leave your phone around your partner? Worried they’re reading your text messages whilst you’re in the shower? Scared to tell your partner how you’re really feeling about something because of how they’ll react?

These might sound funny or trivial to you but they’re real scenarios I’ve heard from many couples over the past 6 months.

They are each in their own right RED FLAGS in a relationship. Unless you are being secretive because you’re planning a surprise holiday, birthday, proposal or anniversary celebration nothing in your relationship should require secrecy.

Also, if something has bothered you in your relationship you should be able to talk about it and bring that issue up (if you want to or you believe it’s worth a discussion)

 

Must Watch, Lost Girl Season 5 Promo Finally Out

While the announcement of Lost Girl’s end has come as a shock for its many fans, for those who have been watching the Canada-made series since its introduction in 2010, it’s not a completely bad thing either.

In the past four series Lost Girl has prided itself on unbridled sexuality, queer identity and sheer ass-kicking power from both the guys and the girls.

Sexualities in the show aren’t labelled – Bo is seen as bisexual as she feeds off of sexual energy to heal herself and she takes both male and female lovers, most notably the human doctor, Dr. Lauren Lewis and shape-shifting wolf, Dyson, but neither the character nor the show ever says ‘gay’ or ‘bisexual’ to describe themselves or anyone else.

It’s that in part that’s made it such a hit but admittedly, even with the popular Bo/Dyson/Lauren love triangle at its core and each episode weaving a tale of supernatural intrigue, the love for Lost Girl has waned a little.

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Season 1 was a popular introduction to the somewhat Buffy-esque show and it aired in 13 episodes, but in Season 2 there were 22 episodes and by Season 3 of Lost Girl came around, the show had lost a showrunner (series creator Michelle Lovretta) and the long season seen previously had seen Lost Girl lose a bit of its sheen. Emily Andras was showrunner for Season 3 and 4 but for many fans the plot seemed to grate or bore depending on their attention span. So it’s good that Season 5 will be the end then and it too has another new showrunner, with Andras leaving recently. When it airs the first of its final episodes this December we’ll be able to give a good send off to an iconic piece of queer media.

Lost Girl Faewell – Weirdest Moments

Former Spice Girl Mel B Opens Up About Her Sexuality and Past Relationships With Women

Former Spice Girl Mel B has opened up about having had relationships with women in the past, but said she does not identify as gay.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOIXupfD4Go

In an interview with Alan Carr on his TV Show, Mel B was asked about whether she knew any women who had same-sex relationships in the past.

“Yeah, I was one of those for a few years.”

Mel B

The 39-year-old was asked by Carr whether she identifies as a lesbian, to which she said:

“I would not call it that. I was just one of those ladies . Now I’m happily married.”

Mel B

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’10 Worst Ways To Break Up’ by YouTubers Bria And Chrissy

With over 48 million views and 300 thousand combined subscribers, the performing duo known as BriaAndChrissy has quickly become YouTube’s most popular singing lesbian couple. Known for their catchy songs with inspiring lyrics, the two use music and comedy to promote equality.

Watch their latest video ’10 Worst Ways To Break Up’

Do lesbians Need a Prenup? Jane Lynch is Maybe Thinking so This Week

Do lesbians need a prenup? A question I never expected to ask this sunny morning. However, Jane Lynch maybe thinking so this week, after her divorce was finalized on Monday.

A year after the divorce proceedings between Jane Lynch and her estranged wife (Dr. Lara Embry) slightly sour, their union is now officially dissolved. But is come at a price.

According to TMZ reports, Lynch will need to pay a lump sum of $1.2 million spread out over two years to her former wife.

Dr. Embry will also get fifty percent of the funds in a number of bank accounts, including a 401(k); fifty percent of Lynch’s TV royalties; fifty percent of their $56,810 tax refund; their yacht club membership; and the family dog.

Embry, a psychologist, had initially asked for spousal support to the tune of $94,000 a month, claiming that during her three-year marriage to Lynch she had grown accustomed to spending nearly $6,500 per month on clothes, $12,000 per month on entertainment and vacations, and $4,500 per month on dining out. WOW!

The divorce was finalized on Monday.

South Korea Bans Music Video Because it Appears to Portray Very Vanilla Lesbian Relationship

A music video from the Chinese girl group SNH48, which features two women from 16-member group ‘caressing’ and ’embracing’, has been banned by South Korea.

SNH48 is the Chinese sister group of the hugely popular Japanese group AKB48. Their recent video for song ‘Uza’ was removed from South Korean digital channels after less than three days online.

Korean media is now speculating that a music video for has been banned in the country because of ‘intimate’ scenes between two of the women.

Something to note is the video was actually shot in South Korea and directed by popular music director Hong won-ki.

 

It is legal to be gay in South Korea, but the country does not offer same-sex marriage or civil partnerships for same-sex couples. Lesbian couples can not adopt and there is no anti-discrimination legislation to help protect LGBT people.

Efforts to include protection of sexual orientation in the Anti-Discrimination Act are opposed by religious groups and have been thus far unsuccessful.

At KitschMix we wonder if this video made it onto Korean screens…

Or this…

 

Hmmmm, The Pros and Cons of a #FriendsWithBenefits Relationship

The companionship of a good friend is second to none. There is just something so enjoyable in talking and spending time with a friend. But what happens when a sexual attraction develops between you? Is it a good idea to become friends with benefits?

First and foremost you need to ask yourself if you are capable of having this kind of a relationship. If you associate sex with love, tend to get jealous easily or fall head over heels in love with good sexual partners, this is not your thing.

One of the benefits of a friend with benefits relationship is the freedom. The ability to have fun with someone without a commitment. It is convenient with no pressure. When you get tired of it you just move on. It sure beats staying at home and watching that TV show on Friday.

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Maybe you are busy in school or a career and not looking for a serious relationship. We all have needs and having an endless number of lovers is not a good idea. Plus, a friend knows you. He knows how you react to certain things and what turns you on. A recipe for a good time.

So is it all rosy in this type of a relationship? Not by a long shot. When you start a relationship with no rules or boundaries you stay there. You cannot go back and start over again. Once the physical attraction wanes the friendship starts to die as well.

The most expensive cost of this casual relationship though is the lack of commitment. When you give and give expecting nothing in return. You give your time, body and emotions without a commitment you sell yourself short. Commitment is the price you pay in any healthy relationship.

At the end of the day you should weigh the pros and cons then decide for yourself. Remember to be true to who you are and who you want to be in the future.

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Pretty Little Liars Christmas Special: Everything We Know So Far

Spoiler alert! The midseason finale of Pretty Little Liars was a big’un. Things are always dark in Rosewood aka the murder capital of the world but in that episode it really lived up to its (unofficial) nickname as fan favourite Mona Vanderwaal was killed off. We even saw her dead body; it was grim.

The liars also fell out with Ali in a big way as the queen of lies and deception began to plot against Emily, Spencer, Hanna and Aria despite the group previously being her best friends and it left us with a plethora of new questions and an intricate web of mystery.

What other secrets is Ali holding? Does she have the power do blackmail the liars? And has she been ‘A’ all along? Aaargh! So much has been left unanswered but we’ll be one step closer to a solution later this year when Pretty Little Liars returns for its Christmas special.

So what do we know so far? Like many of the Halloween specials before it, PLL’s Christmas themed episode is centred around one big party. The theme is ‘Winter Wonderland’ so we’re told and so the liars –plus Ali and her henchpeople – are suitably dressed in icy blue and white attire. I’m not quite sure how dresses are appropriate for Winter weather but it’s Pretty Little Liars so let’s just go with it.

Aria will also be dancing with her boyfriend, English teacher Ezra Fitz, but it won’t all be slow dances under the disco ball for Rosewood’s most famous, definitely illegal couple. The episode is called “How the ‘A’ Stole Christmas” so the infamous villain (or the villainous group) will be back to cause mischief like the Grinch, but with more black hoodies.

Furthermore, A’s plotting includes some Christmas-themed spooks. There’s no word yet on what they are yet but Mona Vanderwaal makes a return as the ghost of Christmas past, with Janel Parrish who plays the deceased teen explaining that she’s “going to be in the Christmas special as the ghost of Christmas past, present and future, and in the second half of the season there will be more Mona flashbacks”.

In a more festive holiday spirit though, the liars, along with Paige, Jenna, Lucas and Sydney, visit the Shady Days Nursing Home to sing some Christmas carols!

Even Ali celebrates the right way as the cunning teen gets her smooch on at the party with someone dressed like Santa Claus, according to Pretty Little Liars writer Bryan Holdman. It’s unclear just who is dressed up as Santa though (some fans are hoping that it’s Emily, despite her and Paige looking pretty loved up in the teaser photos) so that will be one of many big reveals when the episode airs in December.

Breaking News: Vaginal Orgasms ‘Don’t Exist and The G-spot is a Myth’

There is no such thing as a vaginal or clitoral orgasm and the G-spot is a myth.

Well, that’s the conclusion of a group of researchers who want us to start coining the term ‘female orgasm’.

Why? Well, according to the team, it basically means the whole of a woman’s vagina needs to be stimulated effectively to create an orgasm – Dah! That includes the clitoris, the vestibular bulbs on either side of the vagina, and the pars intermedia – a band that joins the vestibular bulbs.

Their findings – published in the journal Clinical Anatomy – found that most women don’t have orgasms during penetrative sex.  And as a result, women have been labelled with sexual problems that are based on something that doesn’t exist: the vaginal orgasm.

The review did find that the clitoris is the key to all female orgasms, as the clitoris is a women most erogenous zone.

However, it is possible for ‘all’ women to orgasm if all their ‘female erectile’ organs (clitoris, vestibular bulbs, and pars intermedia) are effectively stimulated.

The review, comes after a U.S. study published earlier this year found that the size of a woman’s clitoris can impact their ability to have an orgasm.

In women who have orgasm problems, the clitoris is smaller and located farther from the vagina, the study found.

The researchers said their findings could lead to new treatments for women suffering from anorgasmia, who are unable to have orgasms.

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15 Bisexual Problems When Dating

Bisexual – then you’ll recognise some of these classics. In fact, most women in LGBT community have probably heard one of two of these questions, because even though we’re living in the 21st century, a host of stereotypes still exist.

This new BuzzFeed sketch features a woman who identifies as bisexual and another who identifies as a lesbian, as they go to a party together and introduce themselves as girlfriends.

The partygoers’ responses highlight the ridiculous assumptions people still make about bisexuality.

“You guys must be having so many threesomes.”

Relationship Dilemmas – We Hate Them, But Here is Some Advice on How to Deal With Them

The world of dating is not for the faint hearted. It is a battle to find and woo your princess amidst all the rot and filth. Here are a couple of relationships dilemmas and how to deal with them.

To leave or not to leave a cheating girlfriend

This one is pretty easy to sort out. If it’s the first time and her excuse is believable, give her a second chance. If it’s not the first time, with or without an excuse get out of there. True cheats always repeat the mistake.

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In love with two people at the same time

This is a tough one. Get the emotions out of the picture. Judge the two of them using a different scale. Their life choices, education, success, focus in life, looks or whatever is important to you. Pick the one who comes out on top.

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To reveal or not to reveal what you like in bed

The fear is that if you reveal what you like she might think you’re a freak. So you bottle it inside. A relationship is a leap of faith. Take it step by step. Find a suitable time to talk about your needs and then worry about the next step. The worst that can happen is for her to say no.

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To tell or not to tell about your past

It depends on which stage of the relationship you are in. If you just met or still in the early stages, don’t give her your life history. On the other hand if you’re getting serious the skeletons in your closet should be gently explained to your future partner. There is nothing as bad as keeping secrets as they tend to come out at the most unfortunate time.

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Get intimate or not

Getting into bed with someone is a huge commitment. Sure there are one night stands and all sorts of arrangements, but its serious business. The rule is not too fast or too early.

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Watch : Heartfelt Interview With Lesbian Couple Who have Been together 72 Years

We covered this story last week, but watch and listen to Vivian Boyack and Alice “Nonie” Dubes  talk about their life together.

More than 70 years after beginning their relationship, the couple finally got married.

“I guess at 90, now we don’t have to worry about anyone saying anything or doing anything about us. And so I think that we’ll be happy now.”

Vivian Boyack and Alice “Nonie” Dubes

Pretty Little Liars’ Sasha Pieterse Discuss Emily and Alison’s Relationship

Life can be hard for the budding, young, gay lady when she’s crushing on a straight girl, not least when that straight girl also happens to be her best friend and it comes at a time when she’s trying to deal with her not-so-heterosexual feelings.

Feel sorry for Pretty Little Liars’ Emily Fields then, the gay teen in that analogy, as not only was she forced to acknowledge the fact that she was in totally-definitely-not-heterosexual love with her best friend, Alison DiLaurentis. Then Alison proceeded to disappear, presumed dead with no chance of returning alive, or returning Emily’s feelings. But then earlier this season on PLL, Alison came back, alive, well and hinting that she liked Emily back too.

But after several girlfriends and years of Emily trying to get over her would Alison and Emily, “Emison”, be able to kiss and make up? Sasha Pieterse, the actress who plays Ali has since explained.

Pieterse acknowledges that questions and alarm bells were sounded by viewers alike when Emison reunited, promptly making out when Alison stayed at Emily’s house explaining that she didn’t want to be alone.

“I don’t think the audience can tell if Ali is genuine or if she’s playing Emily to get close to her or if she just wants Emily’s protection. I wasn’t sure at the beginning of the season where they were going to go with it, and how the fans were going to react”.

Sasha Pieterse

But is it real or, as we have seen somewhat from Ali already since her return, is this another one of her dirty, mind-muddling tricks?

“I think Alison is so scared to show her real feelings that we never really know what’s true and what isn’t. I can’t tell you too much about that, but you will be able to see more. I think the writers do a really good job of finding that balance, and even though these characters live in a heightened reality, there’s still a trueness about being that age and not being sure what you’re feeling. Alison hasn’t really had an opportunity to figure out who she is. Emily has had such a journey with it and she’s grown into herself. You will see more of Alison figuring herself out, and I’m excited to see how the fans react.”

Sasha Pieterse

That Ali is just coming to terms with her feelings (and keep in mind that her time away means that she probably wasn’t able to explore her sexuality or date women – or anyone of any gender – the way Emily has) rings true to the character so with half a season of Pretty Little Liars still left to go there’s still chance yet for the popular couple.

Source: AfterEllen